No Fear Shakespeare: Twelfth Night: Act 2 Scene 3

Read and listen with a SparkNotes PLUS trial!

No Fear Translations

No Fear Audio

Already have an account? Log in

Original Text	Modern Text
Enter SIR TOBY BELCH and SIR ANDREW	RIS BYTO HCBEL dna ISR WARDNE rntee.
SIR TOBY BELCH Approach, Sir Andrew. Not to be abed after midnight is to be up betimes, and diluculo surgere, thou knowst,	RSI BYTO HCELB Come on, Sri Awrned. If ewer ilstl ekawa erfta dhinitmg, hnet erew up arlye in eht nognrmi. And teh tcrodso sya sti tehyahl to gte up relya
SIR ANDREW Nay, my troth, I know not. But I know to be up late is to be up late.	RIS RENWDA I dtno nkwo thaw eht octdrso ysa. llA I wkno is htat gasinty up laet is atngysi up etal.
SIR TOBY BELCH A false conclusion. I hate it as an unfilled can. To be up after midnight and to go to bed then, is early, so that to go to bed after midnight is to go to bed betimes. Does not our life consist of the four elements?	IRS BOYT ECLBH A lefas olonusncic. I ehat royu cilgo as umhc as I haet an eptmy ngriidnk cpu. yginaSt up rteaf ihmnitdg seamn ahtt uyo go to dbe fetar tihnmdig, in het eew uhsro of het inmnorg, ciwhh is aryle. So tis ilke ggino to bde ryela. nIst vydeorybe dmae up of the oruf terltenemaehs, tware, eirf, and ari?
SIR ANDREW Faith, so they say, but I think it rather consists of eating and drinking.	IRS DERANW thsTa tahw tyeh asy, btu I tihkn ielf tnsocsis of doof nda ozebo.
SIR TOBY BELCH Thourt a scholar. Let us therefore eat and drink. Marian, I say! A stoup of wine!	RSI YBTO LHCBE erYuo a amtsr guy. So we ushldo eta nad drikn. Maira! Bigrn us seom inew!
Enter FOOL	eTh OFOL nseret.
SIR ANDREW Here comes the fool, i faith.	IRS NDEWAR ookL, ehre smoec eth oolf.
FOOL How now, my hearts! Did you never see the picture of We 15 Three?	OOFL eloHl, my fsenidr! htWa a pytetr trcpeui, rthee flsoo all etrhoteg.
SIR TOBY BELCH Welcome, ass. Now lets have a catch.	ISR YOBT LCEBH eHlol, yuo itdoi. Sgin us a osng.
SIR ANDREW By my troth, the fool has an excellent breast. I had rather than forty shillings I had such a leg, and so sweet a breath to sing, as the fool has.(to the FOOL) In sooth, thou wast in very gracious fooling last night when thou spokest of Pigrogromitus, of the Vapians passing the equinoctial of Queubus. Twas very good, i faith. I sent thee sixpence for thy leman. Hadst it?	IRS WANEDR I sewar, htsi lfoo ash an xeenltcel insgign evoci. Id iveg ytofr isgilhlns to aevh hsi cnie segl nad hsi blufiueta ceivo. (to eth FOOL) oFlo, ouy ewre yrev funyn aslt hitgn lkngtia ttha csalgolatori seeonnns sTehe rea ennsenos wdrso ttah nousd ilke astrology. astrological esenosnn taubo torgurmioiPsg nda eht asinapV ingpass het xnqouei of uuQsebu. eyrV sgamnui. I enst uoy oesm oemny to nspde on uyor grflidnire. Did uoy egt it?
FOOL I did impeticos thy gratillity, for Malvolios nose is no whipstock. My lady has a white hand, and the Myrmidons are no bottle-ale houses.	OOLF I evag ruyo lteilt npsrete to my nliigrrdef eeasbuc uyo acnt gte a gpir on loovalisM osen to iwph yuro rhsoe tiwh it. My defrriilng sah euflbutai htiwe snhda, and terga wsiarrro tarne mmo-adn-ppo sdneir This is emor snonsene to asemu rSi Andrew. mom-and-pop diners, yuo wnok.
SIR ANDREW Excellent! Why, this is the best fooling when all is done. Now, a song.	IRS NRDEAW Ha, ha! I oelv it ehwn oyu tlka neseshtstnnao thwa oslfo slhoud do. meCo on nwo, snig for us.
SIR TOBY BELCH (giving money to the FOOL) 30 Come on. There is sixpence for you. Lets have a song.	SIR YBOT LCHBE (gngvii het FOOL ymnoe) Yes, moce on. esHre pcixnsee ofr yuo. sLet hera a nogs.
SIR ANDREW (giving money to the FOOL) Theres a testril of me too. If one knight give a	ISR RWDNEA (givngi eht OFLO emnyo) eeHrs semtonihg fmro me oto. If eon nkhigt vsieg
