By the time it ended, my jaw was on the floor. Before I devolve into the same kind of incoherency I rolled around in yesterday, let’s sum up.
Marvel’s the Avengers 2: Hot People Look Even Hotter While Angsting Age of Ultron deals with the Avengers in the aftermath of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s collapse. Because Tony Stark wants to help and has never heard of science fiction, he creates some super-sophisticated, super-self-aware Artificial Intelligence (Ultron) and uploads it into a bunch of robots. Of course, this is a terrible plan, because the robots take one look at humanity (see: the least peaceful species on the planet) and decide to murder everybody. It’s up to the Avengers to save the daaay!
Okay. Let the incoherent babbling commence.
How badly are they all messing up that everybody in the trailer is so upset? Can I hug them? All of them? Bruce and Cap look TRAUMATIZED. And, and Cap’s shield? WHAT HAPPENED? Will Asgardians ever stop lifting Tony Stark by the throat? How freakin’ creepy is James Spader’s voice? How incredible do Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver look?
And oh Hawkeye, how I missed you. How I hope you’ll get so much screen time. And ooo, check Black Widow riding a motorcycle out of a chopper like she’s the dang Terminator, YES. Is Thor wearing a huge red peacoat? WAS THAT RHODEY? Who put that Hulk buster there? Does ballet plus winter forest equal Russia? Are we going to get some Black Widow backstory? Can they get Bucky to help out, since he’s part machine now anyway? WHY IS BRUCE SO SAD?
We’re all in this together, my friends. Care to join me in my time of yelling?! Share your feels below.