Today we hear from a Sparkler who wants to go to a state school—just not HER state school. Read her email and tell her what to do! —Sparkitors
I am having a very difficult time at home due to the college application process. It seems that every time I try to broach the subject of applying to out-of-state schools, my mother gets very upset, almost angry that I even dared to bring it up. (I love my mom, I really do, but this is too much). I mean, I am a very good student and, according to class rank and other factors, I am in the top 5 percent of my class. I really want to do well for myself and I work extremely hard.
Now is my time to decide which school I would like to attend for four+ years. The thing is, I am confident that in-state schools will offer me at least some money, and clearly in-state schools are more affordable. In the back of my mind, however, I want to experience school in another state. My list of schools to apply to is really not large and the other schools I am thinking about (besides my state school) are other STATE schools. Each time I even try to ask my mom to consider letting me go to another school, she basically condemns my choices, asking questions such as: "why would you want to go to someone else's STATE school, when you could go to your state school?" and "what's so great about that school?" She really discourages me in that sense, and I feel like we can't talk about college at all, when parents are supposed to support you.
I know she wants what is best for me and our financial situation, but she makes me feel wrong for liking other schools besides our state school because I believe she really wants me to go there. But it is really unfair and "uncool" to criticize other schools. What's worse, she constantly "researches" both my state school (which I like, don't get me wrong, but am not IN LOVE with) and my other choices. She always finds negative things about the other schools, and GREAT things about our state school. I know for a fact that it is very difficult for us to afford schools that are not in our state, and I always end up feeling guilty and alone for not submissively agreeing to go to our state school (which, again, there is nothing wrong with.. I just feel like I want to get out there and get away from all of my in-state residents). Am I being selfish? I mean, am I wrong to want these things? I am told I can get just as good of an education here as I could elsewhere, and for less money. So, what am I supposed to do?
What do you think, Sparklers? Should she stick with her state school, or apply to other places?