If Demi Lovato really wanted to meet Paul McCartney, she could’ve done what most stars do: have her people call his people to set up a meet and greet; maybe a quick cup of coffee at the Hollywood Starbucks. But, the ever-creative Lovato chose another route, so to speak: she tried to run him over with her car.
Using more periods and exclamation points than allowed by law (or the boundaries of good grammar), Demi tweeted her story recently: “.... today I was pulling into a parking space that some guys were standing in the middle of, and almost hit them..... When one of the guys turned around.... it was a BEATLE........ Yes, YOU HEARD ME.... SIR PAUL McCARTNEY!!! He was so sweet!! Can't believe I met him today.. WOW! And.... I can't believe I almost ran over a Beatle...”.
But, hark, do we hear a marketing opportunity blowing down the breezy avenues of Hollywood? Of course! A Paul McCartney cover album! Or even better, a duet album! Who could resist a set of Macca's songs about cars, roads, and driving, rendered sweet yet savory by the impossibly cute Miss Lovato? Imagine these songs recorded at 120 beats per minute, with just a dash of autotune:
Let Me Roll It: This one, originally recorded for his Band On The Run album, goes like this: "My heart is like a wheel, let me roll it." We suggest Lovato reinterpret the tune as "My hands just left the wheel, let me roll over him...".
Ticket To Ride: "She's got a ticket to ride and I don't care." That's probably not the case anymore, but there's a certain sentimentality that comes after a near-death experience.
Why Don't We Do It In The Road: Perhaps a little sassy for a youngster like Miss Lovato but, if properly reframed, "it" could refer to CPR and a whole new set of Red Cross public service announcements could be born.
Drive My Car: "Beep beep um beep beep, yeah." If only she had thought of that.
Helen Wheels: We suggest calling the album Demi Lovato Goes To Helen Wheels and making this the title track. Ringo "Almost The Last Beatle Standing" Starr can guest on drums.
Suffice it say, we're sure happy Demi Lovato wasn't around when the Beatles decided to cross the street for the cover of Abbey Road. If she'd been driving down the street in ‘68 (right side, left side, doesn't matter), Paul really would have been dead and the Fab Four would have been known as the Blood Spattered Three.
As it happened though, Lovato's recent brush with Beatles history was simply a brush of her Mercedes along Sir Paul's impeccably talented pant leg. Thankfully, the Cute Beatle will be around for that Wings reunion we're all hoping for.
What's your favorite Paul McCartney song?