Faye's blogging the college guide THE NAKED ROOMMATE. This week's topic: making new friends. Dun dun dunnnn! —Sparkitors
Chapter 4 of The Naked Roommate is Harv’s How-To section on finding friends in college. According to Harv, these helpful DO’s and DON’Ts will keep you from becoming a sad, antisocial, lonely human being.
Do treat college as a fresh start.
Don’t let who you were in high school decide the person you’ll become in college.
Do join lots of clubs and participate in group activities.
Don’t be afraid to just go up and talk to people.
Do take caution with your new friends—it will take some time before you really know them.
Don’t be upset if the people who are your friends the first week aren’t your friends at the end of the year. It’s normal for your group of friends to change.
Do keep in touch with your friends from high school.
Don’t use your copy of The Naked Roommate as a pillow.
That last one wasn’t a real tip, but I’m pretty sure Harv would have added it to the list after I fell asleep on him at the beach, accidentally ripping out the first 3 chapters. Anyway…
You might find this hard to believe, but I’m actually really shy, and I don’t like talking about myself. Which is completely weird considering I write a blog where I shout to the world boring details of my life. Despite my shyness, I found a group of loud, obnoxious, awesome people in high school who I like to call “friends.” As I write this I’m getting ready to go the Harry Potter premiere with them. I’m going as Harry.
So one of the things I’m worried about the most in college is making new friends. In high school, the whole joining clubs and just talking to people thing didn’t work. Most clubs had a teacher or older student talk about something while everyone else listened. There wasn’t really any “talk amongst yourselves and become friends” time. The people who I became friends with were the people in my classes who liked the same nerdy things I liked. I didn’t have to take too much “caution” because I went to a relatively small school. All you had to do was ask around and you could find out if your new friend could keep a secret. Asking around isn’t exactly going to work now in a school of 17,000 students.
If my life were a movie, making friends in college would be easy. The casting director would pick seven personalities—the funny one, the serious one, the one who gives really good advice, to name a few—and together, my roommates and I would get into all kinds of shenanigans. We’d have other minor characters outside the group too, who would use their specialties to assist us in especially difficult cases. After reading that last sentence over again, it sounds like my roommates and I might be a gang of superheroes all with different powers but a common mission to rid the world of evil everywhere. And after reading that last sentence, its abundantly clear that my expectations for college are no where near the realm of realistic.
I know my life isn’t a movie (and if it were, I‘m not sure how great the reviews would be). My roommates might not become my best friends right away, or even at all. Harv says if you just be yourself and get involved in things you love, friends will find you. So I’m going to listen to the book on this one.
We’ll see how that all turns out in seven weeks from now. Any other suggestions on how to make friends in college?
Until next week,
Got a tip for Faye? Leave it in the comments!
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