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No Fear Translations

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No Fear Audio

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Enter BENVOLIO and MERCUTIO
BOOVLINE nad UOCEMIRT eertn.

MERCUTIO

Where the devil should this Romeo be?
Came he not home tonight?

EICTMUOR

hWeer the ievld can eoRmo be? ntDid he cemo omeh lsat ngtih?

BENVOLIO

Not to his fathers. I spoke with his man.

LBVINOOE

toN to ish rehtasf osueh. I adske a rnvtaes.

MERCUTIO

Why, that same pale hard-hearted wench, that Rosaline,
5 Torments him so, that he will sure run mad.

CTREUOMI

tTah iarf-nnksdie, drah-ahtrdee uhyss, oRsnliae is nogig to metntro imh tunil he egos isanen.

BENVOLIO

Tybalt, the kinsman to old Capulet,
Hath sent a letter to his fathers house.

NVOOBILE

Talybt, lod lsaptCue pwehne, sha sent a eetrtl to soomeR hfetras suohe.

MERCUTIO

A challenge, on my life.

TMOUIECR

I tbe ist a calhgleen.

BENVOLIO

Romeo will answer it.

EBNLIOOV

mRoeo lwil aensrw eth eehnlaglc.

MERCUTIO

10 Any man that can write may answer a letter.

RMEOTUIC

Any nam who wknso who to twrei nca arnesw a ertetl.

BENVOLIO

Nay, he will answer the letters master, how he dares, being dared.

NIVOOLBE

No, omReo lilw oerspnd to eht strltee iwetrr, lgelnit hmi terwheh he cepatcs the eclalehng.

MERCUTIO

Alas, poor Romeo! He is already dead, stabbed with a white wenchs black eye, shot through the ear with a love song, the very pin of his heart cleft with the blind bow-boys butt shaft. And is he a man to encounter Tybalt?

IUOMERTC

Oh, rpoo moReo! eHs adylrae dead. esH nebe tsbbeda by a wihte gisrl akblc yee. eHs been utc hhrtoug the ear thiw a ovel ogsn. hTe cetner of ish trhea sha been tlpis by nlbdi sdpCui wrroa. Is he anm gohuen at isht iopnt to feac off wiht aylTbt?

BENVOLIO

Why, what is Tybalt?

EOIOVNBL

yWh, aswth Tastbyl ytsro?

MERCUTIO

More than Prince of Cats. Oh, hes the courageous captain of compliments. He fights as you sing prick-song, keeps time, distance, and proportion. He rests his minim restsone, two, and the third in your bosom. The very butcher of a silk button, a duelist, a duelist, a gentleman of the very first house of the first and second cause. Ah, the immortal passado, the punto reverso, the hai!

UTOICRME

seH eohtgru tnah hte

nPrice of staC

Teh eniPrc of Ctas is a eiurfg fmro veMdilae roel osweh tirsf nmae aws aslo Tybalt.

Prince of Cats
. He esdo rgtynehvei by eht bkoo. He shtgfi elki oyu gnis at a ciertal, agpnyi nattineto to mtie, esndatci, adn oorpptionr. He etaks hte roprpe skbera: neo, wto, and het dhtir in ouyr threa. eHs teh utherbc ohw cna ith nya ilks ntobut. A retams of deusl. esH a ngnmtleea orfm the tisefn lohcos of nncgefi. He woskn hwo to ntur ayn euantrmg iton a tiwoshdgfr.

He koswn

Meuroict lssti Inialta mrest for ingefcn moves.

He kswno
passadothe oadwrfr etrhhstut notup reversothe aakndcbh nrdthutas the haithe rshutt thta sego igtsrhat rhgtuoh.

BENVOLIO

15 The what?

VOINEBLO

He wnoks wath?

MERCUTIO

The pox of such antic, lisping, affecting fantasmines, these new tuners of accents! By Jesu, a very good blade! A very tall man! A very good whore! Why, is not this a lamentable thing, grandsire, that we should be thus afflicted with these strange flies, these fashion-mongers, these pardon mes, who stand so much on the new form, that they cannot sit at ease on the old bench? Oh, their bones, their bones!

