Real Talk: The Female Singer-Songwriters of the Mid-’90s Got Me Through Middle School

High school may have a bad rap for being brutal, but for me it was the middle school era that bit the hardest.  I spent most of those three years with laser eyes trained to the floor, hoping for a sudden superpower onset of complete invisibility from all the meanies running roughshod with their sharp little word daggers.

There were a lot of woes causing my down demeanor, of course, not the least of which was the fact that all of my “friends” seemed to have disappeared into their various clique-y corners of the courtyard while I stood out like a lightning rod for everyone else’s cruel amusement. 

But there was still one thing thing that kept me moving and grooving and saw me through: Music. Like really, really good music.

The mid-’90s were a particularly great era for female performers, and it was through their lyrics and achievements that this gal found life while elbow-deep in the doldrums.

1. First, there were the butterflies from Mariah.

The first album that came along and gave me a respite from all the rawr-inducing reality was Mariah Carey’s Daydream. Sure, MC had a well-developed discography in place already before her CD dropped in the fall of ‘95, but there was something special about that song collection that sung to me after I swiped it from my parents’ shelf.

While I couldn’t relate to everything that sent her jumping to all those crazy high notes—because romance and heartbreak were still years away from joining the fold of feelings—the whole thing still evoked real emotions and became a promise of good things to come at the lit end of whatever torture tunnel I was travelling through at the time. Put simply, it gave me a few warm and fuzzies to replace some of the sads.

Plus, it made realize that there is healing to be found in music, and I was instantly hooked.

2. Then Alanis arrived as angry angel.

Soon an even more potent dose of mind medicine found its way into my life by way of Alanis Morissette’s epic Jagged Little Pill, which a neighbor passed along after realizing it just wasn’t her jam. 

In the mix, Alanis barked right back at the nasties with a ferocity that was so, so sick and timely. Even though “You Oughta Know” was loaded up with the then-foreign subject matter of bitter breakups, it still emoted substance and FIGHT I could relate to so hard and introduced me to my right to be mad. Also, she told me that even yucky bits of life have their purpose (and I believed her). 

I soon found myself bucking at the guff others were trying to hand me about my poofy hair or chipped nails or whatever else struck their funning fancy. It was 100% freeing to literally tune into that feeling and give in to a healthy dose of NO once in awhile.

3. Gwen Stefani helped shed some of that self-doubt.

No Doubt’s Tragic Kingdom was the third album to hit all the right notes of my existence. I’d had just enough allowance fundage to afford the tape for myself, and after hearing a couple of the singles play on the radio, it was a must-have.

“Just a Girl” was/is/always will be exactly the kinda anthem that can get any 12-year-old riled up a ready for adversity. And “Don’t Speak” spoke volumes about the hurt that words can contain, while “Spiderwebs” was awesome exercise in actual name-taking. Plus there was “You Can Do It” which PREACHED about adopting a little perspective for the most bummer moments.

It was like having your heart heard and then sung right back to you with all this funky instrumental accompaniment—a 14-song culmination of yaass.

4. Sarah McLachlan had her own rad Galentine’s Day celebration.

Sarah McLachlan floated her way into the mainstream thanks to her crazy gorgeous vocals and the emotional havoc she wreaked in her Surfacing collection, like with her “Angel” which totally knew my life. 

And she cemented her status as a goals-inducing legend by basically being the Taylor Swift of the ‘90s and establishing one of the most epic girl squads in music history.

McLachlan paired with Paula Cole (yes, she of Dawson’s Creek title track acclaim) —after they were stymied by industry boys who didn’t want them performing back-to-back together because they were women. The pair created 1997’s Lilith Fair music fest which was appropriately nicknamed “Girlapalooza” and rallied EVERYONE to play along and show up the nay-sayers.

Who joined the crew? Jewel (whose Pieces of You was as delicious a bite of soul candy as any of the above) joined in, and so did vocalists like Sheryl Crow, Tracy Chapman, Shawn Colvin, Fiona Apple, Natalie Merchant, the Indigo Girls, and more. It was a lineup of legends.

These ladies left their mark on me in a major way throughout all this because they proved, once and for all, that there is no such thing as a boys-only club. It was a breath of fresh air about the endlessly possible future ahead. 

5. Meredith Brooks took the stigma out of being real.

By the time Meredith Brooks broke onto the scene with her hit “B*tch,” the world seemed more than ready for exactly this kind of truth track that spelled out the complex reality of womanhood — an important thing for this then-budding teen with many chaotic emotions to receive the thumbs up about.

The message: “It’s OK to be uneven. Own it.” Yes ma’am. 

6. And then there were girls spicing up the world.

You might not think of the Spice Girls as feminist icons, but they came along during a time when girl groups were few and far between while boy bands were busy melting all the hearts and airwaves. SG immediately laid claim to the pop culture throne with a fire that could not be doused by any volume of haterade.

The five—Ginger, Baby, Sporty, Scary and Posh Spice—had pep in their steps and championed the concept that, yes, girls can rule, too.

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If it hadn’t been for the harmonious timing of these melodies coming alongside all my IRL maladies, the ending to this story might be different. But as it happened, the epic line-up of lady songstresses helped me make it through and onto high school, relatively unscathed.

And the best part? The power of these records still completely holds up. Well worth a revisit for if you too are battling the blahs.

Are there any musicians who’ve gotten you through a tough time?