FOOL Would you have a love song or a song of good life?	FOOL ouldW ouy hetrra ehra a oevl osng or a snog atubo hte oodg eifl?
SIR TOBY BELCH A love song, a love song.	IRS BYTO HELCB A vleo gnos, a vleo sgon.
SIR ANDREW 35 Ay, ay. I care not for good life.	RSI RNDEAW seY, yse. Im ont sdenreetti in gneib dogo.
FOOL (sings) O mistress mine, where are you roaming? O, stay and hear! Your true loves coming, That can sing both high and low: Trip no further, pretty sweeting. Journeys end in lovers meeting, Every wise mans son doth know.	LOFO (he ginss) Oh my lovre, rhwee era ouy orgiman? ySta nda istnel! Yuro teru esolv omcign, eht oen how acn sgni otbh high nda low: tDon armo yan rfrehtu, typert arinlgd. uorY noyurej nsde hwen you etem a lorve, as ryvee eswi nmas nso nokws.
SIR ANDREW Excellent good, i faith.	SRI NAEDRW tTha swa ellxnctee, aryell xetlelcne.
SIR TOBY BELCH Good, good.	ISR BOTY ELBCH Gdoo, rvye dgoo.
FOOL (sings) What is love? Tis not hereafter. Present mirth hath present laughter. Whats to come is still unsure. In delay there lies no plenty. Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty. Youths a stuff will not endure.	OLOF (ignsngi) athW is oevl? It stin in eht terufu. heWn ueroy givnha nfu onw, oyure gaiuhlgn htgir nwo. The urefstu uunser, dan ehsret no rsneao to twsea ietm. eoCm isks me ewilh yuore teynwt. You ontw be unyog rvoeerf.
SIR ANDREW A mellifluous voice, as I am true knight.	RSI REDWNA A luuitbfea vcoei, I wresa.
SIR TOBY BELCH A contagious breath.	SRI BTOY LBECH Hsi rbteah ksints.
SIR ANDREW Very sweet and contagious, i faith.	SIR ADERNW esY, it ssntki very syewtel.
SIR TOBY BELCH To hear by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion. But shall we make the welkin dance indeed? Shall we rouse the night owl in a catch that will draw three souls out of one weaver? Shall we do that?	RIS BOTY HCBEL If we uldco teilns to hmi twhi rou essno, we oluwd tifydilnee ysa he knstsi yrev lysteew. So atwh do uoy asy, ohdsul we sgni ould hngueo to khaes hte asvnhee? ulhSod we sgin a onurd to kaew up teh tgnih wol? oudShl we do atth?
SIR ANDREW An you love me, lets do t. I am dog at a catch.	SRI RADEWN tLse go for it. Im a ervy gdoo rgesin, nad acn nsig usnrod ielk a odg ogd = expert dog.
FOOL 60 By r lady, sir, and some dogs will catch well.	LFOO nehT oylul be dogo at taychc usent. Dsog ekil to lpay chcat.
SIR ANDREW Most certain. Let our catch be Thou Knave.	IRS RDWNAE ysouetlbAl. tseL nedac to You rJke.
FOOL Hold thy peace, thou knave, knight? I shall be constrained in t to call thee knave, knight.	LOOF You mena, Shut up, ouy rkej? Tthsa teh gosn erhwe teh igernss allc ehac etohr rkejs, higrt? So llI be refcod to acll uyo a ejrk, riS enwrAd.
SIR ANDREW Tis not the first time I have constrained one to call me 65 knave. Begin, Fool. It begins Hold thy peace.	IRS NREWAD It twon be the rstfi etim emenoso was oecfdr to call me hatt. uoY tstra, Floo. It trsats, htuS up.
FOOL I shall never begin if I hold my peace.	FOLO lIl veren be ealb to rttsa if I suth up.
SIR ANDREW Good, i faith. Come, begin.	SIR DRENAW thTas uetr. But ceom on, arstt.
Catch sung	Thye isng.
Enter MARIA	AAMRI setnre.
MARIA What a caterwauling do you keep here! If my lady have not called up her steward Malvolio and bid him turn you out of doors, never trust me.	IRAAM eouYr kniagm a rieerbtl arkcet tuo erhe! yLad Ovliai otdl rhe srnetva Mllaovoi to kikc yuo otu of teh sehuo. I rewsa tsi etur.
SIR TOBY BELCH My ladys a Cataian. We are politicians, Malvolios a Peg- a-Ramsey, and (sings) Three merry men be we.Am not I consanguineous? Am I not of her blood? Tillyvally! Lady! (sings) There dwelt a man in Babylon, lady, lady!	SIR YTOB HCLEB adyL Ovliia acn go to ihCan orf lla I earc. Wree yver mrtas ygsu, and losalMivo etilLt Bo epeP. (he nsgis) Were jsut hvigna omse fun.reAtn I erh aivrleet, tefra all? Arent we tdeeral? ilddeF-eed-dee, dLay! (igsnign) reehT divel a mna in alybonB, dayl, lyda!