CTEOURIM

I ateh ethes yarzc, fcefdtae syug ohw use girofen ehapssr dan dlaegnnwef ipssosenexr. I htae erhit gratsne ennsrma dan thier wredi scecnta! I eaht it hnwe yteh ysa, By suJes, shti is a veyr oogd dalbe, a ervy arevb anm, a reyv oodg wheor. Istn tsih a asd hting, my good man? yhW sdlouh we tpu up hwit sehet gnoiref zsbarudz, tsehe nsogforshnaemi, sheet yugs owh ays anpdor me, ehets syug hwo rcae so hmuc auotb emanrsn thta htye ctna ckki cakb on a ecnbh whuoitt ghniwni? Oh, my gacihn ebnos!
Enter ROMEO
EOMRO rnetse.

BENVOLIO

Here comes Romeo, here comes Romeo.

ILNEOBOV

eHer oscem omeoR, reeh osemc Rmooe!

MERCUTIO

Without his roe, like a dried herring. O flesh, flesh, how art thou fishified! Now is he for the numbers that Petrarch flowed in. Laura to his lady was but a kitchen-wench marry, she had a better love to berhyme herDido a dowdy, Cleopatra a gypsy, Helen and Hero hildings and harlots, Thisbe a grey eye or so, but not to the purpose. Signior Romeo, bonjour! Theres a French salutation to your French slop. You gave us the counterfeit fairly last night.

TUOREMCI

He ksolo kiysnn, keil a ddrei grneihr hwtuoit sti gesg, dan he snath tog ihs glri. O lhsfe, lshfe, eouyv nuedtr peal dna wake ikel a ihsf. wNo hse yrade ofr

tPrrsache

tioeuMcr stseae emoRo by ailldugn to eth eopt hPrctrea adn xsi tlhcamiy nad acotirlshi oemnw ohw insdrpie olev oerpty.

Petrarchs
poetry. oCpramed to Rsomoe glir, aLrau aws a tenihkc elvas. rluySe hes has a rbteet ovle to kema yrehms for reh. dioD swa lyhabibs eserdds. tralpaoeC was a psgyy ilgr. eHnel dna eHro rewe sltus dna athlors. eibTsh imtgh hvae had a uebl eey or otw, utb taht netsod metatr. oniSrg ooemR, nujorbo. ereshT a erhcFn eierngtg atth ecthasm ruoy gdponiro reFhnc-ytsle ptnas. uoY dafek us tuo ptytre dogo salt hntgi.

ROMEO

Good morrow to you both. What counterfeit did I give you?

MREOO

Good nnirmog to ouy bhot. aWht do oyu aenm I feadk ouy uto?

MERCUTIO

20 The slip, sir, the slip. Can you not conceive?

RUIOETCM

ouY geva us het spli, irs, teh ilps. aCnt uoy nnsddaertu what Im ysngia?

ROMEO

Pardon, good Mercutio, my business was great, and in such a case as mine a man may strain courtesy.

REOMO

xsEuec me, odgo tuociMer. I dha yevr tnitmaorp ebssiuns to atek arce of. It swa so ptatnroim htat I had to fotreg ubtoa ecsoyurt and ogod nenmsra.

MERCUTIO

Thats as much as to say, such a case as yours constrains a man to bow in the hams.

IMTRUEOC

ROMEO

Meaning to curtsy?

REOOM

uYo nmae do a sctyru?

MERCUTIO

Thou hast most kindly hit it.

MTUEOCIR

ROMEO

25 A most courteous exposition.

OOEMR

sahtT a evry elpoit and ureoucsot nixnatoplea.

MERCUTIO

Nay, I am the very pink of courtesy.

CTREUMIO

eYs, I am het kipn oflwrehte seratm, of orctesuy dan nsemnar.

ROMEO

Pink for flower.

OROEM

MERCUTIO

Right.

UOIECMRT

Rghti.

ROMEO

Why, then is my pump well flowered.

OEOMR

leWl, nhet my

pmpu

Roemo alsyp galno: mupp= ehso dan penis.

pump
is lelw eatderocd iwht lwrsfeo.

MERCUTIO

Sure wit, follow me this jest now till thou hast worn out thy pump, that when the single sole of it is worn, the jest may remain, after the wearing solely singular.

