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BEATRICE
60Very easily possible. He wears his faith but as the fashion of
his hat; it ever changes with the next block.
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BEATRICE It’s entirely possible. He’s incredibly
fickle—his affection changes faster than the latest
fashions.
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MESSENGER I see, lady, the gentleman is not in your books.
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MESSENGER I can see you don’t like this gentleman.
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BEATRICE No. An he were, I would burn my study. But I pray you,
who is his companion? Is there no young squarer now that
65will make a voyage with him to the devil?
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BEATRICE No, absolutely not. But please tell me, who’s his best
friend? Isn’t there some new swaggering young ruffian who
will happily go to hell with Benedick?
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MESSENGER He is most in the company of the right noble Claudio.
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MESSENGER He spends most of his time with the good, noble Claudio.
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BEATRICE O Lord, he will hang upon him like a disease! He is sooner
caught than the pestilence, and the taker runs presently
mad. God help the noble Claudio! If he have caught the
70Benedick, it will cost him a thousand pound ere a be cured.
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BEATRICE Oh God, Benedick will plague him like a disease! Benedick is an
infection that’s easy to catch but hard to get rid
of—and he’ll drive you crazy once
you’ve been infected. God help Claudio! If
he’s caught the Benedick, he’ll lose all his
money before he’s cured.
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MESSENGER I will hold friends with you, lady.
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MESSENGER I’m going to make sure I stay on your good side,
lady.
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BEATRICE Do, good friend.
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BEATRICE Do that, my friend.
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LEONATO You will never run mad, niece.
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LEONATO You will never fall victim to Benedick’s charms, my
niece.
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BEATRICE No, not till a hot January.
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BEATRICE No, not until we see a hot January.
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MESSENGER
75Don Pedro is approached.
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MESSENGER Don Pedro is here.
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Enter DON PEDRO, Prince of Aragon,
with CLAUDIO,
BENEDICK,BALTHASAR, and
DON JOHN the bastard
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DON PEDRO, Prince of Aragon, enters
with CLAUDIO,
BENEDICK,BALTHASAR, and
DON JOHNDon John is Don Pedro’s illegitimate half-brother. DON JOHN , the bastard. |
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DON PEDRO Good Signor Leonato, are you come to meet your trouble?
The fashion of the world is to avoid cost, and you encounter
it.
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DON PEDRO My dear Signior Leonato, hosting my whole army is such a huge
burden, but you accept it—and me—with open
arms. Most people choose to avoid trouble, but you run to it.
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