Cheapskate Reviewer: A Little Girl and a Carnival
Close your eyes right now and imagine you’re in a grungy little café, sipping cold coffee that tastes like finger paint. You ask for more foam, because that’s the only thing you can choke down. There’s an open mic going on, and this girl holding her MacBook walks up and starts slobbering on the microphone as she sings, while the computer plays techno beats.
There’s a guy sitting next to you who’s mooching off of you for coffee and biscotti. He sucks down mocha after mocha, and all the while criticizes the people playing and keeps asking you what you think of bands that start with G.
He’s me. Everything else is Cheapskate Reviews.
Indie Spotlight: “Oblivion” by Grimes. With creepy vocals and a moody, beat-y background that, at times, sounds like music from Super Smash Brothers Brawl, this indie piece beckons you with one finger and flips you off with the other. Weird part: it sounds like a nine-year-old little girl with a lisp is singing to you. Weirder part: she’s singing “see you on a dark night” over and over. This song kinda freaks you out but manages to keep your interest. Three out of five stars.
Single of the Week: “Carnivale Time (feat. Al “Carnival Time” Johnson)” by Galactic. If a bunch of guys got together to make a band, realized that none of them played the same genre of music, but decided to write a song anyway, this is what would’ve happened. “Oh, Billy, you play trumpet? You can play right after Juanita on the maracas.” Electric guitar, bonga drums, it’s all good! It’s carnival time! (Which is what 75 percent of the lyrics happen to be.) And who is Al “Carnival Time” Johnson? He sounds like a mob boss who puts his victims in a shooting gallery and blasts their heads off while winning a fluffy unicorn. Two out of five stars, because it was fun to listen to. And it was short. That was nice, too.