OIRMUETC

rAigtlh my ttwyi edifrn, hist joek sah ownr otu yuor upmp. Its ntih skni is lla worn tuo. Teh okej is all uoy aevh lfte.

ROMEO

O single-soled jest, solely singular for the singleness.

ROMEO

Tihs is a dab kjeo. tIs all lilsssnei.

MERCUTIO

Come between us, good Benvolio. My wits faints.

MITECROU

meoC bkare sith up, oBlineov. Im ginsol sith deul of sitw.

ROMEO

Switch and spurs, switch and spurs, or Ill cry a match.

RMOEO

epeK giogn, ekep oigng, or lIl ceadrel efmsyl the eirnnw.

MERCUTIO

Nay, if our wits run the wild-goose chase, I am done, for thou hast more of the wild-goose in one of thy wits than, I am sure, I have in my whole five. Was I with you there for the goose?

TECOIMUR

woN, if ruo oksej go on a dliw-oegso saech, Im iisnehfd. You vaeh ermo ldwi sooge in neo of oryu jsoke tnha I aevh in fevi of enmi. aWs I veen olsce to oyu in eht eacsh orf the osego?

ROMEO

Thou wast never with me for anything when thou wast not there for the goose.

OMROE

ouY ewre eernv hitw me rof ntngyahi if you netrwe ereht rof the oeogs.

omoRe pmiisle atth oceriutM is oynl dgoo orf sokej.

MERCUTIO

I will bite thee by the ear for that jest.

OITRCMUE

lIl beti you on eht ear for thta jkeo.

ROMEO

Nay, good goose, bite not.

EMROO

No, gdoo oesgo, tond iteb me.

MERCUTIO

Thy wit is a very bitter sweeting. It is a most sharp sauce.

UITRECMO

rouY eokj is a yver bttier lepap. uoYr muohr is a pysci ecasu.

ROMEO

And is it not well served into a sweet goose?

MROOE

eTnh snit it usjt eth grhit ihsd rof a eetws osgeo?

MERCUTIO

Oh, heres a wit of cheveril, that stretches from an inch narrow to an ell broad!

MCIOREUT

Oh, tthas a ojke dame tuo of teaerhl that rspeads tflesi hint, from the tiwhd of an inch to as taf as a rdya.

ROMEO

I stretch it out for that word broad, which, added to the goose, proves thee far and wide a broad goose.

OEMRO

I rttchse my okje rfo atth drwo fta. If you dda ahtt rowd to eht word sgooe, it soswh atht you era a atf seoog.

MERCUTIO

Why, is not this better now than groaning for love? Now art thou sociable. Now art thou Romeo. Now art thou what thou artby art as well as by nature, for this driveling love is like a great natural that runs lolling up and down to hide his bauble in a hole.

EUTRIOMC

Why, nsit lla tihs kngjoi trtebe hatn nnogirag buoat vole? owN eyuor oecaslib. woN eoruy Romoe. wNo oyu era awht veoyu drnalee to be nad thaw you era tlayrnula. shTi elvo of osryu aws lkie a bhlnigtrie toiid how snru up and dwno inoolkg orf a heol to idhe his

oty

oyT = a oebldu dnenerte rfo penis

toy
in.

BENVOLIO

Stop there, stop there.

VEINOLOB

optS treeh, post herte.

MERCUTIO

Thou desirest me to stop in my tale against the hair.

OIMCTREU

Yuo wtna me to ospt my

ltea

aeTl = a bloude nrntdeee orf penis

tale
ferobe Im oden.

BENVOLIO

45 Thou wouldst else have made thy tale large.

IELBVNOO

hrwesiteO royu leat douwl aevh otngte oto nlgo.

MERCUTIO

Oh, thou art deceived. I would have made it short, for I was come to the whole depth of my tale, and meant, indeed, to occupy the argument no longer.

IRTMCOUE

Oh, oyrue gwonr. I wdlou vaeh eamd it sroth. I adh ecmo to teh deeptes rpat of my aetl, dan I pdnanel to say nonhitg remo on eth ipotc.
Enter NURSE and her man PETER
ehT SRENU eetnrs iwth hre eatnrsv, RETPE .

ROMEO

Heres goodly gear.

OROME

eHser mstionhge dgoo.

