A Sample “3” Issue Essay
Now that you know what to do for the Issue essay, here’s what
not to do. In fact, here’s what can happen if you don’t write a
three-act essay or include the necessary cast of characters. The following essay
would receive a “3” on the test:
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While we can learn a little from agreements, we can learn
more from conflcits than we can from agreements. When you have
conflicts you are often fighting over different opinions or
ideas. If you have agreements you just agree and there is little
to talk about or discuss. History provides many examples of
conflicts and learning from conflicts. Just think about any war.
War is a conflict where two sides want two different things. If
we didn’t want two different things, there would be agreement
and we would never learn.
Another example is when you fight with your family. You
want one thing and they want another. You just never learn if
you want the same thing. Conflicts teach you how to compromise
and work things out. If you agree there is no need to
compromise. Everything is to easy that way. You also learn from
conflicts because you have to try and convince people that youre
way is the right way and that their way is the wrong way. You
must use skills you don’t need to when you just agree. When
there is conflict there is also learning. When there is
agreement no one learns.
In conclusion, then, agreement have less value than
conflict. Many examples show this, and there are certainly many
others. It’s clear that we can learn from conflicts and
arguments with the right perspective.
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Why This Essay Deserves a “3”
Okay, this essay’s pretty bad. But let’s see exactly why it would
receive a mediocre score. Thinking about what this essay does poorly will
help you concentrate on avoiding these mistakes on your own GRE essays.
To begin with, it doesn’t demonstrate thoughtful organization or
include a stellar cast of characters. The argument—that conflict is
better than agreement—never really gets off the ground. It
contains only two examples (one about war and the other about family), but
neither is developed. The writer could have strengthened the essay by
talking about one specific war or one specific fight. Its organization is
only fair, as it combines the introduction and first example into a single
paragraph.
There are no transitions between paragraphs or sentences. Although the
grammar and spelling are not horrible, this essay does contain at least a
few errors (conflcits, to easy; youre, and
agreement have). The sentence structure is repetitive. Note how
many sentences in the second paragraph begin with You. The
word choice is more like that of a third grader than a college graduate.
So, how does this poor essay stack up against the official ETS
criteria and our checklist? Not very well. This essay misses the mark in
almost every respect. Every “no” in the chart represents yet another
weakness of this particular essay. Remember: To get a “6,” you need to
answer “yes” to most or all criteria.
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ETS CRITERIA
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YES OR NO?
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Responds to the issue
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YES
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Develops a position on the issue through the use of
incisive reasons and persuasive examples
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NO
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Ideas are conveyed clearly and
articulately
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NO
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Maintains proper focus on the issue and is well
organized
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NO
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Demonstrates proficiency, fluency, and maturity in
its use of sentence structure, vocabulary, and
idioms
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NO
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Demonstrates an excellent command of the elements of
standard written English, including grammar, word usage,
spelling, and punctuation—but may contain minor flaws in
these areas
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NO
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OUR CRITERIA
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YES OR NO?
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Uses the three-act essay structure
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NO
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Thesis statement in first sentence of paragraph
1
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YES
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Three examples that support the thesis listed in
paragraph 1, in the order in which they’re discussed in
essay
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NO
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Topic sentence for example 1 in paragraph
2
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YES
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Development sentences to support example
1
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NO
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Topic sentence for example 2 in paragraph
3
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NO
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Development sentences to support example
2
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NO
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Topic sentence for example 3 in paragraph
4
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NO
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Development sentences to support example
3
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NO
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Conclusion (paragraph 5) rephrases thesis
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YES
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Conclusion (paragraph 5) expands position
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NO
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