Have you ever been frustrated with the “phoniness” of people in your life? Have you ever been referred to as “tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me” by that cute, brooding guy in your …
Odds are you will never be asked to describe the Harry Potter books. This is mostly because everyone already knows what they are, and anyone who DOESN’T is very likely a space alien, which presents …
We get it. You know books. You know them by their first sentence, by their last sentence, probably by their fourth sentence of the seventh paragraph in the twenty-eighth chapter. But do you know them by …
Characters in classic literature are good at many things, including but not limited to eating stale bread, wearing corsets, and dying of consumption. Yet there is one thing they do so well as to render …
My last words will likely be “Wow! That was a close one,” or “Don’t worry, sharks are more afraid of you than you are of them.” This will likely happen over text, which will actually …
According to every English teacher I have ever had, the greatest sin of all is ending your essay with the phrase “in conclusion.” I mean, okay, it may not be gluttony or hubris or murder, …
Good, important books get banned all the time. It’s dumb, sure, but unfortunately it’s nothing new. For instance, you probably wouldn’t be surprised to learn that The Catcher in the Rye has been banned for being “obscene,” …
So you’ve finally done it. You’ve made a genuine connection with another person, you’ve established a mutual interest, you’ve followed each other on Instagram and accidentally liked each other’s selfies from 2013. What comes next …
Let’s be real: we all know Wilbert Slinkhard to be the esteemed author of Magical Defensive Theory in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, but he SOUNDS like he could be a wayward musician running afoul of the fairy …
I’ve lived 20-odd years on this earth, and I have yet to deliver a clever but vicious insult to someone who fully deserves it. I’ve never uttered the words “I could agree with you, but …