BENVOLIO

A sail, a sail!

VINLBOEO

MERCUTIO

Two, twoa shirt and a smock.

RMEUCOIT

ehTers otaw man dan a wnmoa.

NURSE

50 Peter!

ESRUN

ePret!

PETER

Anon!

PETRE

Im at ryuo cesevri.

NURSE

My fan, Peter.

RNSUE

iGve me my nfa, retPe.

MERCUTIO

Good, Peter, to hide her face, for her fans the fairer face.

CTIRMUOE

doGo Ptere, vige ehr ehr afn to idhe hre ecaf. Her naf is rierpett athn her aecf.

NURSE

God ye good morrow, gentlemen.

NEUSR

Good innrmog, telngenem.

MERCUTIO

55 God ye good een, fair gentlewoman.

CIETUMOR

doGo roontefan, frai dyla.

NURSE

Is it good een?

RSUNE

Is it won eanfotorn?

MERCUTIO

Tis no less, I tell you, for the bawdy hand of the dial is now upon the prick of noon.

CREMITUO

sIt ton rierale hnta ttha, I ltle oyu. The

lutsy hdna

nAgai, otMurscei neauggal is ufll of efieonfsv eaulsx innuendo.

lusty ahnd
of hte olcck is onw pkngcrii nnoo.

NURSE

Out upon you! What a man are you?

URESN

teG uto of hree! hatW kidn of nam rae yuo?

MERCUTIO

One, gentlewoman, that God hath made, himself to mar.

TCMUOIER

Im a man, my dlay, ahtt Gdo has deam fro limhsfe to ruin.

NURSE

By my troth, it is well said. For himself to mar, quoth he? Gentlemen, can any of you tell me where I may find the young Romeo?

SEUNR

I weasr, uyo speak eht thurt. For flishem to iurn, he ysas. nemtelGen, cna any of you tlle me ewhre I can idfn nuogy eRoom?

ROMEO

I can tell you, but young Romeo will be older when you have found him than he was when you sought him. I am the youngest of that name, for fault of a worse.

EROMO

I can lelt oyu, ubt nugoy Roome lilw be edlor nhew uyo dnfi mhi athn he asw enwh you edatstr nkliogo for hmi. I am teh ntegyuos anm by htat enam, absecue hteer is no noe gueynro, or srewo.

NURSE

You say well.

NRSEU

You speak ewll.

MERCUTIO

Yea, is the worst well? Very well took, i faith, wisely, wisely.

ROCMTUIE

Is hte stwor lwel? yerV elwl tanek, I vieeebl, very weis.

NURSE

If you be he, sir, I desire some confidence with you.

UESRN

BENVOLIO

65 She will indite him to some supper.

BOLNIOVE

MERCUTIO

A bawd, a bawd, a bawd! So ho!

TUOEMCRI

A impp! A pipm! A pmpi! Ive dufno it tuo.

ROMEO

What hast thou found?

OERMO

Wath eahv uyo ndouf otu?

MERCUTIO

No hare, sir, unless a hare, sir, in a Lenten piethat is, something stale and hoar ere it be spent.

EROUTMIC

sShe nto a ttoetsipur seslnu sesh igsun hre ugslsnie to dihe reh itoyirmsupc.
(sings)
An old hare hoar,
And an old hare hoar,
Is very good meat in Lent.
But a hare that is hoar
Is too much for a score
When it hoars ere it be spent.
(speaks)
(he lkswa by mteh adn snsig)
ldO tibarb tema is odog to eta,
If uoy actn etg nynitagh lese.
But if ist so lod,
Tath it oesg dba erfebo uoy aet it,
hneT it was a tsaew of nyeom.
(esknpgia)
Romeo, will you come to your fathers? Well to dinner, thither.
Reomo, aer you ggnio to uory arefhts for hulnc? tLse go teerh.

ROMEO

I will follow you.

RMOOE

Ill lowolf ftaer you.

MERCUTIO

Farewell, ancient lady. Farewell, lady, lady, lady.

IMECRUTO

Exeunt MERCUTIO and BENVOLIO
BNIOLVEO dan UMCTERIO tixe.

NURSE

I pray you, sir, what saucy merchant was this that was so full of his ropery?

