{"id":1444675,"date":"2021-05-06T10:00:58","date_gmt":"2021-05-06T14:00:58","guid":{"rendered":"\/blog\/?p=1444675"},"modified":"2021-05-06T09:57:41","modified_gmt":"2021-05-06T13:57:41","slug":"every-book-on-your-english-syllabus-summed-up-in-john-mulaney-quotes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"\/blog\/every-book-on-your-english-syllabus-summed-up-in-john-mulaney-quotes\/","title":{"rendered":"Every Book on Your English Syllabus, Summed Up in John Mulaney Quotes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img src=\"http:\/\/img.sparknotes.com\/content\/sparklife\/sparktalk\/johnmulaneyclassiclitMAIN_LargeWide.jpg\" alt=\"\"\/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m just going to say it: there are too many books.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If the average person reads, say, ten books per year, then they&#8217;ll ultimately only read about 800 of the approximately 129,864,880 books in existence, a number I got by typing \u201cHow many books are there\u201d into Google and then refusing to research the matter further. (Is that number current? Does it account for self-publishing? I don&#8217;t know! It&#8217;s none of my business!)&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>These are dispiriting figures, and a grim reminder that our lives are but a negligible blip on the timeline of history. Yikes. Where was I going with this? I had a point&#8230; oh yeah! Here is every book you&#8217;ll have to read in English class summed up in a quote by comedian (and English major) John Mulaney, because while it may not be the same as actually reading the books themselves, at the very least you might get a chuckle out of it and forget for one brief and shining moment that death is coming.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m just going to say it: there are too many books.&nbsp; If the average person reads, say, ten books per year, then they&#8217;ll ultimately only read about 800 of the approximately 129,864,880 books in existence,   <a class=\"continue-reading\" href=\"#\"><span class=\"continue-text\">continue reading<\/span><svg class=\"continue-icon\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"24\" height=\"24\" alt=\"\">\n    <path fill=\"#007acd\" fill-rule=\"nonzero\" d=\"M13.442 5.558L19.885 12l-6.443 6.442-.884-.884 4.934-4.934L4 12.625v-1.25l13.492-.001-4.934-4.932.884-.884z\"><\/path>\n  <\/svg><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":182,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[7],"tags":[628,2335,24466,25165,25017,24370],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1444675"}],"collection":[{"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/182"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1444675"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1444675\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1447265,"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1444675\/revisions\/1447265"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1444675"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1444675"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1444675"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}