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How the Harry Potter Series Would Have Been Different If Neville Had Been the Chosen One

Harry Potter scholars have spent countless hours of their busy Harry Potter academic schedules researching what it would have been like if the *other* baby born in July of 1980 had been the prophesied Chosen One, instead of Harry Potter.

Imagine an alternate universe in which Neville Longbottom’s nursery was invaded one hot summer’s night by Voldey; in which *Neville* possessed a power incomprehensible to Tom Riddle; in which Snape spent eight books hissing “Longgg. Bottommmm.” disparagingly at Neville and his army of misfits instead of at Harry. Neville may have one of the more absurd last names within the Harry Potter universe, but is that any indication of his leadership capabilities? Of course not. But, yeah, maybe. In any case, I still believe dear Neville could have muddled along just as well as the hapless Harry if he had been The Chosen One. Here’s what else would have been different…

If Neville Had Been the Chosen One, he still would have been raised by his horrid grandmother because, in case anyone forgot, Neville also lost his parents. And maybe people would have told him that he had his mother’s eyes every once in awhile, instead of Harry being the only one who was allowed to be sad about being orphaned as a baby.

If Neville Had Been the Chosen One, he would have grown up in the Wizarding World with everyone knowing his name. This might have improved his confidence a smidge.

If Neville Had Been the Chosen One, people would have spent more time squinting their eyes at him thinking, “Yeah, he’s alright-looking if you don’t stare too hard,” instead of doing that while looking at Harry.

If Neville Had Been the Chosen One, he would have wanted Hermione as a friend right away, and only warmed to Ron over time.

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, he would have made Herbology as cool as Quidditch. In fact, in his second year, half the school would have skipped the Ravenclaw versus Hufflepuff match to watch Neville bravely stew Mandrakes to save the petrified students.

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, his Yule Ball transformation would have sent sweet Cedric into a rage over not being the Dreamiest Lad in School anymore. Cedric would have then begged for Neville’s forgiveness for his foolishness, to which Neville would have obviously replied, “There’s nothing to forgive, Ced.”

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, he still would have defeated Voldemort in his first and second year at Hogwarts because getting through all of that pretty much came down to blind luck and Hermione’s logic for Harry.

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, Harry would have totally whiffed when he tried to chop off Nagini’s head, and Neville would have sighed and had to do it himself. He would have told Harry afterwards that he was proud of him for trying.


via GIPHY

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, he wouldn’t have looked down on Harry as a bumbling fool, despite the fact that Harry is one. Because Neville is kind to everyone, no matter what.

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, Dumbledore probably still wouldn’t have told him anything. Thanks, Dumbledore.

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, he would have been kind of screwed because Snape wasn’t in love with Neville’s mum—so Snape would still be on Voldemort’s side, crankily lusting after Lily in his Team Deatheater jersey. So basically, on top of being the cruelest professor of small children ever, Snape would also be seriously evil and happy to kill them.

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, he would have kindly declined when his name was pulled from The Goblet of Fire. After all, he wasn’t of age, and it seemed both unfair and more than slightly ominous. Plus, he didn’t need an ego boost.

If Neville Had Been The Chosen One, he would have started a craze for toads as pets. Years after his graduation the school grounds would still be infested with the croaking, hopping creatures.

What do you think would have happened if Neville has been The Chosen One? How many times is too many times to look this Instagram pic?