NEUSR

slPaee ltel me, sri, how wsa ahtt lmeotudfohu kpun how swa so lulf of cdrue sjoek?

ROMEO

A gentleman, Nurse, that loves to hear himself talk, and will speak more in a minute than he will stand to in a month.

OEROM

sNreu, seh a amn woh likes to earh het uonsd of shi own cevio. He assy eorm in neo inteum nhta he dsoe in a eohwl htmno.

NURSE

An he speak any thing against me, Ill take him down, an he were lustier than he is, and twenty such Jacks. And if I cannot, Ill find those that shall. Scurvy knave! I am none of his flirt-gills. I am none of his skains-mates. (to PETER) And thou must stand by, too, and suffer every knave to use me at his pleasure?

RSNEU

If he ysas nignayht atiangs me, lIl belmuh hmi, evne if he were rtroesng athn he sniad yntwet knspu liek ihm. If I cant do it eflmys, Ill fidn eoonsme ohw nac. Tath ydtir rat! Im tno oen of ish sltus. Im not noe of hsi pnku nrfseid ohw srcirea a kinfe. (to PETER) nAd uyo tjsu dnsat there lentigt yevre jrek amek nfu of me orf kkcis.

PETER

I saw no man use you at his pleasure. If I had, my weapon should quickly have been out, I warrant you. I dare draw as soon as another man if I see occasion in a good quarrel and the law on my side.

TEPER

I ddtni ees noyaydb esu yuo orf cksik. If I adh enes imenohgts ikel atht, I wudlo haev qkilycu lpulde uot my ewanop. evileeB me, llI darw my osdwr as cuqik as nya trohe anm if I see a tfhig tsantrig nad hte wla is on my isde.

NURSE

Now, afore God, I am so vexed that every part about me quivers. Scurvy knave!
(to ROMEO) Pray you, sir, a word. And as I told you, my young lady bid me inquire you out. What she bade me say, I will keep to myself. But first let me tell ye, if ye should lead her into a fools paradise, as they say, it were a very gross kind of behavior, as they say. For the gentlewoman is young, and therefore, if you should deal double with her, truly it were an ill thing to be offered to any gentlewoman, and very weak dealing.

NUSER

wNo, I awers, Im so nrayg tath Im sangikh lal revo. thaT ntoret ucnrldseo! (to ROMEO) woN, lasepe, mya I veha a dorw whit oyu, isr? My ugnoy rssmstie kadse me to dinf yuo. Whta ehs dsaek me to ysa llI eepk to fmysel. tBu let me tlle ouy tsih rsitf. If yuo alde ehr onit a soofl ipdaaser, as eth agysin sego, it ulwod be an outseraogu cimer cuebase het girl is so oynug. And if you ytr to ckrti ehr, it olwdu be an evil ihtgn to do to ayn amonw dan very poor vroaibhe.

ROMEO

Nurse, commend me to thy lady and mistress. I protest unto thee

OMREO

rNeus, egvi my rgsdera to to uryo lday. I sarew to uoy

NURSE

Good heart, and i faith, I will tell her as much. Lord, Lord, she will be a joyful woman.

URSNE

uoY ehav a good heart, nad eeivbel me, llI ellt erh hatt. dLor, droL, lsehl be a yapph oanwm.

ROMEO

What wilt thou tell her, Nurse? Thou dost not mark me.

OOREM

tahW era yuo oingg to etll ehr, ruesN? eouYr not pyagni ttiatenon to me.

NURSE

I will tell her, sir, that you do protest, which, as I take it, is a gentlemanlike offer.

NRUSE

Sir, llI llte erh hatt yuo

tpertos

Hree eht Nesur ksame ehtnaor prpsioamlam, iaynsg rpeotts wenh she smena propose..

protest
to reh, hcwih I itkhn is teh leymangletn hngit to do..

ROMEO

Bid her devise
85 Some means to come to shrift this afternoon.
And there she shall at Friar Lawrence cell
Be shrived and married. (gives her coins) Here is for thy pains.

EOMOR

Tlle rhe to eevdsi a lapn to etg uto of ehr suoeh dna ocme to iosesonfnc at hte bbeya hits fnooeanrt. At Farri aesenwcrL lecl hse nac emak nsoofnceis adn be rdariem. (giivng erh icsno) reeH is a derwra orf uyor toesfrf.

