It's after May 1, which means most of you graduating seniors have decided which college will be receiving you—hot pot, Target extra-long twin-size comforter, and bendy lamp in tow—come August. Perhaps your acceptance letter has been gilded, framed, and enshrined in your bedroom, or laminated and mounted on the family fridge.
But what about those rejection letters? Thanks to the record number of kids graduating this year, the class of 2009 is receiving more of the good, the bad, and the ugly than ever before. We know you're part of Generation Green and don't like anything to go to waste, even soul-crushing reminders of the futility of your higher education dreams. So we present alternative uses for your college rejection letters:
- Ironic wrapping paper for graduation presents.
- Toilet paper.
- Confetti at your graduation party.
- Wallpaper for your new dorm room at the college where you did get accepted.
- Recycled paper on which to print the cathartic rejection letter to their rejection letter.
- Motivation before matches in your future life as a cage fighter.
- Motivation before performances in your future life as a Method actor.
- Papier-mâché furniture.
- Origami peace doves.
- High fashion paper hats.
- Snowflakes (no two rejection letters will ever be the same again).
- A journal in which to record memories of your freshman year at the college you will probably end up liking better than the one that rejected you in the first place.
Like phoenixes (sp?!) from the ashes, those rejection letters will rise again! What are you doing with yours?