Cheap, Last-Minute Valentine's Day Gifts
I am PRO at doing things on the cheap. Note that “on the cheap” does not necessarily mean you're a cheapskate. It simply means you're resourceful. College makes you that way—ask any college student what kinds of the things they've used as a desk, and I bet they'll list at least five non-desk items (stolen lunch trays are my favorite).
I'm also really good at doing things at the last minute, which is another skill finely honed by my years in academia (just the other day, I started the Epic of Gilgamesh at 11:00, and finished the paper on it by 4.) Here are all my best ideas for Valentine's Day gifts for your significant other.
1. A picture/frame combo of you and your significant other. If you want to be over-the-top-vomit-in-my-mouth-adorable, you can decorate the frame. Preferably, with glitter. Everything is better with glitter.
2. Community Season 2. Nothing could ever top the gift of Community Season 2, for it is the gift of life. There's a slight chance that I could be biased.
3. Conversation hearts. Yes, conversational hearts are clichéd and taste awful, so you should make up for it by being cute. Fill your S.O.'s locker to the brim with conversation hearts. Spell out a sentence by glueing them to a card. Place them on the floor, in three-foot intervals, luring your object of desire into a box trap.
4. A well-worn copy of your favorite book. This, perhaps, is a gift for those slightly more skeptical of the blessed holiday. (I'll admit, I am one—I just like giving presents.) You should be in a fairly committed relationship if you want to pull this one off. And that relationship should be with someone who has good taste in books. It simply wouldn't do to give your beat-up copy of Hitchhiker's Guide, in which you underlined all your favorite lines (even though they're all good), to someone who doesn't appreciate life, the universe, or anything.
5. A mix CD. Slightly predictable, I know, but if you can pull it off, it's the good kind of predictable. Just put Sea of Love on it as many times as possible. Fill the CD with Sea of Love, in fact. It's really the only song you need.
6. A card. Now, if you get him/her/it a card, you are gonna HAVE to make it an exceptional card, 'cause cards are lame. Either learn calligraphy and write your S.O. the best darn letter you've ever written in your life, or put your latent artistic skills to the test, and paint a masterpiece. An anatomically accurate heart, perhaps. Or a couple bleeding to death from Cupid's arrow. I'm just full of good ideas today...
Unfortunately, I can't give you guys my Best Idea Ever, because a certain special someone reads these, and it simply wouldn't do to blow the surprise. It's a doozy, let me tell you. I'll let you know if I ever finish it. (Hint: it has so far involved several papercuts.)
Ginger's Song of the Week: If you're stuck on ideas for your mix CD, Miles Davis is always a good choice.
What are you giving your S.O.?