No Fear Shakespeare: Henry IV, Part 2: Act 5 Scene 1

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Henry IV, Part 2

William Shakespeare

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Original Text

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Original Text	Modern Text
Enter SHALLOW , FALSTAFF , PAGE , and BARDOLPH	Enter SHALLOW , FALSTAFF , PAGE , and BARDOLPH
SHALLOW By cock and pie, sir, you shall not away tonight.—What, Davy, I say!	SHALLOW By cock and pie, sir, you shall not away tonight.—What, Davy, I say!
FALSTAFF You must excuse me, Master Robert Shallow.	FALSTAFF You must excuse me, Master Robert Shallow.
SHALLOW I will not excuse you. You shall not be excused. Excuses 5 shall not be admitted. There is no excuse shall serve. You shall not be excused.—Why, Davy!	SHALLOW I will not excuse you. You shall not be excused. Excuses shall not be admitted. There is no excuse shall serve. You shall not be excused.—Why, Davy!
Enter DAVY	Enter DAVY
DAVY Here, sir.	DAVY Here, sir.
SHALLOW Davy, Davy, Davy, Davy, let me see, Davy, let me see, Davy, let me see. Yea, marry, William cook, bid him come 10 hither.—Sir John, you shall not be excused.	SHALLOW Davy, Davy, Davy, Davy, let me see, Davy, let me see, Davy, let me see. Yea, marry, William cook, bid him come hither.—Sir John, you shall not be excused.
DAVY Marry, sir, thus: those precepts cannot be served. And again, sir, shall we sow the hade land with wheat?	DAVY Marry, sir, thus: those precepts cannot be served. And again, sir, shall we sow the hade land with wheat?
SHALLOW With red wheat, Davy. But for William cook, are there no young pigeons?	SHALLOW With red wheat, Davy. But for William cook, are there no young pigeons?
DAVY 15 Yes, sir. Here is now the smith’s note for shoeing and plow irons.	DAVY Yes, sir. Here is now the smith’s note for shoeing and plow irons.
SHALLOW Let it be cast and paid.—Sir John, you shall not be excused.	SHALLOW Let it be cast and paid.—Sir John, you shall not be excused.
DAVY Now, sir, a new link to the bucket must needs be had. And, sir, do you mean to stop any of William’s wages about the 20 sack he lost the other day at Hinckley Fair?	DAVY Now, sir, a new link to the bucket must needs be had. And, sir, do you mean to stop any of William’s wages about the sack he lost the other day at Hinckley Fair?
SHALLOW He shall answer it. Some pigeons, Davy, a couple of short- legged hens, a joint of mutton, and any pretty little tiny kickshaws, tell William cook.	SHALLOW He shall answer it. Some pigeons, Davy, a couple of short- legged hens, a joint of mutton, and any pretty little tiny kickshaws, tell William cook.
DAVY Doth the man of war stay all night, sir?	DAVY Doth the man of war stay all night, sir?
SHALLOW Yea, Davy. I will use him well. A friend i' th' court is better 25 than a penny in purse. Use his men well, Davy, for they are arrant knaves and will backbite.	SHALLOW Yea, Davy. I will use him well. A friend i' th' court is better than a penny in purse. Use his men well, Davy, for they are arrant knaves and will backbite.
DAVY No worse than they are back-bitten, sir, for they have marvellous foul linen.	DAVY No worse than they are back-bitten, sir, for they have marvellous foul linen.
SHALLOW Well-conceited, Davy. About thy business, Davy.	SHALLOW Well-conceited, Davy. About thy business, Davy.
DAVY 30 I beseech you, sir, to countenance William Visor of Woncot against Clement Perkes o' th' hill.	DAVY I beseech you, sir, to countenance William Visor of Woncot against Clement Perkes o' th' hill.
SHALLOW There is many complaints, Davy, against that Visor. That Visor is an arrant knave, on my knowledge.	SHALLOW There is many complaints, Davy, against that Visor. That Visor is an arrant knave, on my knowledge.
DAVY I grant your Worship that he is a knave, sir, but yet, God 35 forbid, sir, but a knave should have some countenance at his friend’s request. An honest man, sir, is able to speak for himself when a knave is not. I have served your Worship truly, sir, this eight years; an if I cannot once or twice in a quarter bear out a knave against an honest man, I have	DAVY I grant your Worship that he is a knave, sir, but yet, God forbid, sir, but a knave should have some countenance at his friend’s request. An honest man, sir, is able to speak for himself when a knave is not. I have served your Worship truly, sir, this eight years; an if I cannot once or twice in a quarter bear out a knave against an honest man, I have
