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Original Text

Modern Text
Enter PANDARUS and TROILUS.
PANDARUS and TROILUS enter.
TROILUS
Call here my varlet; I’ll unarm again.
Why should I war without the walls of Troy
That find such cruel battle here within?
Each Trojan that is master of his heart,
5
Let him to field; Troilus, alas, hath none.
TROILUS
Call my attendant; I’ll take my weapons off again. Why should I fight a war outside of the walls of Troy when there is such a cruel battle to fight within it? Each Trojan who is still master of his heart should fight; Troilus, alas, has no heart to fight.
PANDARUS
Will this gear ne’er be mended?
PANDARUS
Will this conflict ever be resolved?
TROILUS
The Greeks are strong and skilful to their strength,
Fierce to their skill, and to their fierceness valiant;
But I am weaker than a woman’s tear,
10
Tamer than sleep, fonder than ignorance,
Less valiant than the virgin in the night,
And skilless as unpracticed infancy.
TROILUS
The Greeks are strong and have a skill that matches their strength, a fierceness that matches their skill, and a bravery that matches their ferocity. But I am weaker than a woman’s tear, calmer than sleep, more devoted than ignorance, less brave than the virgin at night, and as uneducated as an untrained novice.
PANDARUS
Well, I have told you enough of this. For my
part, I’ll not meddle nor make no farther. He that will
15
have a cake out of the wheat must tarry the grinding.
PANDARUS
Well, I have spoken with you enough about this. For my part, I won’t have anything more to do with it than I already have. He who wants to bake a cake must be patient enough to grind the wheat into flour.
TROILUS
Have I not tarried?
TROILUS
Haven’t I been patient?
PANDARUS
Ay, the grinding; but you must tarry the
bolting.
PANDARUS
Yes, for the grinding, but you must also be patient enough to sift the flour.
TROILUS
Have I not tarried?
TROILUS
Haven’t I been patient?
PANDARUS
20
Ay, the bolting; but you must tarry the
leavening.
PANDARUS
Yes, for the sifting, but you must also be patient enough to let the cake rise.
TROILUS
Still have I tarried.
TROILUS
I’ve been patient about that, too.
PANDARUS
Ay, to the leavening; but here’s yet in the word
hereafter the kneading, the making of the cake, the
25
heating the oven, and the baking. Nay, you must stay
the cooling too, or you may chance burn your lips.
PANDARUS
Yes, to let the cake rise. But there’s more to do—kneading the dough, making the cake, heating the oven, and baking the cake. And then you must let it cool, or you might burn your lips.
TROILUS
Patience herself, what goddess e’er she be,
Doth lesser blench at suff’rance than I do.
At Priam’s royal table do I sit
30
And when fair Cressid comes into my thoughts—
So, traitor! “When she comes”? When is she
thence?
TROILUS
Patience herself, whatever goddess she may be, tolerates less suffering than I do. I sit at Priam’s royal table, and Cressida comes into my mind—I sound like a traitor of love! “When she comes into my mind”? When is she not in my thoughts?
PANDARUS
Well, she looked yesternight fairer than ever
I saw her look, or any woman else.
PANDARUS
Well, last night she looked more beautiful than I ever saw her, or any other woman, look.
TROILUS
35
I was about to tell thee: when my heart,
As wedgèd with a sigh, would rive in twain,
Lest Hector or my father should perceive me,
I have, as when the sun doth light a-scorn,
Buried this sigh in wrinkle of a smile;
40
But sorrow that is couched in seeming gladness
Is like that mirth fate turns to sudden sadness.
TROILUS
I was about to tell you: my heart felt as if it was being forced apart by a sigh, splitting in two, and so that Hector or my father wouldn’t notice, like the sun that lights up a storm, I covered my sigh with a smile. But sorrow disguised in happiness is like that joy that fate suddenly turns into sadness.
