SparkNotes Blog

The Thirstiest Literary Characters, RANKED

If you have zero cool, lots of enthusiasm, a massive crush on someone who maybe isn’t aware of your existence, and a history of sending texts like, “I NOTICED THAT YOU LIKE BURRITOS I LIKE BURRITOS TOO MAYBE DO YOU WANT TO BE MY BOYFRIEND AND KISS ME ON MY MOUTH,” there’s a good chance that you’re suffering from THE THIRST.

Though we can’t cure your thirst-ness (we’re writers, dammit, not miracle-workers), we can at least reassure you that you’re in good company: literature is packed with characters who go for their crushes in big ways, and usually get rejected/die alone/sprint toward the neartest exit, never to be heard from again.

From the ever-so-slightly desperate to the mad-dehydrated-thirsty, we’ve got your thirstiest literary characters right here.