The Naked Roommate author Harlan Cohen has a new book coming out in April (I get to read an advanced copy now because I'm extremely fancy). It's called Naked Dating: Five Steps to Finding the Love of Your Life (While Fully Clothed & Totally Sober), and it's SO GOOD!
Cohen says that to find love, you have to accept this fact:
"NOT everyone you want will want you. Thousands will, but millions will not...This means that in order to take the risks needed to find love (while sober and clothed), we must be able to handle the possible pain of rejection before, during, and after a relationship." He says that once you accept this "Universal Rejection Truth," going up to people you're interested in gets way less scary.
I have to admit, I can count on one hand the number of times I've gone up to guys I thought were hot. My excuse was 1) terror, and 2) my old-fashioned ladylike insistence on being wooed by suitors.
Cohen thinks girls like me are full of unicorn poop. "Some of you will hide behind the excuse that you’re old-fashioned. In other words, you expect everyone else to do the approaching. I have one word for you—OLD. You risk getting old waiting."
Aaaa! Scary! But true!
I wish I'd started forcing myself to go up to guys when I was, oh, fourteen years old, and then kept on forcing myself until it felt normal. If you make yourself do terrifying things over and over, they get way less terrifying, and you get to go on way more dates with nice-lookin' boys.
Do you make the first move when you're interested in someone? Or do you need a dose of Harlan's real talk?
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