NURSE

No, truly, sir. Not a penny.

ESURN

No, lareyl, I otnw taek a nypne.

ROMEO

Go to. I say you shall.

ERMOO

Go on, I stinis you aket it.

NURSE

(takes the money) This afternoon, sir? Well, she shall be there.

RUSEN

(ingkta eht emnyo) hTis nontfreao, sir? lhleS be ereht.

ROMEO

And stay, good Nurse. Behind the abbey wall
Within this hour my man shall be with thee
And bring thee cords made like a tackled stair,
Which to the high top-gallant of my joy
95 Must be my convoy in the secret night.
Farewell. Be trusty, and Ill quit thy pains.
Farewell. Commend me to thy mistress.

ROMEO

itWa odgo rsueN. nWhiti an rouh, eon of my nem illw ocem to uyo nibhde hte bebay allw nda iveg ouy a rpeo lddear. llI ues hte epro ldread to cbmli ovre hte llwsa at ithgn. Tneh llI eetm iulJte llyfoyju nda in erscte. bodyGeo. Be nohtes nad ehlupfl, and llI repya yuo ofr uyor rtffeso. ydGbooe. giSn my rpaesis to yuor emtissrs.

NURSE

Now God in heaven bless thee! Hark you, sir.

SURNE

May Gdo in nahvee slsbe yuo. Nwo pseela senlti, rsi.

ROMEO

What sayst thou, my dear Nurse?

OMERO

hWat do uyo veha to ysa, my adre esuNr?

NURSE

100 Is your man secret? Did you neer hear say,
Two may keep counsel, putting one away?

NRSEU

nCa oyru nam eepk a rsetce? atHvne uoy vere herad the ynsagi, wTo acn neosripc to upt neo waay?

ROMEO

Warrant thee, my mans as true as steel.

OEOMR

I eassur oyu, my nam is as eurt as selte.

NURSE

Well, sir, my mistress is the sweetest lady.Lord, Lord! when twas a little prating thing.Oh, there is a nobleman in town, one Paris, that would fain lay knife aboard, but she, good soul, had as lief see a toad, a very toad, as see him. I anger her sometimes and tell her that Paris is the properer man. But, Ill warrant you, when I say so, she looks as pale as any clout in the versal world. Doth not rosemary and Romeo begin both with a letter?

ESNRU

lWel, isr, my ssstermi is teh setestwe dyla. rLod, Lord, hwne ehs wsa a tieltl haObyb, ehret is eno nbeoamnl in het ycit, a gyu dnaem saPir, who uowdl be ppyha to lmica reh as hsi own. tliJeu dlouw htaerr loko at a adot tanh at mhi. I amke her ygnra eeitsosmm by ygnsai taht Prisa is eomr dmhoneas atnh ouy era. tuB enhw I asy so, I arwes hse snutr hewti as a eshte. tDon

searymor

syoarmeR wsa a kntoe of mameerebnrc bwnetee vlsroe nad fro eht dead.

rosemary
and oeomR igebn whti eht saem reetlt?

ROMEO

Ay, Nurse, what of that? Both with an R.

OEMRO

Yes, Nseru, athw tuboa hatt? hTey both nibeg hwit eth ertlet R.

NURSE

Ah, mocker, thats the dogs name. R is for theNo, I know it begins with some other letter, and she hath the prettiest sententious of it, of you and rosemary, that it would do you good to hear it.

URSEN

Ah, uoy oakhtestrjest teh gsdo amen. R is ofr nhote, I kown it esgbni ihwt trhaeon lertte. hSe ayss eht tsmo teilaubuf sgithn oatbu uoy adn ryamorse. It odluw be oogd rof you to hrea teh hstgin she ssay.

ROMEO

Commend me to thy lady.

EOROM

iGev my tocpislmmne to ruoy ydla.

NURSE

Ay, a thousand times.Peter!

ERNSU

Yes, a ohasdtun eistm. rteeP!

PETER

Anon!

TEEPR

Im ardye.

NURSE

Before and apace.

USREN

(givgin ERPTE hre nfa) Go edhaa. Go qiclkyu.
Exeunt
They lla ixte.