PANDARUS
An her hair were not somewhat darker than
Helen’s—well, go to—there were no more comparison
between the women. But, for my part, she is
45
my kinswoman; I would not, as they term it, praise
her, but I would somebody had heard her talk yesterday,
as I did. I will not dispraise your sister Cassandra’s
wit, but—
PANDARUS
If her hair were not a little darker than Helen’s—well, forget it then—there would be no comparing the women. But she is family to me; I don’t want to, as they say, praise her, but I wish someone had heard her talk yesterday, like I did. I will not insult your sister Cassandra’s intelligence, but —
TROILUS
O, Pandarus! I tell thee, Pandarus:
50
When I do tell thee there my hopes lie drowned,
Reply not in how many fathoms deep
They lie indrenched. I tell thee I am mad
In Cressid’s love. Thou answer’st she is fair;
Pourest in the open ulcer of my heart
55
Her eyes, her hair, her cheek, her gait, her voice;
Handiest in thy discourse—O—that her hand,
In whose comparison all whites are ink
Writing their own reproach, to whose soft seizure
The cygnet’s down is harsh, and spirit of sense
60
Hard as the palm of plowman. This thou tell’st me,
As true thou tell’st me, when I say I love her.
But, saying thus, instead of oil and balm
Thou lay’st in every gash that love hath given me
The knife that made it.
TROILUS
Oh Pandarus! I tell you, Pandarus: When I tell you that my hopes have drowned, don’t reply by telling me how many fathoms deep they are underwater. I tell you I am madly in love with Cressida, and you answer that she is beautiful, worsening the open sore in my heart with the thought of her eyes, her hair, her cheeks, the way she walks, her voice. You talk about her hand—oh, her beautiful hand, which is so white it makes all other whites seem like black ink, ink that writes about its failure to be as white as she, and which is so soft a young swan’s feathers seem as rough as a farmer’s hands. You say this to me, and it’s true, just as when I tell you I love her. But instead of soothing me with ointment and balm, your words are like a knife that cuts even deeper into the gash of my love for her.
PANDARUS
65
I speak no more than truth.
PANDARUS  
I only speak the truth.
TROILUS
Thou dost not speak so much.
TROILUS  
What you say doesn’t begin to express the truth.
PANDARUS  
Faith, I’ll not meddle in it. Let her be as she
is. If she be fair, ’tis the better for her; an she be
not, she has the mends in her own hands.
PANDARUS  
Rest assured, I won’t get involved. Let her be as she is. If she is beautiful, all the better for her. And if she’s not, she can figure things out for herself.
TROILUS  
70
Good Pandarus—how now, Pandarus?
TROILUS  
Good Pandarus—why so hasty?
PANDARUS  
I have had my labor for my travail, ill thought
on of her, and ill thought on of you; gone between
and between, but small thanks for my labor.
PANDARUS  
All I have to show for my hard work is pain; she and you both think badly of me. I have received very little thanks for my effort in getting involved with you two.
TROILUS
What, art thou angry, Pandarus? What, with
75
me?
TROILUS  
Wait, you are angry, Pandarus? Are you angry with me?
PANDARUS
Because she’s kin to me, therefore she’s not
so fair as Helen; an she were not kin to me, she
would be as fair o’ Friday as Helen is on Sunday.
But what care I? I care not an she were a blackamoor;
80
’tis all one to me.
PANDARUS
Because Cressida is family, I don’t want to brag, so I say she’s not as beautiful as Helen. But if she weren’t family, I would say she’s as beautiful on Friday as Helen is on

