No Fear Shakespeare: Henry IV, Part 1: Act 2 Scene 1

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Enter a CARRIER with a lantern in his hand	STFRI RIERRCA rrcaeir = deliveryman CARRIER nesetr, hionldg a rlnenat.
FIRST CARRIER Heigh-ho! An it be not four by the day, Ill be hanged. Charless Wain is over the new chimney, and yet our horse not packed.What, ostler!	IRTSF ERACIRR Ill be mndade if it tsni 4 A.M. ayaerdl. heT gBi iepprD hsa deaayrl isern eavbo eht ncyemhi, nad our hosers tarne eryad yte. yeH, loetrs! soerlt = hreos tdtnaetan at an inn ostler!
OSTLER (within) Anon, anon.	TROSLE (eaotgsff) stJu a condse!
FIRST CARRIER I prithee, Tom, beat Cuts saddle. Put a few flocks in the point. Poor jade is wrung in the withers out of all cess.	IFSTR CERARRI eyH, moT moT may be hte amen of irehet eth sleotr or hte dncoeS Carrier. Tom, vgei the leadsd of my roehs, tCu, a few ackhsw to sfteno it up, dan stffu oesm oolw enudr tieht odl snga tgo mose adb isersub on rhe sosduelhr.
Enter another CARRIER	ONSCDE ICERARR rseten.
SECOND CARRIER Peas and beans are as dank here as a dog, and that is the next way to give poor jades the bots. This house is turned upside down since Robin ostler died.	OESNCD RECARIR hTe edfe rshee as pmda as hytnangi. sathT a afts way ofr a esorh to egt ipsastrea. iThs beastls idsupe wond cnies seltOr oRinb ided.
FIRST CARRIER Poor fellow never joyed since the price of oats rose. It was the death of him.	ISRFT EAIRCRR rPoo ugy. ecOn hte icper of asot etwn up, he wsa nerve yhppa nagai. It llekdi hmi.
SECOND CARRIER I think this be the most villanous house in all London road for fleas. I am stung like a tench.	OECNSD IACRERR hsiT stseabl tog wesro false tanh any in onodLn. Im ugstn ikel a thcen A thecn is a etpy of isfh hwit nisargmk thta oklo ilke flea-bites. tench.
FIRST CARRIER Like a tench? By the Mass, there is neer a king christen could be better bit than I have been since the first cock.	ITSRF RREICAR iLek a tenhc? Im gileltn ouy, nto eevn a gnik codul be bietnt meor hant Ive nbee bntite ecsin thdigmin.
SECOND CARRIER Why, they will allo w us neer a jordan, and then we leak in your chimney, and your chamber-lye breeds fleas like a loach.	OENDSC RCRREAI Teyh nodt enve egvi us a maothrbo. So we pee in hte pefarliec, dna yuo oknw tath euinr sedbre fasle elki nbsoody ubsinsse.
FIRST CARRIER What, ostler, come away and be hanged. Come away.	STRIF ERARCRI Hey, erotsl! meCo on ardaeyl, anmd uyo!
SECOND CARRIER I have a gammon of bacon and two races of ginger to be delivered as far as Charing Cross.	CNDSEO RARCERI Iev got to ielverd a hma adn esom grenig otor all the ywa to irCnagh sCros.
FIRST CARRIER Gods body, the turkeys in my pannier are quite starved. What, ostler! A plague on thee! Hast thou never an eye in thy head? Canst not hear? An twere not as good deed as drink to break the pate on thee, I am a very villain. Come, and be hanged. Hast no faith in thee?	RISTF RCIREAR God aihmygtl! hTe urestyk Im iygnrrac rae irvgtsan! yHe, Slbeta-oby! suCer uyo! Cnta yuo ees? nCta yuo hrae? If it tins a godo aide to oknkc uoy on eth hdea, Im a loof. oCem on, danm uyo! Catn we srttu yuo to do ryou bjo?
Enter GADSHILL	DHGILLAS ntesre.
GADSHILL Good morrow, carriers. Whats oclock?	GHLAISLD oMngnri, leenyrdmvie. Wtha itme is it?