40 a very little credit with your Worship. The knave is mine honest friend, sir; therefore I beseech you let him be countenanced.	a very little credit with your Worship. The knave is mine honest friend, sir; therefore I beseech you let him be countenanced.
SHALLOW Go to, I say he shall have no wrong. Look about, Davy.	SHALLOW Go to, I say he shall have no wrong. Look about, Davy.
Exit DAVY	Exit DAVY
Where are you, Sir John? Come, come, come, off with your 45 boots.—Give me your hand, Master Bardolph.	Where are you, Sir John? Come, come, come, off with your boots.—Give me your hand, Master Bardolph.
BARDOLPH I am glad to see your Worship.	BARDOLPH I am glad to see your Worship.
SHALLOW I thank thee with all my heart, kind Master Bardolph, (to the PAGE) and welcome, my tall fellow.—Come, Sir John.	SHALLOW I thank thee with all my heart, kind Master Bardolph, (to the PAGE) and welcome, my tall fellow.—Come, Sir John.
FALSTAFF I’ll follow you, good Master Robert Shallow.	FALSTAFF I’ll follow you, good Master Robert Shallow.
Exit SHALLOW	Exit SHALLOW
50 Bardolph, look to our horses.	Bardolph, look to our horses.
Exeunt BARDOLPH and PAGE	Exeunt BARDOLPH and PAGE
If I were sawed into quantities, I should make four dozen of such bearded hermits' staves as Master Shallow. It is a wonderful thing to see the semblable coherence of his men’s spirits and his. They, by observing of him, do bear 55 themselves like foolish justices; he, by conversing with them, is turned into a justice-like servingman. Their spirits are so married in conjunction with the participation of society that they flock together in consent like so many wild geese. If I had a suit to Master Shallow, I would humor his 60 men with the imputation of being near their master;if to his men, I would curry with Master Shallow that no man could better command his servants. It is certain that either wise bearing or ignorant carriage is caught, as men take diseases, one of another. Therefore let men take heed of their 65 company. I will devise matter enough out of this Shallow to	If I were sawed into quantities, I should make four dozen of such bearded hermits' staves as Master Shallow. It is a wonderful thing to see the semblable coherence of his men’s spirits and his. They, by observing of him, do bear themselves like foolish justices; he, by conversing with them, is turned into a justice-like servingman. Their spirits are so married in conjunction with the participation of society that they flock together in consent like so many wild geese. If I had a suit to Master Shallow, I would humor his men with the imputation of being near their master;if to his men, I would curry with Master Shallow that no man could better command his servants. It is certain that either wise bearing or ignorant carriage is caught, as men take diseases, one of another. Therefore let men take heed of their company. I will devise matter enough out of this Shallow to
keep Prince Harry in continual laughter the wearing out of six fashions, which is four terms, or two actions, and a' shall laugh without intervallums. O, it is much that a lie with a slight oath and a jest with a sad brow will do with a fellow that never had the ache in his shoulders. O, you shall see him laugh till his face be like a wet cloak ill laid up.	keep Prince Harry in continual laughter the wearing out of six fashions, which is four terms, or two actions, and a' shall laugh without intervallums. O, it is much that a lie with a slight oath and a jest with a sad brow will do with a fellow that never had the ache in his shoulders. O, you shall see him laugh till his face be like a wet cloak ill laid up.
SHALLOW (within) Sir John.	SHALLOW (within) Sir John.
FALSTAFF I come, Master Shallow; I come, Master Shallow.	FALSTAFF I come, Master Shallow; I come, Master Shallow.
Exit	Exit