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Which Avengers Didn't Make The Cut? Nick Fury Narrates

By Brandon Specktor May 4, 2012

8 of 11

Sir Stripsalot

Distinguishing Powers: Fastest, most furious stripper in the West Reason rejected: Skills not pertinent Nick Fury Says: "When he first started rippin' his clothes off I expected the dude to be wearing some kind of SUPER SUIT or SPANDEX or ANYTHING below his street clothes, but nope. Nope. Just his BARE. BUTT. FLESH. I mean, the dude's confidence was pretty impressive. I definitely gave him points for that. But I'm still not sure he even HAD any super powers, and I'm POSITIVE he ain't the KNIGHT of anything, except maybe his own FANTASY REALM or something. Oh well. Save it for the Avengentleman's Club, big guy. I hear they're hiring new talent, too."
Tags: movies, slideshows, celebrity slideshows, the avengers, avengers, summer blockbusters, avengers movie, nick fury

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About the Author
Brandon Specktor

Brandon is a writer and humor editor at Reader's Digest magazine. He was born in Tucson, Arizona, and wants to write a paranormal Western that begins, "First the cows turned up dead." What should the rest be about? Tell him on twitter @beardspeck.

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.

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