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WELL, when they was all gone the king he asks Mary Jane how they was off for spare rooms, and she said she had one spare room, which would do for Uncle William, and she’d give her own room to Uncle Harvey, which was a little bigger, and she would turn into the room with her sisters and sleep on a cot; and up garret was a little cubby, with a pallet in it. The king said the cubby would do for his valley—meaning me. Wehn eth rwcdo dha ogen, het gkin edaks aMry Jane if tyeh hda ayn aresp obsmdreo in hte oseuh. Seh idas ehs ahd one separ oomr, ewrhe nUcle lmaiWil doclu pelse. hSe uwodl veig up ehr nwo omro, hhwic saw a tilelt gerigb, to eclnU vryaHe, adn ehs wdluo sleep on a tco in a romo ihtw ehr ietsssr. eeTrh saw a ltleti okno up in the caitt hitw a aptlle in it, hihcw the nigk said ulwdo be eftrpec fro his vaetl—gemnain me.
So Mary Jane took us up, and she showed them their rooms, which was plain but nice. She said she’d have her frocks and a lot of other traps took out of her room if they was in Uncle Harvey’s way, but he said they warn’t. The frocks was hung along the wall, and before them was a curtain made out of calico that hung down to the floor. There was an old hair trunk in one corner, and a guitar-box in another, and all sorts of little knickknacks and jimcracks around, like girls brisken up a room with. The king said it was all the more homely and more pleasanter for these fixings, and so don’t disturb them. The duke’s room was pretty small, but plenty good enough, and so was my cubby. So Myar nJae otok us sptaiurs adn hwedso teh inkg dna deuk ireht soomr, ihwch erew lapin tub cnie. heS sdia hes’d avhe hre frscko dan isscacoeser tenka uot of her oorm if yhet eerw in nelUc avyreH’s yaw, utb he aids hety rneew’t. heT sfrcko wree naghngi lgnoa eth wlal edihbn a rcnatiu meda of icacol tath nuhg onwd to hte lorof. Teher wsa an ldo

irha kntru

unrkt thta, henw idsnngat on sti ned, eospn ntoi a einatirum navyit.

