As You Like It

William Shakespeare
No Fear Act 5 Scene 1
No Fear Act 5 Scene 1 Page 2

Original Text

Modern Text

WILLIAM

Five-and-twenty, sir.

WILLIAM

Twenty-five, sir.

TOUCHSTONE

A ripe age. Is thy name William?

TOUCHSTONE

A mature age. Is your name William?

WILLIAM

William, sir.

WILLIAM

Yes, it’s William, sir.

TOUCHSTONE

20A fair name. Wast born i' th' forest here?

TOUCHSTONE

A good name. Were you born here in the forest?

WILLIAM

Ay, sir, I thank God.

WILLIAM

Yes sir, thank God.

TOUCHSTONE

“Thank God.” A good answer. Art rich?

TOUCHSTONE

“Thank God”—that’s a good answer. Are you rich?

WILLIAM

'Faith, sir, so-so.

WILLIAM

Well, so-so.

TOUCHSTONE

“So-so” is good, very good, very excellent good. And yet it is not: it is but so-so. Art thou wise?

TOUCHSTONE

“So-so” is good, very good, an excellent answer. And then again, it’s not so good, but only so-so. Are you wise?

WILLIAM

Ay, sir, I have a pretty wit.

WILLIAM

Yes sir, I’m fairly witty.

TOUCHSTONE

Why, thou sayst well. I do now remember a saying: “The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.” The heathen philosopher, when he had a desire to eat a grape, would open his lips when he put it into his mouth, meaning thereby that grapes were made to eat and lips to open. You do love this maid?

TOUCHSTONE

Well, that’s a fine answer. I seem to remember a saying: “Only a fool thinks he’s wise; the

wise man

This line may be in response to William’s open-mouthed gape, but it’s also cruelly taunting the bumpkin for his narrow experience and how his “philosophy” derives only from that experience.

wise man
knows that he is, in fact, a fool.” When one self-described philosopher wanted to eat grapes, he opened his lips when they entered his mouth, thereby making the theoretical point that grapes were made to be eaten, and lips to open. Do you love this girl?

WILLIAM

I do, sir.

WILLIAM

I do, sir.

TOUCHSTONE

Give me your hand. Art thou learned?

TOUCHSTONE

Give me your hand. Are you educated?

WILLIAM

35No, sir.

WILLIAM

No, sir.