"You sound remarkably fine with this." 

 

Rhys glanced over a shoulder to where I lingered by the foot of the massive ivory bed [...] "It's their life, their relationship. They have both had plenty of opportunities to confess what they feel. Yet they have not, Mor especially. For private reasons of her own, I'm sure. My meddling isn't going to make it any better."  

In Chapter 47, during a brief pause in the war with Hybern, Feyre confronts Rhysand about the complicated relationship between Azriel and Mor. Though Azriel clearly loves Mor, she has casual sex with other male faeries without directly rejecting Azriel. As a result, Feyre wonders why Mor has failed to act upon her own love for Azriel and seems to be stringing him along.  

Rhysand, however, rejects Feyre’s suggestion that they might push Azriel and Mor to act upon their feelings. “It’s their life, their relationship,” he insists, encapsulating his refusal to get involved in the personal affairs of others. Though Rhysand’s apparent apathy frustrates Feyre, he feels strongly that meddling in their relationship would be the wrong move, as both must have “private reasons” for keeping their feelings to themselves.  

Rhysand’s response here reflects the respect for personal autonomy and independence that he shows throughout the novel. Though he is both a close friend and a political ruler, he feels that Azriel and Mor must be able to make their own decisions, even if their reasons are difficult to understand. The novel suggests that individuals must be given the time and space to make their own choices, without undue pressure from others who might not fully understand their feelings or motivations.  

[The library] belongs to them whether they stay a week or a lifetime. Outsiders are allowed to use the library for research, but only if the priestesses approve [...]  

 

Choice. It had always been about my choice with him. And for others as well. Long before he'd ever learned the hard way about it.  

In Chapter 20, Feyre and Rhysand discuss the library of Velaris and the various priestesses who work there. Feyre has had negative experiences with priestesses such as Ianthe in the past, but Rhysand notes that he has created the library as a place of refuge for the priestesses, who have previously experienced traumatizing violence at the hands of others, often men. For Rhysand, it is important that the priestesses have absolute control over the library, deciding if, and when, to allow visitors to the library for research. In granting them this freedom to decide upon the library’s policies, Rhysand proves his deep respect for the independence and autonomy of the priestesses, which he believes is necessary for their healing. Feyre notes that “choice” has always been a paramount virtue for Rhysand. For him, an individual’s right to make decisions for themselves is fundamental, both in personal relationships and in politics.  

"If I had not met a shadowsinger, I would not have known that it is the family you make, not the one you are born into, that matters. I would not have known what it is to truly hope, even when the world tells you to despair." Azriel bowed his head in thanks. 

In Chapter 69, Rhysand delivers an inspiring speech to his Inner Circle prior to the final battle with Hybern, which will determine the future of Prythian. He praises each of his friends in turn, acknowledging his debts to others and affirming how highly he values their assistance. When he addresses Azriel, a “shadowsinger” whose magical powers are related to shadows, he expresses his gratitude that Azriel has taught him the true meaning of family. For Rhysand, who believes strongly that an individual must have the right to make decisions that affect their lives, family is not about biology, but rather about mutual trust, support, and love. Many of the members of Rhysand’s Inner Circle have very complicated relationships with the families into which they were born, but they have found a deeper sense of family in the bonds with each other. Here, Rhysand affirms the importance of chosen family, not just as a substitute for biological bonds, but as the truest form of family. Azriel, who was horribly mistreated by his own family, responds with gratitude to Rhysand’s kind words.