The Comedy of Errors

William Shakespeare
No Fear Act 4 Scene 3
No Fear Act 4 Scene 3 Page 2

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DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

20No? Why, ’tis a plain case: he that went, like a bass viol in a case of leather; the man, sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives them a sob and ’rests them; he, sir, that takes pity on decayed men and gives them suits of durance; he that sets up his rest to do more exploits with his mace than a morris-pike.

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

No? It’s plain enough. The Adam who looks like a cello, in a big leather case. The one who gives tired people “arrest.” The one who gives ruined men new suits—law suits. The one who’s determined to do more damage with his nightstick than a soldier does with his pike.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

25What, thou meanest an officer?

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

You mean an officer?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Ay, sir, the sergeant of the band; he that brings any man to answer it that breaks his band; one that thinks a man always going to bed and says “God give you good rest.”

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Yes, the leader of the team; the one that gets you if you can’t pay a debt; the one who assumes people are always going to bed and says to them, “Have arrest.”

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

Well, sir, there rest in your foolery. Is there any ships put forth tonight? May we be gone?

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

Well, sir, stop your joking there. Are any ships leaving tonight? Can we go?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Why, sir, I brought you word an hour since that the bark Expedition put forth tonight, and then were you hindered by the sergeant to tarry for the hoy Delay. Here are the angels that you sent for to deliver you.

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Why, sir, I told you an hour ago that the good ship Expedition was leaving tonight, but then the officer got you, and you decided to wait for the little rowboat Delay. Here’s the bail money you sent me to get.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

35The fellow is distract, and so am I,
And here we wander in illusions.
Some blessed power deliver us from hence!

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

This fellow’s gone mad, and so have I. We’re in some kind of dream world. Please, somebody, get us out of here!
Enter a COURTESAN
A COURTESAN enters.

COURTESAN

Well met, well met, Master Antipholus.
I see, sir, you have found the goldsmith now.
40Is that the chain you promised me today?

COURTESAN

Good to see you, Master Antipholus. I see you’ve met with the jeweler. Is that chain you’re wearing the one you promised to give to me?

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

Satan, avoid! I charge thee, tempt me not.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE

Get away from me, Satan! Don’t try to tempt me!

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Master, is this Mistress Satan?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Master, is this Satan’s mistress?

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