Sunday

Friday was a day of fasting, when women wore plain clothing. Sunday was a day when women looked their best, wearing their nicest clothing.

Sunday. But what do I care? I wouldn’t care if she was dark-skinned. It’s all the same to me.
TROILUS
Say I she is not fair?
TROILUS  
Am I saying she’s not fair-skinned?
PANDARUS  
I do not care whether you do or no. She’s a
fool to stay behind her father. Let her to the Greeks,
and so I’ll tell her the next time I see her. For my
85
part, I’ll meddle nor make no more i’ th’ matter.
PANDARUS  
I don’t care whether you do or don’t. She’s a fool to stay with her father. Let her go to the Greeks; I’ll tell her that the next time I see her. I’m not going to get involved in this matter anymore.
TROILUS  
Pandarus—
TROILUS  
Pandarus—
PANDARUS
Not I.
TROILUS
Sweet Pandarus—
PANDARUS
Pray you speak no more to me. I will leave
90
all as I found it, and there an end.
PANDARUS  
No, I’m not getting involved.
TROILUS
Sweet Pandarus—
PANDARUS  
Please don’t talk to me about it anymore. I will leave you two as I found you, and that’s that.
He exits.
Sounds alarum.
He exits.
An alarm sounds signaling a call to arms.
TROILUS
Peace, you ungracious clamors! Peace, rude sounds!
Fools on both sides! Helen must needs be fair
When with your blood you daily paint her thus.
I cannot fight upon this argument;
95
It is too starved a subject for my sword.
But Pandarus—O gods, how do you plague me!
I cannot come to Cressid but by Pandar,
And he’s as tetchy to be wooed to woo
As she is stubborn-chaste against all suit.
100
Tell me, Apollo, for thy Daphnes love,
What Cressid is, what Pandar, and what we.
Her bed is India; there she lies, a pearl.
Between our Ilium and where she resides,
Let it be called the wild and wand’ring flood,
105
Ourself the merchant, and this sailing Pandar
Our doubtful hope, our convoy, and our bark.
TROILUS
Quiet, rude noises! Quiet, harsh sounds! Both sides of this war are fools! Helen must be beautiful if she uses your blood as her makeup every day. I can’t fight for this cause. It’s too insignificant to draw my sword. But Pandarus—Oh gods, how you torture me! I cannot get to Cressida without Pandarus, and he’s as peevish at being a go-between as she is resistant to being courted.
Tell me, Apollo, given your experience with

Daphne

Apollo is one of the most revered and influential Greek and Roman gods. He had many love affairs, one of which was with Daphne, who, in an effort to escape him, turned into a shrub.

Daphne what do I do about Cressida, Pandarus, and all of this? Her bed is like

India

This refers to either the East or West Indies, a location far away that was thought to have great wealth and luxury.

India and she lies in it like a

pearl

A pearl was symbolic of virginity and what is precious in women.

pearl. Between

Troy

Ilium was the name of the royal palace in Troy and a name for Troy in general.

Troy and where she lives is a wild and vast open sea. I am like a merchant, and this Pandarus is my uncertain hope, my protector, and my sailing vessel.
Alarum. Enter AENEAS.
An alarm sounds signaling a call to arms. AENEAS enters.
AENEAS
How now, Prince Troilus? Wherefore not afield?
AENEAS
What’s going on, Troilus? Why aren’t you on the battlefield?
TROILUS
Because not there. This woman’s answer sorts,
For womanish it is to be from thence.
110
What news, Aeneas, from the field today?
TROILUS
Because I’m not. It’s a woman’s answer, and I will act like a woman from here on out. What news has come from the battlefield today, Aeneas?
AENEAS  
That Paris is returnèd home, and hurt.
AENEAS
Paris has returned home and is injured.
TROILUS
By whom, Aeneas?
TROILUS
By whom, Aeneas?
AENEAS  
Troilus, by Menelaus.
AENEAS  
By Menelaus, Troilus.
TROILUS
Let Paris bleed. ’Tis but a scar to scorn;
115
Paris is gored with Menelaus’ horn.
TROILUS
Let Paris bleed. It’s just a scar in return for his scornful behavior, if Paris has been gouged with Menelaus’

horn

Paris stole Menelaus’s wife, Helen. Cuckolds, or men who have unfaithful wives, were said to grow horns.

horn.
Alarum.
An alarm sounds signaling a call to arms.
AENEAS
Hark what good sport is out of town today!
AENEAS
Listen, there’s good

sport

In this context, “sport” means fighting or entertainment.

sport outside the city walls today!
TROILUS
Better at home, if “would I might” were “may.”
But to the sport abroad. Are you bound thither?
TROILUS
I’d rather it take place at home, if I had my

wish

Here, Troilus uses “sport” to suggest he’d rather the entertainment take place at home with Cressida.

wish. But about the sport outside the city walls, are you going out there?
AENEAS
In all swift haste.
AENEAS
As quickly as possible.
TROILUS  
120
Come, go we then together.
TROILUS
Come, let’s go together then.
They exit.
They exit.