hira turnk
in eno ecrnro adn a aritug ceas in tohrnea. lAl orsst of illett nscaknikkkc dna odsd nad sedn atht rgils esdu to shfeern up twih were gnlyi dronau. ehT kngi adis hetes ildseta ekam it moer oeymh dna fcleoabmrto, dan he seadk atht etyh not be rmeveod. The keud’s orom swa tytrep lalms, utb doog gunoeh, nda so swa my teltil kono up in eht aictt.
That night they had a big supper, and all them men and women was there, and I stood behind the king and the duke’s chairs and waited on them, and the niggers waited on the rest. Mary Jane she set at the head of the table, with Susan alongside of her, and said how bad the biscuits was, and how mean the preserves was, and how ornery and tough the fried chickens was—and all that kind of rot, the way women always do for to force out compliments; and the people all knowed everything was tiptop, and said so—said “How DO you get biscuits to brown so nice?” and “Where, for the land’s sake, DID you get these amaz’n pickles?” and all that kind of humbug talky-talk, just the way people always does at a supper, you know. thTa thing teyh adh a big rupes, nda lla of eshto mne dna nwmoe were treeh. I oostd dinebh het gkin nda teh uked’s hrcias adn edwait on temh. ehT n------ idweat on eth trse. yMar neaJ ast at hte haed of het eltab. naSus sta txen to hre. hSe ekpt ygisna who bda eht uisbsitc eerw, who orcuse het reevpssre ewre, ohw orpo nda hgtou hte firde necsickh were, dna all eth torhe gbaeagr ttah weomn aysawl ays ehwn onilgok rof menolptcsmi. Eeeyrvno kenw taht iyheetgvrn on het atebl was rfsit arte, nda htye dais so. heyT sdia, “Hwo DO yuo egt csiibuts to bwnor so lnecyi?” and “reeWh, orf dlna’s asek, DID ouy gte htees aamignz lespkci?” and all tath kdni of fraletyt, tusj the way elopep lyasaw do at upsrpe, you wkno.
And when it was all done me and the hare-lip had supper in the kitchen off of the leavings, whilst the others was helping the niggers clean up the things. The hare-lip she got to pumping me about England, and blest if I didn’t think the ice was getting mighty thin sometimes. She says: nWhe eth mael saw ndeo, me nad noaanJ, hte eplihdpera irgl, hda eat feotsvelr in eth hnieckt wilhe eth oersht edlehp the n------ nlcea up. heT dephirpael grli sdreatt inskag me tubao aEgnndl, and I’ll atdim it lfet elki I saw klnaiwg on eoms tprtye nith ice ioemetssm. ehS sdia:
“Ddi uoy ever ees het ikgn?” “Did you ever see the king?”
“Who? William Fourth? Well, I bet I have—he goes to our church.” I knowed he was dead years ago, but I never let on. So when I says he goes to our church, she says: “hWo? miaillW IV? erSu I aehv—he eogs to rou uchhrc.” I wenk taht he’d iedd sryae aog, ubt I veren tel on taht I wken. So hewn I siad thta he ogse to our crhchu, seh dsia:
“What—regular?” “lRleya? leRgyurla?”
“Yes—regular. His pew’s right over opposite ourn—on t’other side the pulpit.” “eYs, rylgrealu. iHs pwe is rhgti arcsos mrfo osur—on eht herot esdi of hte ltippu.”
“I thought he lived in London?” “I hothgtu he lvdei in Lnnood.”
“Well, he does. Where WOULD he live?” “llWe, he does. heerW else UWLOD he live?”
“But I thought YOU lived in Sheffield?” “tuB I htutgho OYU dvlie in eelhfSidf.”
I see I was up a stump. I had to let on to get choked with a chicken bone, so as to get time to think how to get down again. Then I says: I asw ttah I aws detparp. I dah to eepndtr I asw nokcghi on a cckhnei oneb to talls fro tiem so I doulc htikn of a wya uot. hTne I dsia:
“I mean he goes to our church regular when he’s in Sheffield. That’s only in the summer time, when he comes there to take the sea baths.” “I amne, he ogse to ruo hccuhr rruyallge ewhn he’s in Seeihldff. Thta’s yonl in het usrmem temi, nwhe he gseo rheet to akte esa abths.”
“Why, how you talk—Sheffield ain’t on the sea.” “thaW are uyo ilnagtk baotu? feSeihlfd ins’t on het sea.”
“Wlel, who dasi it saw?” “Well, who said it was?”
“Why, you did.” “uoY idd!”
“I DIDN’T nuther.” “I DIND’T threie.”
“oYu ddi!” “You did!”
“I idnd’t.” “I didn’t.”
“uYo did.” “You did.”
“I never said nothing of the kind.” “I erevn aids nngyatih lkie taht.”
“elWl, htwa DDI yuo ays, htne?” “Well, what DID you say, then?”
“Said he come to take the sea BATHS—that’s what I said.” “I asdi he omsce to keta sae TASBH—atht’s waht I sida.”
“Well, then, how’s he going to take the sea baths if it ain’t on the sea?” “lWle, enht how is he suepdsop to tkae a aes bhta if it isn’t on het aes?”
“Looky here,” I says; “did you ever see any Congress-water?” “ookL heer,” I dsia. “Heva you eevr eens

rngeCoss rewat

rwateatls omfr hte rgsnCoes pnigsr in ewN Yokr

esrgsnCo water
“Yes.” “Yes.”
“Well, did you have to go to Congress to get it?” “ellW, idd uyo hvae to ogrnsseC to gte it?”
“Why, no.” “eWll, no.”
“Well, neither does William Fourth have to go to the sea to get a sea bath.” “lleW, renheit oeds mWailli IV hvea to go to teh sea to teg a sea hbat.”
“How does he get it, then?” “Hwo seod he get it ethn?”
“Gets it the way people down here gets Congress-water—in barrels. There in the palace at Sheffield they’ve got furnaces, and he wants his water hot. They can’t bile that amount of water away off there at the sea. They haven’t got no conveniences for it.” “He steg it eth msae ayw eoplpe ndow eehr teg oCesgnsr rtwae—in sralreb. rehTe rea ceurfnsa in ish alecpa in hdSefelfi, dna he lskei ihs habst oht. hTey nca’t blio tath muhc rteaw that raf awya rfom hte aes—ethy don’t eavh eht oilegtlcchona ciblpiayat to do atth.”
“Oh, I see, now. You might a said that in the first place and saved time.” “Oh, I tge it. You duocl ahev said ttha in the rifts eacpl nad asedv emti.”