Opposite of Me (College Roommate Taylor Swift Parody)

Opposite of Me (College Roommate Taylor Swift Parody)

By Contributor

We're all for singing your feelings instead of just saying them, dac213!  It's very Glee. —Sparkitors

First, let me say that I am not narcissistic; it’s just that my college had us fill out a roommate questionnaire, supposedly to give us roommates we’d be compatible with. So I have no idea how I got a roommate who loves Taylor Swift and The Notebook when I like B.o.b. and Gladiator.

It’s not that I wanted a clone, I actually think that would be annoying, but from what I can tell we have NOTHING in common. What am I even going to talk about with her? And what was the point of taking the quesstionnaire if I was going to be assigned someone truly random?

Also, she never answered my Facebook message, which is just rude. I also want to make it clear that I am in no way a Taylor Swift fan, but in honor of my new roommate, I’ve written this parody of her song “You Belong With Me.”

I’m on the computer, ‘bout to check my college e-mail
If it’s not The Message, this is a fail
Yes, here it is, the name of my room—mate

I go on Facebook and add her as a friend
She confirms, time to creep her profile and
Oh no, we might have a prob¬lem

She likes sports, I don’t know why
Her taste in movies makes me wanna cry
What if, the worst, we get to school and I find
That she hates Harry Potter and loves Twi¬light?!

If you knew me and you saw her Facebook info
You would know for sure, how I know
That she-eee-eeee
Is the exact opposite of me [opposite of me]

I need to look at that roommate questionnaire
Can’t remember what music I put on there
But I know I never put country ‘cause
I hate that type of music

And this girl actually likes the Jonas Brothers
Seriously? Time to commiserate with my mother
She better not put up a bunch of posters
Oh gosh, what if she has one of Justin Bieber?!

Is there a vaccine for Bieber Fever?
I think I need to call my doctor
‘Cause there is no way, that I am gonna catch
A love of bad music, I’m sticking with rap!

If you knew me and you saw her Facebook info
You would know for sure, how I know that she
Is the exact opposite of me

She hasn’t listed any favorite books
What if she doesn’t read? I can’t look
Oh pleeee-eee-ease!
She’s the exact opposite of me [opposite of me]

Checking out our dorm, no closet it’s a ward-robe
I hope for both our sakes she doesn’t bring too many clothes
Because I see that her hometown is further away than mine
Don’t wanna have to drive home for fresh clothes every night

Now can you see why I might need a new roommate?
Bad luck just seems to be my fate
Oh plee-ee-ease!
She is the exact opposite of me

Wondering how long until I can switch
When we meet hope she is not a !@#$%
Or ell-ell-ell-else
I’ll be moving house

If you knew me you’d know
That she
Is the exact opposite of me
Opposite of me

Did anyone else get a roommate who seems to be the opposite on paper?

Related Post: Blogging Taylor Swift: Mine

Topics: college, taylor swift, roommates, dorms

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