As You Like It

by: William Shakespeare

Original Text

Modern Text

Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY
TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY enter.

TOUCHSTONE

We shall find a time, Audrey. Patience, gentle Audrey.

TOUCHSTONE

We’ll get married at some point, Audrey. Be patient.

AUDREY

Faith, the priest was good enough, for all the old gentleman’s saying.

AUDREY

Really, the priest was good enough, no matter what that old guy said.

TOUCHSTONE

A most wicked Sir Oliver, Audrey, a most vile Martext. But, Audrey, there is a youth here in the forest lays claim to you.

TOUCHSTONE

No, he was wicked and vile. But Audrey, there’s a boy in the forest who claims you’re his girl.

AUDREY

Ay, I know who ’tis. He hath no interest in me in the world.

AUDREY

Yes, I know who you’re talking about, but he has no claim on me.
Enter WILLIAM
WILLIAM enters.
Here comes the man you mean.
Here comes the man himself.

TOUCHSTONE

It is meat and drink to me to see a clown. By my troth, we that have good wits have much to answer for. We shall be flouting. We cannot hold.

TOUCHSTONE

It warms my heart to encounter such a country bumpkin. Truly, we witty men can’t hold our tongues. We have to mess with the likes of him, we just can’t help it.

WILLIAM

Good ev'n, Audrey.

WILLIAM

Good evening, Audrey.

AUDREY

God gi' good ev'n, William.

AUDREY

Good evening, William.

WILLIAM

And good ev'n to you, sir.

WILLIAM

And good evening to you, sir.

TOUCHSTONE

15Good ev'n, gentle friend. Cover thy head, cover thy head.
Nay, prithee, be covered. How old are you, friend?

TOUCHSTONE

Good evening to you, good friend. No, no, put your hat back on, put it back on. No, please, keep your head covered. How old are you, friend?