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Which Avengers Didn't Make The Cut? Nick Fury Narrates

Emorrigan, Witch of The West (Village)

Distinguishing Powers: Encyclopedic knowledge of Avenged Sevenfold catalog; Learned scythe-wielding mastery as high school Color guard captain; achieves near invisibility at night (except for skin, which is slightly fluorescent); noise-canceling headphones can block out all the world's misery except her own. Reason Rejected: Kind of a downer Nick Fury Says: "I was digging the glam reaper vibe, and I would've learned to overlook the constant buzz of MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE that was LEAKING out of her STUPID-ENORMOUS headphones (which, by the way, she NEVER TURNED OFF during the interview—that's bad form, kids!)! But what REALLY got me was the straight-up NEGATIVE attitude in the abstract poetry she forced me to read as her cover letter. It's like, it's BAD ENOUGH that I've got to deal with Captain America's whining about his dead girlfriend, or whatever. A man can only muster so much fake give-a-crap, you know?"
Tags: movies, slideshows, celebrity slideshows, the avengers, avengers, summer blockbusters, avengers movie, nick fury

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About the Author
Brandon Specktor

For 22 years, Brandon was a fat kid living in Tucson, AZ, which gave him lots and lots of time to write. He now works at a magazine in New York City, but still loves writing almost as much as he loves muffins.

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