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Original Text

Modern Text
Enter PANDARUS and TROILUS.
PANDARUS and TROILUS enter.
TROILUS
Call here my varlet; I’ll unarm again.
Why should I war without the walls of Troy
That find such cruel battle here within?
Each Trojan that is master of his heart,
5
Let him to field; Troilus, alas, hath none.
TROILUS
Call my attendant; I’ll take my weapons off again. Why should I fight a war outside of the walls of Troy when there is such a cruel battle to fight within it? Each Trojan who is still master of his heart should fight; Troilus, alas, has no heart to fight.
PANDARUS
Will this gear ne’er be mended?
PANDARUS
Will this conflict ever be resolved?
TROILUS
The Greeks are strong and skilful to their strength,
Fierce to their skill, and to their fierceness valiant;
But I am weaker than a woman’s tear,
10
Tamer than sleep, fonder than ignorance,
Less valiant than the virgin in the night,
And skilless as unpracticed infancy.
TROILUS
The Greeks are strong and have a skill that matches their strength, a fierceness that matches their skill, and a bravery that matches their ferocity. But I am weaker than a woman’s tear, calmer than sleep, more devoted than ignorance, less brave than the virgin at night, and as uneducated as an untrained novice.
PANDARUS
Well, I have told you enough of this. For my
part, I’ll not meddle nor make no farther. He that will
15
have a cake out of the wheat must tarry the grinding.
PANDARUS
Well, I have spoken with you enough about this. For my part, I won’t have anything more to do with it than I already have. He who wants to bake a cake must be patient enough to grind the wheat into flour.
TROILUS
Have I not tarried?
TROILUS
Haven’t I been patient?
PANDARUS
Ay, the grinding; but you must tarry the
bolting.
PANDARUS
Yes, for the grinding, but you must also be patient enough to sift the flour.
TROILUS
Have I not tarried?
TROILUS
Haven’t I been patient?
PANDARUS
20
Ay, the bolting; but you must tarry the
leavening.
PANDARUS
Yes, for the sifting, but you must also be patient enough to let the cake rise.
TROILUS
Still have I tarried.
TROILUS
I’ve been patient about that, too.
PANDARUS
Ay, to the leavening; but here’s yet in the word
hereafter the kneading, the making of the cake, the
25
heating the oven, and the baking. Nay, you must stay
the cooling too, or you may chance burn your lips.
PANDARUS
Yes, to let the cake rise. But there’s more to do—kneading the dough, making the cake, heating the oven, and baking the cake. And then you must let it cool, or you might burn your lips.
TROILUS
Patience herself, what goddess e’er she be,
Doth lesser blench at suff’rance than I do.
At Priam’s royal table do I sit
30
And when fair Cressid comes into my thoughts—
So, traitor! “When she comes”? When is she
thence?
TROILUS
Patience herself, whatever goddess she may be, tolerates less suffering than I do. I sit at Priam’s royal table, and Cressida comes into my mind—I sound like a traitor of love! “When she comes into my mind”? When is she not in my thoughts?
PANDARUS
Well, she looked yesternight fairer than ever
I saw her look, or any woman else.
PANDARUS
Well, last night she looked more beautiful than I ever saw her, or any other woman, look.
TROILUS
35
I was about to tell thee: when my heart,
As wedgèd with a sigh, would rive in twain,
Lest Hector or my father should perceive me,
I have, as when the sun doth light a-scorn,
Buried this sigh in wrinkle of a smile;
40
But sorrow that is couched in seeming gladness
Is like that mirth fate turns to sudden sadness.
TROILUS
I was about to tell you: my heart felt as if it was being forced apart by a sigh, splitting in two, and so that Hector or my father wouldn’t notice, like the sun that lights up a storm, I covered my sigh with a smile. But sorrow disguised in happiness is like that joy that fate suddenly turns into sadness.
