Life According to Ginger: Facebook is Surprisingly Insightful

Life According to Ginger: Facebook is Surprisingly Insightful

By Miss Marm

Three out of my five weeks of winter break are complete. Still have very little to do (I’m only getting five hours of work a week now), still bored out of my mind. All apologies to the jealous high schoolers.

Thanks for the book suggestions last week! I’m definitely going to start with the Hunger Games trilogy (The Book Thief and The Princess Bride were well recommended; they were both excellent).

Unfortunately, my friend who was going to loan them to me… well… we don’t really get things done when we’re around each other. I texted her and she said she’d bring them over (she didn’t). I went to her house the next day, saying I would grab them (I didn’t. Rock Band distracted me). You see, this is what happens when college students get bored. We lose our ability to accomplish ANYTHING. This can actually be well documented by facebook.

I would say that status updates have gone up about 72 percent among college-age students over the course of winter break. You are free to take or dismiss that statistic as completely made up. Most of the influx of updates says something akin to, “I’m bored,” “anyone up to party tonight?” or “I forgot exactly how little this godforsaken cesspool of a town has to do in it.” You see, it bothers me when people post useless things like that. I know you’re bored. You just “liked” everything I did on facebook today. You don’t have to tell me you have nothing to do. Go read a book or write a SparkLife post. Or at least think up something a little cleverer for a status.

I try to keep my facebook use to a minimum so I can at least pretend to have a life. But there are people who don’t even pretend anymore. Like my friend who, at 1 in the morning, posted a status about watching Glee alone (poor guy). Or my other friend who posts a minimum of 6 hipster songs throughout the day that he has found through idle youtube surfing. Or my other friend who posts Pink Floyd lyrics. You can’t REALLY listen to a Pink Floyd song without listening to the entire album. Or so he says. My friend actually posted an 8-MINUTE video to my wall, documenting her interpretation of Bieber’s “Baby.” It was quite insightful and sarcastic, and also created at 1 in the morning. I think she wins prize for “bored enough to listen to Justin Bieber.”

Boredom has also resulted in weird trends of pseudo-competition. I played three hours of Texas Hold ‘Em today. By “play,” of course, I mean, “sit on the side and make snarky comments.” I think I almost know how to play, though. Cards that match are good, right? Like Uno? You can match either the colors or the numbers and you’re good? I think that was the general gist of it. I also played around three hours of Pokemon Monopoly. I know exactly how cool I am. I was Charmander, for the record, and the first to lose to Blastoise. That was two hours into the game, when Blastoise had three monopolies, houses on all of them, and around 3,000 Pokemon Dollars. By 2.5 hours, he had four monopolies, with hotels on every one, and Clefairy and Pikachu had half their properties mortgaged. It took them about another 45 minutes to lose, because Clefairy had developed a weird competitive drive that I’m sure had something to do with this freakishly long break. He refused to quit, and I was a little bit scared of (and annoyed by) his frenzy. So far, no smack talk has been posted on the facebook, but that might be because the time he took to lose put him way past curfew.

Ginger’s Song of the Week: Here is a gypsy-punk song about going crazy and wearing purple all the time. It’s not entirely in English.

Anyone else hanging out on FB 24/7 these days?

Topics: facebook, boredom, winter break

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