Usually Chelsea Dagger covers movies, but I dumped a bucket of seaweed on her head and locked her in the closet because JONAH HILL IS THE FUNNIEST, MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN IN THE GALAXY. And I am going to INTERVIEW him about his new movie, 21...More →
I'm sorry, but I just can't stop it. I can't stop these turtle facts. It's like a faucet, and the water keeps coming out, and right when I try to turn it off I remember that I'm afraid of faucets. And also, instead of water,...More →
All Star Western has been one of the biggest surprises to come out of DC Comics' 2011 reboot. While there was no way this comic could have been bad (writers Jimmy Palmiotti and Justin Gray have been working magic with the book's main character, Jonah...More →
The Oscars are a night full of revelation. We now know, for example, that the makeup artist who made Meryl Streep look like an old lady is somehow more impressive than the team of artists who made a legion of actors look like Gringotts employees....More →
We have done an exhaustive search throughout the high schools of America, and we think we have finally found the worst gym teacher, ever. To protect the anonymity of his coworkers and students, we have kept the school that he works for a secret. The...More →
Hello my fair and attentive readers! I’m glad you can join me again. I got some good questions this week, and also some questions that angered me so much I bit my own tongue. I’ll get to the questions in a moment, but first an update:...More →
You, the reader, are probably a guy, and you are probably interested in dating girls, who are probably girls. At the risk of generalization, this feature will deal with ways that guys can attract and hold onto girls,...More →
The President wears many hats. He is the Commander-in-chief of America's military, he inspires and encourages American citizens as an upstanding Chief of State, and, as Barack Obama recently reminded us in a blues-off with Mick Jagger and B.B. King, the President must also hold the...More →
Have you seen Rebel Without A Cause? Some say it's a classic; we say it's dated, tedious and smells funny, but maybe that's just because we were forced to watch it in every Important Films 101 class we ever took, so we're bitter. In the...More →
