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The dreams were the only place it was safe to use her power now, and she longed for them.
Even before Alina amplifies her power with Rusalye’s scales, the heady potency of her first amplifier has created tension in her, both drawing her in and repulsing her. Alina avoids using her power because she knows that the Darkling can track her through it, and this loss makes her feel as if an essential part of herself has been cleaved from her. Far from seeking refuge from her power, she longs for it, and in the first section of the novel, Before, she had relied on Mal to keep her safe from herself. That refuge will not last long, especially as her power grows and the desire for more becomes increasingly tempting.
Why can a Grisha possess but one amplifier? I will answer this question instead: What is infinite? The universe and the greed of men.
Alina remembers this Grisha tenet in Chapter 5, when she realizes that the amplifiers she thought were the stuff of legend actually exist, and that, like Sankta Ilya, she could theoretically possess more than one. The question is whether she should. According to this Grisha teaching, the danger is too great, because the only thing greater than the universe is the human capacity to destroy it with greed. Alina has seen this firsthand in her time with the Darkling. She rationalizes her quest for the second and third amplifiers by arguing that with greater power she is better equipped to defeat the Darkling. However, greater power is equally likely to corrupt her, transforming her into something as evil as him.
I didn’t have to take hold of the power. It clung to me, as if it were grateful to be home.
Alina came into her Grisha powers later in life than others, and she had to work hard to become a strong summoner. Now, however, as Alina continues to amplify her power, she feels more at home with it, and it comes to her more naturally. In Chapter 6, when Alina takes Rusalye’s scales as her second amplifier, she requires no period of adjustment like she needed with Morozova’s collar. Instead, she feels immediately even more herself—but instead of a sense of relief, the feeling makes her hungry for more power. This hunger makes Alina more akin in some ways to the Darkling than to a virtuous leader it.
