Faye is still stuck in the Friend Zone with no way out. What now? —Sparkitors
My crush Ash thinks I’m hot!
But I'm getting ahead of myself. Here’s the story:
It was Saturday night (technically early Sunday morning) and Ash, my fake-boyfriend and I were hanging out in my room, taking a break from decorating the floor. (We won the contest by the way, WOO!). Somehow we got onto the subject of relationships (because all our conversations wind up there eventually). Ash was giving me flirting advice: 1) Laugh at a guy’s jokes, regardless of how lame they are and 2) Make physical contact—you know, give him a playful shove or two.
College Fact #6: If you want a guy to like you, push him down a flight of stairs. Then laugh.
Well, maybe not a whole flight. I told Ash I was going to break cute Chem. guy’s leg, then nurse him back to health so he’d fall madly in love with me. He said that’s probably not the best idea.
Then we started talking about whether or not I have hot friends. We proceeded to Facebook stalk my photos, eventually making our way to my Senior Prom album. I thought all my friends looked gorgeous, and my fake boyfriend agreed because he’s a sweetheart, but Ash said they were just okay. Then we got to one photo and Ash stopped me.
Ash: That girl’s pretty hot.
Me: This one?
Ash: No, the one on the right.
Me: Yeah, she did look amazing in that green dress.
Ash: No, the one between them. Wearing white.
Me: Uhhh, that’s me.
And then Ash freaked out, saying he didn’t realize it was me, he shouldn’t have said that, it was late and he was tired, he was sitting farther away from the computer, I looked different, blah blah blah. He accidentally thought I was hot in the prom dress you all picked out for me! Sparklers and sleep deprivation for the win.
Want to know what else is a win? The bet. Yup, Ash is calling it quits on Physics girl. He said she was boring. (But he only talked to her two times, so I don’t know how he determined she was boring so fast. Unless she mentioned she enjoys watching paint dry and standing in lines or something.) That means I don’t have to run 1.5 miles AND I’m getting breakfast. Double win! I’m thinking about cashing in Saturday morning—should I get pancakes or an omelet? Pshh, I’ll just get both—he’s buying.
Now I know what you’re thinking: “OMG Faye, just tell him you like him!” But you can’t just tell a guy you like him. It makes you look like an idiot. (A Very Potter Musical reference, anyone?) In all seriousness though, I can’t just tell Ash I like him. If he doesn’t like me back, then things could get really awkward. We could lose our easygoing flirtatious-friendship-thing because he doesn’t want to lead me on. If he does like me, then things still get awkward—remember the whole, “I’ve never had a boyfriend” thing? That still applies. I’m a relationship n00b. There’s the whole floor-cest thing, too. I’m trapped in more-than-friends limbo. *Sigh*
Math class, on the other hand, isn’t going so well. I’m failing Calculus. I legitimately have an F in Calc. Faye, who’s never had below an A on her report card, is failing math, her best subject. Before you get all judge-y on me, here’s the thing: it’s not that I’ve gone wild and crazy in college and I don’t care about my grades anymore. I’m not out partying all the time. Yes, I do watch the occasional movie or go out shopping with a group of friends, but I spend a lot more time working than I spend having fun. My classes are hard and there’s a lot of work to do for them. The problem I have with Calculus is that it kept getting pushed to the bottom of my list of things to do. When you have an Engineering paper worth 10% of your grade due on Monday and a packet of math problems that are never going to be collected, you tend to spend more time on the paper. But if you don’t do all the math problems, you don’t understand them, so when they show up on the exam (which is the only thing that determines your grade), you fail. And that’s what happened to me.
There’s still hope though. I talked to the professor about it, and his policy is that if you do better on exam 2 and the final, he won’t take exam 1 into consideration. That means if you get an F on exam 1 but an A on exam 2 and the final, you'll get an A, not a C. That also means that I need to work really hard, because the next exam is two weeks from now.
So here’s my advice for next year’s college freshmen: Don’t get behind on your work. And as soon as you don’t understand something, get help. Talking to college professors might seem scary, but failing the course is a lot worse.
I’ll let you all know how my breakfast goes! I’m off to do math all night, 'cause sleep is for the weak.
Do you think Faye should just go for it with Ash?
Related Post: Sleep is for the Weak
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