Why Everyone Deserves Siblings

Being an only child stinks. People try to romanticize it—you are the apple of your parents’ eye! What are siblings but a backup plan?—but I’m calling b.s. Sure, there are some perks, but the positives don’t outweigh the negatives. Disagree? Well, you’re wrong! Sorry, I usually don’t take such a “strong” “stance” when it comes to people’s personal lives, but on this subject, I must. Here’s why everyone needs siblings:

Socialization

Chances are, if you’re an only child, you’ll spend a lot of time with adults before you start school. When you finally make it to your first day of pre-school or kindergarten, other kids your age will seem like strange aliens who won’t share their toys and aren’t impressed when you draw a complete circle. Why? I don’t know, I was an only child, but if I had to guess, I’d say it’s because they are in buried in their own bizarre kid brains and have never been trusted with their own china dinnerware. You’d understand that if you ever spent an extended period of time dealing with these animals.

Life Is Confusing and Sometimes Adults Act Weird

Ah, yes, this one. Here’s the thing, no matter how healthy/stable/supportive your parents are, they’re still people, and are therefore flawed. Humans are made up of a lot of good qualities, some bad, and some that can only be described as “we don’t know where David gets that from.” There are going to be points in your childhood where your parents’ behavior is baffling, life feels unpredictable, and you’ll be confused. It’s much easier to process these events when you can go to someone close to your age, who is experiencing the same thing, and say “Uh it’s not normal for dads to mow the lawn in a Speedo while blasting Journey, right?”

Clothes

If you’ve got an older sibling, you get to inherit cool clothes. If you’ve got a younger one, you can dress them in absurd outfits and parade them around the neighborhood. If you’re an only child, looks like it’s time to play in dad’s sock drawer again.

The World Is Chaotic and You Should Experience That as a Child

You’re not so precious. Unfortunately, if you’re an only child, you might take yourself a little more seriously than other kids. Why? Because a big brother didn’t pinch you for no reason in the middle of a movie. Your feelings weren’t hurt when your younger sister had the flu and everybody was so concerned about her lungs that they forgot your birthday. Sure these things aren’t pleasant at the time, but they do force you to realize that there are other people on the planet, and sometimes someone hurts you for no reason and sometimes someone takes away your spotlight accidentally. These lessons will be absorbed no matter what, but the world is way less gentle with this education in adulthood. Better to learn them young.

You Need Someone to Help You Deal when You’re a Kid

When you fall off your bike for the first time. When you go through puberty and think that you’ll explode. When picking a college, a prom date, or a zit: you’re going to want to talk to someone who can offer insights your parents just can’t provide.

Someone to Help you Deal When You’re an Adult

Ugh. This. One. Is. The. Worst. Parents will age and they will need your help. Wouldn’t it be easier if someone was there to share this responsibility? Yes, the answer is yes.

Chances Are, You Won’t Be Spoiled

But everyone will think you have been as soon as they learn you’re an only child. Most parents of only children are so hyper-vigilant that they don’t fulfill the prophecy of the spoiled only-child that you’ll feel like you’re the butt of some unspoken joke when, later in life, people say, “An only child! Must have been nice getting whatever you wanted!”

Shared Childhood Memories

Parents will experience your childhood with you, but through the lens of an adult. Siblings will experience your childhood with you through the same rose-colored glasses of childhood you are wearing. You will both store these shared memories. Later in life, a little piece of childhood magic buried deep inside you will be reignited when you spend time with your brother or sister and reminisce about the good old days. Think about it this way: your parents will know you from birth, but they won’t be around forever; your siblings will know you longer than anyone else on earth. You’re like each other’s horcruxes, but instead of dark magic, you hold the enchantment of youth.

Did you read Amelia’s counterargument? Are you an only child? Are siblings a must?