15 Questions Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them Needs to Answer

Can you believe it’s here? That it’s happening? On November 18th, we will wake up to a world where you can just GO SEE Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. You can just BUY A TICKET. You can sit in a theater and VIEW IT, WITH YOUR EYES. I’m trying not to get too excited here. I’m trying to manage my expectations. That said, if I am anything less than FLOORED, I will be extremely disappointed with cinema as a whole.

Also, I have questions. And for Fantastic Beasts to succeed in my estimation, it’ll need to answer AT LEAST most of them:

1. Is it significant that the movie takes place the same year Voldemort was born? It has to be. Tom Riddle was born December 21, 1926. The movie takes place in 1926. What are the odds?

2. Why was Newt Scamander expelled from Hogwarts? We know that his offense involved “endangering human life” with a beast, but I need specifics.

3. Why is Dumbledore so fond of Newt? He went so far as to argue against Newt’s expulsion from Hogwarts, and it can’t just be because he has tremendous hair.

4. Can Muggles do Side-Along Apparition? In this trailer, Newt tells his Muggle friend, Jacob, to put on a helmet, because his head is susceptible to breakage under immense force. It it because they’re about to Disapparate?

5. How did Porpetina lose her job as an Auror? Before the events of the film, Newt’s love interest, Tina, was a Dark wizard catcher. Presumably, something happened.

6. What kind of creature is ripping apart the streets of New York City? We’ve seen this happen in upwards of a billion trailers. Personally, I want it to be a ghost dragon.

7. What’s the situation overseas? As of this trailer, we know that Grindelwald is busy terrorizing people all over Europe. Are we dealing with the same level of despair and destruction as when Voldemort was calling the shots in the original series? Is it somehow worse?

8. Where do the Deathly Hallows fit into all of this? In one of the posters featuring Colin Firth and his beautiful face, the Deathly Hallows symbol is visible. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

9. How is the Lestrange family involved? Someone asked J.K. Rowling this question during a press conference, and I have no idea why. Apparently this person knows something I don’t. Even more suspicious is that Rowling refused to answer.

10. What’s up with Newt’s suitcase? It looks like it’s operating under your typical Undetectable Extension Charm, just like Hermione’s beaded handbag, except it also seems to be housing various other dimensions.

11. How did Tina’s sister Queenie become such an accomplished Legilimens? Legilimency (basically mind reading) comes across as something of a Dark Art. Dumbledore could do it, sure, but it’s a skill predominantly linked with people like Voldemort, Snape (he was undercover, but still), Bellatrix, and Draco Malfoy.

12. Why was Newt originally planning on being in New York City for only a few hours?

13. Is the New Salem Philanthropic Society related to the Scourers? In the trailers, we get to see this group of fanatical Muggles (also known as the Second Salemers) actively rallying against witches and wizards. As stated on Pottermore, the Scourers were magical mercenaries who were turning over their fellow wizards during the witch hunts in America in the seventeenth century. Is there a connection?

14. WILL WE GET FLASHBACKS TO NEWT’S TIME AT HOGWARTS? BECAUSE IF WE DO, I’LL CRY.

15. What is going on with Ezra Miller? And I’m not just talking about his hair, which is the greatest hair-related crime ever committed on record. What we know for sure is that he’s the adoptive son of Mary Lou, the woman leading the Second Salemers. Is he a wizard? I haven’t seen him doing magic. Also, the word “adoptive” seems key. This is Rey from Star Wars all over again. WHO ARE HIS BIOLOGICAL PARENTS? I BET THEY’RE IMPORTANT.

As if an entire movie isn’t enough, you can also pre-order the screenplay, available November 18th!