Romeo and Juliet

by: William Shakespeare

  Act 2 Scene 4

page Act 2 Scene 4 Page 5

Original Text

Modern Text

ROMEO

I stretch it out for that word “broad,” which, added to the goose, proves thee far and wide a broad goose.

ROMEO

I stretch my joke for that word “fat.” If you add that word to the word “goose,” it shows that you are a fat goose.

MERCUTIO

Why, is not this better now than groaning for love? Now art thou sociable. Now art thou Romeo. Now art thou what thou art—by art as well as by nature, for this driveling love is like a great natural that runs lolling up and down to hide his bauble in a hole.

MERCUTIO

Why, isn’t all this joking better than groaning about love? Now you’re sociable. Now you’re Romeo. Now you are what you’ve learned to be and what you are naturally. This love of yours was like a blithering idiot who runs up and down looking for a hole to hide his

toy

Toy = a double entendre for penis

toy
in.

BENVOLIO

Stop there, stop there.

BENVOLIO

Stop there, stop there.

MERCUTIO

Thou desirest me to stop in my tale against the hair.

MERCUTIO

You want me to stop my

tale

Tale = a double entendre for penis

tale
before I’m done.

BENVOLIO

45Thou wouldst else have made thy tale large.

BENVOLIO

Otherwise your tale would have gotten too long.

MERCUTIO

Oh, thou art deceived. I would have made it short, for I was come to the whole depth of my tale, and meant, indeed, to occupy the argument no longer.

MERCUTIO

Oh, you’re wrong. I would have made it short. I had come to the deepest part of my tale, and I planned to say nothing more on the topic.
Enter NURSE and her man PETER
The NURSE enters with her servant, PETER.

ROMEO

Here’s goodly gear.

ROMEO

Here’s something good.

BENVOLIO

A sail, a sail!

BENVOLIO

MERCUTIO

Two, two—a shirt and a smock.

MERCUTIO

There’s two—a man and a woman.

NURSE

50Peter!

NURSE

Peter!