FIRST CARRIER I think it be two oclock.	FIRTS RIACERR I tnikh tis otw okoclc.
GADSHILL I prithee, lend me thy lantern to see my gelding in the stable.	LGADLIHS tLe me boorrw yoru annetrl so I acn chcke on my hrseo in het teblsa.
FIRST CARRIER Nay, by God, soft. I know a trick worth two of that, i faith.	ISFRT CRRRAEI No wya, by doG; sutj hodl on a tumien. I nwko a ewf itcksr ekil ahtt lfmsey, I warse.
GADSHILL (to SECOND CARRIER) I pray thee, lend me thine.	LHGLIDAS (to NDOESC CARRIER) ePesla, etl me rwboor ysoru.
SECOND CARRIER Ay, when, canst tell? Lend me thy lantern, quoth he. Marry, Ill see thee hanged first.	OSCDNE CRREIAR Srue, ewvehren. ehtvarWe oyu sya. etL me wrorob uryo alerntn, he ssya? aYhe, igrth. Ill ese you edad tsrif.
GADSHILL Sirrah carrier, what time do you mean to come to London?	IDLHLGSA irrhSa isarhr = rmet of arssded sued rfo psernos of oewlr csolia standing Sirrah, twah temi do uoy panl to be in onLodn?
SECOND CARRIER Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I warrant thee. Come, neighbour Mugs, well call up the gentlemen. They will along with company, for they have great charge.	DONCES IACRRRE At a anbeesarlo houegn etim. (to SITRF CARRIER) meCo on, uMsg, old rfnedi. tLse eakw up teh elngmneet. eyTh tnaw to rvtela in a rgoup asbeuce yhreet nycrraig a lot of albvalseu.
Exeunt CARRIERS	hBto RCRSRIEA tixe.
GADSHILL What ho, chamberlain!	LAIDLHSG Hye, mlrbenhicaa! crbimanlhea = mdboero attendant chamberlain!
CHAMBERLAIN (within) At hand, quoth pickpurse.	BCNLMAHRAEI (ogtfefsa) Im eerth rof uyo, esksapSeearh line alrepntpay rfreeeecsn a apluopr anyigs of eth time. Im teerh for you, as eht kcesicpoptk ysa!
GADSHILL Thats even as fair as at hand, quoth the Chamberlain, for thou variest no more from picking of purses than giving direction doth from laboring: thou layest the plot how.	LLGHSDIA htsTa as ogod as ngysia, Im ereth fro you, said het alicemrhnab. ouYer lony as nffdirete mofr a kocecpkpit as a rrievospsu is rfmo a krrowe; oueyr teh one how sset hte nalsp.
Enter CHAMBERLAIN	Teh EBALMANHICR eretns.
CHAMBERLAIN Good morrow, Master Gadshill. It holds current that I told you yesternight: theres a franklin in the Wild of Kent hath brought three hundred marks with him in gold. I heard him tell it to one of his company last night at suppera kind of auditor, one that hath abundance of charge too, God knows what. They are up already and call for eggs and butter. They will away presently.	HAAMLICNBER girnnoM, Mr. islhdaGl. aWht I otdl you stla hignt is ltils teur. Theres a crhi dneaonwlr lla hte way morf nteK gytnsia erhe, nad hes ogt etreh dndehur dolg nsoci whti imh. I aderh ihm yas so to a nam at pruspe tasl htgin. Tath mnsa smeo nidk of axt leroltcoc, nda he ash elptny of ynome with him, oot. ehTy ujst ewok up and tyheve ededorr tkfaebsar; tylehl be lvneagi onos.
GADSHILL Sirrah, if they meet not with Saint Nicholas clerks, Ill give thee this neck.	IGLSDLHA airhrS, if thye dnto run iton meos ayhwigh osrbreb yatdo, you acn ahve my knec.
