I've Never Accomplished Anything

Last week’s post on study stress inspired some great questions from a few Sparklers. This week, I’m going to address a few. Anonymoushorse left the following comment in reaction to a tip suggesting that you stop comparing your academic achievements to those of other students:

I have a problem as well that wasn't addressed--for me, I have barely any confidence. Each time I get low grades, I feel worse and worse, and not only that … I feel no good college would accept me except for the fact that I don't feel I have enough time to worry- I'm worrying about choosing a major, choosing a career, dorm life, applications, and accomplishments(none so far... well I did have a few in middle school but that doesn't help since colleges look at accomplishments done during high school) and this keeps me from being able to do #2 on the list. Any tips?

As anonymoushorse demonstrates, a lack of confidence can lead directly to stress: You don't feel like your accomplishments are good enough, and you don’t see how you will ever be able to handle all of life's trials, like choosing a major and living with a weird roommate who marks the level of soda left in their bottle to make sure no one else is drinking it (true story).

So what can you do to feel more confident? Here are a few things:

1. Re-think your accomplishments. One of the things that troubles this reader is having no accomplishments to put on a college application. Knowing that you can accomplish your goals is key for gaining confidence, even if college apps aren't the central focus. But often we think of accomplishments as big milestones, instead of our day-to-day achievements. Have you participated in sports, debate, or  theater? Have you held down an after-school job? Do you take care of your younger siblings while your parents work? Do you volunteer for anything? Some of the things that you do every day are likely some of your greatest accomplishments, and college admissions committees will love to hear about then.

2. Do something. O.K., so maybe that first tip won’t work for you. Maybe your day really does consist of going to school, coming home, barely doing your homework, and spending the rest of your night sacked out in front of the TV. If you’re feeling insecure about your lack of accomplishments, then go out right now and add a few things to your list. Even if you’re a junior or senior, it’s not too late. Maybe you won’t get the lead in the high school play, but you can be in the chorus or help the backstage crew. If it’s college applications you’re worried about, even a few activities will show that you’re making an effort. And if it’s your confidence in general that you’re trying to improve, being part of a group working toward the same goal—whether  it’s a sports team or a group of soup kitchen volunteers—is a great way to boost your self-esteem.

3. Focus on what you can control. This reader is overwhelmed by low grades, and sometimes despite our best efforts, grades aren’t something that we can control. But you can boost your confidence by concentrating on factors within your power. For example, if you bombed the last test, then make a study plan for the next one: What new methods will you incorporate into your study efforts? What questions will you ask your teacher to help you understand where you went wrong on the last test? By focusing on what you can do to improve your academic success and then following through, you will improve your confidence. More often than not, you'll improve your grades as well.

4. Stay in the present. It’s very easy to let your mind spin off into the future, worrying over college majors, careers, or the prospect of living in your parents’ basement for the rest of your life. It's perfectly normal to obsess over what’s to come. However, too much obsessing and worrying can really hurt your confidence. Concentrating on what you need to accomplish in the immediate future will keep you from feeling overwhelmed and desperate. Once you accomplish the goals in your immediate future—like implementing the right study plan to ace that AP U.S. History test—you’ll start to feel more confident in other areas of your life. Maybe you will be able to pick a major when the time comes (and nothing's wrong with staying “undeclared” until then), handle a weirdo roommate, and figure out the kind of job you’d like to have.

What do you do when you're feeling less than confident? Share with us below, and email your questions to testpreptutor@sparknotes.com.

Related Post: Study Tips for the Stressed Out Student