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Jeremy Renner Kicks Serious Witch-Butt in the Hansel and Gretel Trailer

Jeremy Renner Kicks Serious Witch-Butt in the Hansel and Gretel Trailer

By Vadim Newquist

Yup. Hansel and Gretel have grown up and now they hunt witches. Although the trailer gives us the enormous guns and blockbuster level explosions we'd expect to find in a Michael Bay picture, the film is actually produced by the duo of Will Ferrel and Adam Mccay. It. Looks. Insane.

On one hand it seems to have more of a sense of humor to it than the similar (and abysmal) Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, but it doesn't look quite like a laugh riot either. Check it out and judge for yourself:

Here are some passing thoughts:

-00:20: The entrance to the Witch's house of candy kind of looks like a day-glow Slinky.

-00:29: I hope Jeremy Renner took good care of Laurence Fishburne's Matrix jacket.

-00:56: That might just be the first female headbutt caught on celluloid.

-1:02: Dude, who needs a speeder bike when you've got a broomstick?… No seriously though, that HAS to be inspired by Return of the Jedi.

-1:15: Contrary to reports from the Scandanavian Witch Association children are not part of a healthy, balanced diet.

-1:35: Considering that Famke Jansen still looks exactly like she did in the first X-Men I'm starting to think she might actually be a witch!

-1:55: Conjoined, killer-goth twins??? Awesome!

-2:08: Apparently "you gotta be kidding me" was a saying back in the 1600's too.

Will you be seeing Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters?

Tags: movies, trailers, jeremy renner, famke jansen, hansel and gretel

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About the Author
Vadim Newquist

Vadim Newquist is a writer, director, actor, animator, fire fighter, stunt driver, martial arts instructor, snake wrangler and time traveling bounty hunter who scales tall buildings with his bare hands and wrestles sharks in his spare time. He can do ten consecutive backflips in one jump, make cars explode with his mind, and can give fifty people a high-five at once without even lifting his hands. He holds multiple PhDs in nuclear physics, osteopathic medicine, behavioral psychology, breakdancing, and chilling out. He currently resides in Gotham City inside his stately mansion with his butler Alfred and his two cats.

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.