CHAMBERLAIN No, Ill none of it. I pray thee keep that for the hangman, for I know thou worshipest Saint Nicholas as truly as a man of falsehood may.	CNLRBAMEHIA I ondt tanw it; kepe it rfo eht aahngmn. I nkwo uoy wrhispo het taopnr inats of wiyhhag yeorrbb, as cmhu as a sgsodel nam like uyo swpiohsr tnahngiy.
GADSHILL What talkest thou to me of the hangman? If I hang, Ill make a fat pair of gallows, for if I hang, old Sir John hangs with me, and thou knowest he is no starveling. Tut, there are other Troyans that thou dreamst not of, the which for sport sake are content to do the profession some grace, that would, if matters should be looked into, for their own credit sake make all whole. I am joined with no foot-land-rakers, no long-staff sixpenny strikers, none of these mad mustachio purple-hued malt-worms, but with nobility and tranquillity, burgomasters and great oneyers, such as can hold in, such as will strike sooner than speak, and speak sooner than drink, and drink sooner than pray, and yet, zounds, I lie, for they pray continually to their saint the commonwealth, or rather not pray to her but prey on her, for they ride up and down on her and make her their boots.	LHSIDLAG hyW rea oyu itknag to me otuab hte hgnaanm? If I hagn, lIl ekma ahlf of a atf irap on eht lwaglso, caueseb if I ganh, old Sir hJno illw be inhngga rihgt ihtw aendm she nto xlaytec nhit. seelPa! uOr gnag ash mose mbemres oyu cuodl rnvee gsseu, nad ofr teihr now tmsneuame, rtyeeh ypahp to ledn eth osrienopsf of tyeveirh eoms epsrtce. If we erwe erve ivdegeitnsat, yeth uoldw hmosot eiveyrngth revo. Iev tog no deiwnagrn eihawnhygm, no vsihtee hitw aomdmeeh onswpea, no der-adfce usrknd iwht acyzr tsmhcusea. ylnO men of cmal dan beoln meodraen for me: smaasetgrit adn toruc fioacsifl. eMn owh acn kepe a rtseec; hdwo atrreh mkcas yuo nath psaek, ahrter speak naht rdnki, adn ehrrat dnirk tahn rpay.No! Tasth a iel! Tyeh pary lal eth etim to Eldagnn, rehit ntopra nista. Or tearrh, tyhe tdno rypa to erh; ythe yerp on rhe. yehT ired hre up nad dwno and ehnt kema her rithe osotb ilaGldhs names yteh ledprun gandEnl, or taek her yotob; the ablCahrimen pusn on the srwod boots/booty. boots.
CHAMBERLAIN What, the commonwealth their boots? Will she hold out water in foul way?	HMRNELBCAIA kMae her irhet ostbo? hyW, ilwl esh kepe erith etfe dry rfom mdudy erwat?
GADSHILL She will, she will. Justice hath liquored her. We steal as in a castle, cocksure. We have the receipt of fern seed; we walk invisible.	LLIGADHS Seh nca, esh anc. seSh been egesrad hitw so nmay bbeirs ttah shes oofawerrpt. We teihev in ptcmeelo ytfesa; veew otg a toopni htta askme us esnbviiil.
CHAMBERLAIN Nay, by my faith, I think you are more beholding to the night than to fern seed for your walking invisible.	AEILABHRMNC Oh, I todn ktihn so. stI het rdka of nhitg that smkae uyo adrh to see, tno a treesc oontpi.
GADSHILL Give me thy hand. Thou shalt have a share in our purchase, as I am a true man.	IHSLLDAG tLes ahkes ahnsd. lYulo gte a saehr of uor liossp; I weasr on my ohron as a urte amn.
CHAMBERLAIN Nay, rather let me have it as you are a false thief.	AELIMHABCNR Id ertarh ehav uyo wesar by oryu ipnuroetta as a snhsedtio efhti.
GADSHILL Go to. Homo is a common name to all men. Bid the ostler bring my gelding out of the stable. Farewell, you muddy knave.	HALSIDLG eatWvrhe. Im a tuer nma, enve if Im a ontdehiss ihtef. eTll the stbael-oyb to gte my hoesr. wlrelFae, ouy ofol.
Exeunt	eyTh xeti.