PANDARUS
An her hair were not somewhat darker than
Helen’s—well, go to—there were no more comparison
between the women. But, for my part, she is
45
my kinswoman; I would not, as they term it, praise
her, but I would somebody had heard her talk yesterday,
as I did. I will not dispraise your sister Cassandra’s
wit, but—
PANDARUS
If her hair were not a little darker than Helen’s—well, forget it then—there would be no comparing the women. But she is family to me; I don’t want to, as they say, praise her, but I wish someone had heard her talk yesterday, like I did. I will not insult your sister Cassandra’s intelligence, but —
TROILUS
O, Pandarus! I tell thee, Pandarus:
50
When I do tell thee there my hopes lie drowned,
Reply not in how many fathoms deep
They lie indrenched. I tell thee I am mad
In Cressid’s love. Thou answer’st she is fair;
Pourest in the open ulcer of my heart
55
Her eyes, her hair, her cheek, her gait, her voice;
Handiest in thy discourse—O—that her hand,
In whose comparison all whites are ink
Writing their own reproach, to whose soft seizure
The cygnet’s down is harsh, and spirit of sense
60
Hard as the palm of plowman. This thou tell’st me,
As true thou tell’st me, when I say I love her.
But, saying thus, instead of oil and balm
Thou lay’st in every gash that love hath given me
The knife that made it.
TROILUS
Oh Pandarus! I tell you, Pandarus: When I tell you that my hopes have drowned, don’t reply by telling me how many fathoms deep they are underwater. I tell you I am madly in love with Cressida, and you answer that she is beautiful, worsening the open sore in my heart with the thought of her eyes, her hair, her cheeks, the way she walks, her voice. You talk about her hand—oh, her beautiful hand, which is so white it makes all other whites seem like black ink, ink that writes about its failure to be as white as she, and which is so soft a young swan’s feathers seem as rough as a farmer’s hands. You say this to me, and it’s true, just as when I tell you I love her. But instead of soothing me with ointment and balm, your words are like a knife that cuts even deeper into the gash of my love for her.
PANDARUS
65
I speak no more than truth.
PANDARUS  
I only speak the truth.
TROILUS
Thou dost not speak so much.
TROILUS  
What you say doesn’t begin to express the truth.
PANDARUS  
Faith, I’ll not meddle in it. Let her be as she
is. If she be fair, ’tis the better for her; an she be
not, she has the mends in her own hands.
PANDARUS  
Rest assured, I won’t get involved. Let her be as she is. If she is beautiful, all the better for her. And if she’s not, she can figure things out for herself.
TROILUS  
70
Good Pandarus—how now, Pandarus?
TROILUS  
Good Pandarus—why so hasty?
PANDARUS  
I have had my labor for my travail, ill thought
on of her, and ill thought on of you; gone between
and between, but small thanks for my labor.
PANDARUS  
All I have to show for my hard work is pain; she and you both think badly of me. I have received very little thanks for my effort in getting involved with you two.
TROILUS
What, art thou angry, Pandarus? What, with
75
me?
TROILUS  
Wait, you are angry, Pandarus? Are you angry with me?
PANDARUS
Because she’s kin to me, therefore she’s not
so fair as Helen; an she were not kin to me, she
would be as fair o’ Friday as Helen is on Sunday.
But what care I? I care not an she were a blackamoor;
80
’tis all one to me.
PANDARUS
Because Cressida is family, I don’t want to brag, so I say she’s not as beautiful as Helen. But if she weren’t family, I would say she’s as beautiful on Friday as Helen is on

