SparkNotes Blog

There Will Be an Heir!

Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge, aka Princess Kate Middleton, is expecting a baby! The tabloids have been buzzing (lying) about this since she wed Prince William, but the royal couple officially confirmed it in a press release.

The family announced it after the princess was admitted to the hospital suffering from hyperemesis gravidarum, which is not a Hogwarts spell, but rather the medical term of morning sickness.

Congrats to the happy couple! Now, onto the most important part: what is the royal couple going to name this baby?

Except, it will almost certainly be boring. No Apples and Sprockets have ever come out of the royal family, especially not one who could ascend to the throne.

Therefore, we give you a list of very boring names that this lucky child will almost certainly have.

A little prince:

  • Charles
  • Harry
  • Henry
  • James
  • George
  • William
  • Alexander
  • Fredrick
  • Edward
  • Leopold
  • Otto
  • Macbeth
  • Oedipus

A little princess:

  • Diana
  • Catherine
  • Elizabeth
  • Mary
  • Anastasia
  • Anna
  • Victoria
  • Sophia
  • Margaret
  • Caroline
  • Isabella
  • Special Disney Princess Edition: Ariel, Aurora, Fiona, Jasmine, Tianna
  • Cleopatra
  • Antoinette

What do you think the royal couple should name their baby?