The Tempest

by: William Shakespeare

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CALIBAN

What a pied ninny’s this!—Thou scurvy patch!—
I do beseech thy greatness, give him blows
And take his bottle from him. When that’s gone,
65He shall drink naught but brine, for I’ll not show him
Where the quick freshes are.

CALIBAN

What an idiot this guy is!—You’re a rotten piece of work!—I beg your highness, beat him up and take his wine bottle from him. When he loses that, he’ll be drinking salt water, since I’ll never tell him where the freshwater springs are.

STEPHANO

Trinculo, run into no further danger. Interrupt the monster one word further, and, by this hand, I’ll turn my mercy out o' doors and make a stockfish of thee.

STEPHANO

Trinculo, watch out. If you interrupt this monster with one more word, I’ll beat you like a piece of salted fish.

TRINCULO

70Why, what did I? I did nothing. I’ll go farther off.

TRINCULO

What did I do? I didn’t do anything. I need to get away from you.

STEPHANO

Didst thou not say he lied?

STEPHANO

Didn’t you call him a liar?

ARIEL

Thou liest.

ARIEL

You lie.

STEPHANO

(to TRINCULO) Do I so? Take thou that.
(beats TRINCULO)
75As you like this, give me the lie another time.

STEPHANO

(to TRINCULO) Oh, I did? Take that, then. (he beats TRINCULO) If you want more beatings like that, just accuse me of lying again.

TRINCULO

I did not give the lie. Out o' your wits and hearing too? A pox o' your bottle! This can sack and drinking do. A murrain on your monster, and the devil take your fingers!

TRINCULO

I didn’t accuse you of lying. Are you out of your mind and deaf too? Damn your wine! This is what happens when you drink too much. Your monster can go to hell, and you can too!

CALIBAN

Ha, ha, ha!

CALIBAN

Ha, ha, ha!

STEPHANO

80Now, forward with your tale.—Prithee, stand farther off.

STEPHANO

Now go ahead and tell me the rest of your story.—Please go stand farther away.

CALIBAN

Beat him enough. After a little time,
I’ll beat him too.

CALIBAN

Beat him up. After a little while, I’ll beat him too.

STEPHANO

Stand farther.—Come, proceed.

STEPHANO

Stand farther away.— Come on, continue your story.