Sunday

Friday was a day of fasting, when women wore plain clothing. Sunday was a day when women looked their best, wearing their nicest clothing.

Sunday. But what do I care? I wouldn’t care if she was dark-skinned. It’s all the same to me.
TROILUS
Say I she is not fair?
TROILUS  
Am I saying she’s not fair-skinned?
PANDARUS  
I do not care whether you do or no. She’s a
fool to stay behind her father. Let her to the Greeks,
and so I’ll tell her the next time I see her. For my
85
part, I’ll meddle nor make no more i’ th’ matter.
PANDARUS  
I don’t care whether you do or don’t. She’s a fool to stay with her father. Let her go to the Greeks; I’ll tell her that the next time I see her. I’m not going to get involved in this matter anymore.
TROILUS  
Pandarus—
TROILUS  
Pandarus—
PANDARUS
Not I.
TROILUS
Sweet Pandarus—
PANDARUS
Pray you speak no more to me. I will leave
90
all as I found it, and there an end.
PANDARUS  
No, I’m not getting involved.
TROILUS
Sweet Pandarus—
PANDARUS  
Please don’t talk to me about it anymore. I will leave you two as I found you, and that’s that.
He exits.
Sounds alarum.
He exits.
An alarm sounds signaling a call to arms.
TROILUS
Peace, you ungracious clamors! Peace, rude sounds!
Fools on both sides! Helen must needs be fair
When with your blood you daily paint her thus.
I cannot fight upon this argument;
95
It is too starved a subject for my sword.
But Pandarus—O gods, how do you plague me!
I cannot come to Cressid but by Pandar,
And he’s as tetchy to be wooed to woo
As she is stubborn-chaste against all suit.
100
Tell me, Apollo, for thy Daphnes love,
What Cressid is, what Pandar, and what we.
Her bed is India; there she lies, a pearl.
Between our Ilium and where she resides,
Let it be called the wild and wand’ring flood,
105
Ourself the merchant, and this sailing Pandar
Our doubtful hope, our convoy, and our bark.
TROILUS
Quiet, rude noises! Quiet, harsh sounds! Both sides of this war are fools! Helen must be beautiful if she uses your blood as her makeup every day. I can’t fight for this cause. It’s too insignificant to draw my sword. But Pandarus—Oh gods, how you torture me! I cannot get to Cressida without Pandarus, and he’s as peevish at being a go-between as she is resistant to being courted.
Tell me, Apollo, given your experience with

Daphne

Apollo is one of the most revered and influential Greek and Roman gods. He had many love affairs, one of which was with Daphne, who, in an effort to escape him, turned into a shrub.

Daphne what do I do about Cressida, Pandarus, and all of this? Her bed is like

India

This refers to either the East or West Indies, a location far away that was thought to have great wealth and luxury.

India and she lies in it like a

pearl

A pearl was symbolic of virginity and what is precious in women.

pearl. Between

Troy

Ilium was the name of the royal palace in Troy and a name for Troy in general.

Troy and where she lives is a wild and vast open sea. I am like a merchant, and this Pandarus is my uncertain hope, my protector, and my sailing vessel.
Alarum. Enter AENEAS.
An alarm sounds signaling a call to arms. AENEAS enters.
AENEAS
How now, Prince Troilus? Wherefore not afield?
AENEAS
What’s going on, Troilus? Why aren’t you on the battlefield?
TROILUS
Because not there. This woman’s answer sorts,
For womanish it is to be from thence.
110
What news, Aeneas, from the field today?
TROILUS
Because I’m not. It’s a woman’s answer, and I will act like a woman from here on out. What news has come from the battlefield today, Aeneas?
AENEAS  
That Paris is returnèd home, and hurt.
AENEAS
Paris has returned home and is injured.
TROILUS
By whom, Aeneas?
TROILUS
By whom, Aeneas?
AENEAS  
Troilus, by Menelaus.
AENEAS  
By Menelaus, Troilus.
TROILUS
Let Paris bleed. ’Tis but a scar to scorn;
115
Paris is gored with Menelaus’ horn.
TROILUS
Let Paris bleed. It’s just a scar in return for his scornful behavior, if Paris has been gouged with Menelaus’

horn

Paris stole Menelaus’s wife, Helen. Cuckolds, or men who have unfaithful wives, were said to grow horns.

horn.
Alarum.
An alarm sounds signaling a call to arms.
AENEAS
Hark what good sport is out of town today!
AENEAS
Listen, there’s good

sport

In this context, “sport” means fighting or entertainment.

sport outside the city walls today!
TROILUS
Better at home, if “would I might” were “may.”
But to the sport abroad. Are you bound thither?
TROILUS
I’d rather it take place at home, if I had my

wish

Here, Troilus uses “sport” to suggest he’d rather the entertainment take place at home with Cressida.

wish. But about the sport outside the city walls, are you going out there?
AENEAS
In all swift haste.
AENEAS
As quickly as possible.
TROILUS  
120
Come, go we then together.
TROILUS
Come, let’s go together then.
They exit.
They exit.

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