Henry IV Part 2

by: William Shakespeare

Original Text

Modern Text

CHIEF JUSTICE

I talk not of his Majesty. You would not come when I sent
95for you.

CHIEF JUSTICE

I’m not talking about the King. You didn’t come when I sent for you.

FALSTAFF

And I hear, moreover, his Highness is fallen into this same
whoreson apoplexy.

FALSTAFF

And I also hear that the King has fallen into a terrible paralysis.

CHIEF JUSTICE

Well, God mend him. I pray you let me speak with you.

CHIEF JUSTICE

Well, God give him a speedy recovery. Please, let me speak with you.

FALSTAFF

This apoplexy, as I take it, is a kind of lethargy, an ’t please
100your Lordship, a kind of sleeping in the blood, a whoreson
tingling.

FALSTAFF

His paralysis is, as I understand it, a kind of lethargy, if it please you. It’s a sleepiness in the blood, a nasty tingling.

CHIEF JUSTICE

What tell you me of it? Be it as it is.

CHIEF JUSTICE

Why are you telling me this? Let it be.

FALSTAFF

It hath its original from much grief, from study, and
perturbation of the brain. I have read the cause of his effects
105in Galen. It is a kind of deafness.

FALSTAFF

It comes from heavy sadness; from too much reading, and too much thinking. I read about it in the reference books: it’s a kind of deafness.

CHIEF JUSTICE

I think you are fallen into the disease, for you hear not what
I say to you.

CHIEF JUSTICE

I think you must have that disease as well, because you’re not hearing a word I’m saying.

FALSTAFF

Very well, my lord, very well. Rather, an ’t please you, it is
the disease of not listening, the malady of not marking, that
110I am troubled withal.

FALSTAFF

Very likely, my lord, very likely. But actually, sir, I have the not-listening disease; I have the not-paying-attention sickness.

CHIEF JUSTICE

To punish you by the heels would amend the attention of
your ears, and I care not if I do become your physician.

CHIEF JUSTICE

The cure for that illness would be to put you in shackles, and I wouldn’t mind being your doctor.

FALSTAFF

I am as poor as Job, my lord, but not so patient. Your
Lordship may minister the potion of imprisonment to me in
115respect of poverty, but how should I be your patient to follow
your prescriptions, the wise may make some dram of a
scruple, or indeed a scruple itself.

FALSTAFF

I may be as poor as

Job

In the Bible, Job patiently withstood a series of hardships set on him by God.

Job
, but I’m not as patient. You may be able to throw me in jail because of my poverty, but some people might have slight reservations about that.