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Oh, there be players that I have seen play and heard others
praise (and that highly), not to speak it profanely, that,
neither having th' accent of Christians nor the gait of
Christian, pagan, nor man, have so strutted and bellowed
that I have thought some of nature’s journeymen had
made
men and not made them well, they imitated humanity so
abominably.
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I’ve seen actors who are highly praised, but
who—not to be too rude here—can’t
even talk or walk like human beings. They bellow and strut about
like weird animals that were made to look like men, but very
badly.
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FIRST PLAYER I hope we have reformed that indifferently with us, sir.
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FIRST PLAYER I hope we’ve corrected that fault pretty well in our
company, sir.
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HAMLET O, reform it altogether! And let those that play your clowns
speak no more than is set down for them, for there be of
them that will themselves laugh to set on some quantity of
barren spectators to laugh too, though in the meantime
some necessary question of the play be then to be
considered. That’s villainous, and shows a most pitiful
ambition in the fool that uses it. Go, make you ready.
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HAMLET Oh, correct it completely. Make sure that the clowns do not
ad-lib, since some of them will make certain dumb audience members
laugh mindlessly at them, while an important issue in the play needs
to be addressed. It’s bad behavior for an actor, anyway,
and displays a pitiful ambition to hog the limelight on
stage.
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Exeunt PLAYERS
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The PLAYERS
exit.
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Enter POLONIUS,
ROSENCRANTZ, and GUILDENSTERN
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POLONIUS,
GUILDENSTERN, and ROSENCRANTZ
enter.
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How now, my lord! Will the king hear this piece of work?
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So, my lord, will the king be attending the performance?
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POLONIUS And the queen too, and that presently.
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POLONIUS Yes, he will, and the queen as well.
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HAMLET Bid the players make haste.
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HAMLET Tell the actors to hurry.
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Exit POLONIUS
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POLONIUS exits.
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45Will you two help to hasten them?
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Will you two help them get ready?
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ROSENCRANTZ Ay, my
lord.
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ROSENCRANTZ Yes, my lord.
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Exeunt ROSENCRANTZ and
GUILDENSTERN
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ROSENCRANTZ and
GUILDENSTERN exit.
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HAMLET What ho, Horatio!
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HAMLET Well, hello there, Horatio!
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Enter HORATIO
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HORATIO enters.
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