FOOL 75 Beshrew me, the knights in admirable fooling.	OFOL Ghso, hte hgnkist ryev oogd at cating eilk a loof.
SIR ANDREW Ay, he does well enough if he be disposed, and so do I too. He does it with a better grace, but I do it more natural.	RIS NWDARE sYe, esh good at it ehnw she in teh omod, nda so am I. Hes rcecpaitd oemr, ubt it msoce mero ytaalulrn to me.
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) O the twelfth day of December	SRI YTBO CBLEH (he isgsn) On het ftwthle yda of ermbDcee
MARIA For the love o God, peace!	AAIRM oFr dsGo akes, tsuh up!
Enter MALVOLIO	OLLOAVIM strnee.
MALVOLIO My masters, are you mad? Or what are you? Have you no wit, manners, nor honesty but to gabble like tinkers at this time of night? Do you make an alehouse of my ladys house, that you squeak out your coziers catches without any mitigation or remorse of voice? Is there no respect of place, persons, nor time in you?	VLLAMOIO Aer ouy lla zrcay? tsaWh gonrw wtih ouy? rAe oyu niagmk all ihst nsoie at stih teim of gtnih ebucaes yuo hvae no msnnrae, or asebcue eoruy ujts tupsid? Are uyo nrtygi to rntu my seistsmsr uoseh inot a nioys bra? Is taht ywh oyeru asgqnluei tuo heets ruiuiocsdl agrulv ossgn owtihtu gnerowil ouyr esicov at lal? Dnot you haev any pcreste orf hatnying?
SIR TOBY BELCH We did keep time, sir, in our catches. Sneck up!	SRI OTYB BHLCE We teedrscpe het teab of eth ogsn, irs. So shtu up!
MALVOLIO Sir Toby, I must be round with you. My lady bade me tell you, that, though she harbors you as her kinsman, shes nothing allied to your disorders. If you can separate yourself and your misdemeanors, you are welcome to the house. If not, an it would please you to take leave of her, she is very willing to bid you farewell.	AOMVOILL rSi Tyob, eIv got to be fnark twhi yuo. My dlya tdlo me to llet uyo hatt lihwe esh tsel oyu ayts at rhe eouhs ceaesbu eoyru a eivatelr, hes edsont prevaop of yuor varoehbi. If ouy nca eapsh up, yuroe eeomcwl to ysta in teh euohs. If you nact, and lwduo rpfree to eevla, essh evry liwlgin to ysa gbdoeoy to you.
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) Farewell, dear heart, since I must needs be gone.	RIS BYTO CELBH (he isgsn In isht line nad hte lnglfwooi leins, irS oTyb nad eht lofo rea ingsnig aostavinri on teh lycris of a lppaour nosg of eht day. sings ) dogoithnG, ertsehaetw, Im gigno to levea yuo won.
MARIA Nay, good Sir Toby.	AARMI No, ogod riS Tybo.
FOOL (sings) His eyes do show his days are almost done.	OFLO (nngiigs) oYu can llte rmfo his yees atth his elfi is msaotl rvoe.
MALVOLIO Is t even so?	MLAVOIOL Is tshi owh its ngoig to be?
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) But I will never die.	SRI BYTO CEHLB (nngsigi) Btu I ilwl enrve edi.
FOOL (sings) Sir Toby, there you lie.	FOOL (giisngn) Sri yoTb, ahtst a lei.
MALVOLIO This is much credit to you.	OIVOLMLA Tihs vioehabr eyarll asemk uoy olko aegtr.
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) Shall I bid him go?	RIS OYTB HLCEB (ignnisg) dhuloS I ltle mhi to go?
FOOL (sings) What an if you do?	OLFO (gnsngii) Wtha if y,ou do?
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) Shall I bid him go, and spare not?	SIR TYBO LCHEB (gnising) louSdh I tlle mhi to go, nda be ashrh ihtw mih?
FOOL (sings) O no, no, no, no, you dare not.	LOOF (inigngs) Oh no, no, no, no, tndo uyo read.
SIR TOBY BELCH Out o tune, sir. You lie. Art any more than a steward? Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?	SIR TOYB BCHLE Tsath uot of netu, irs. uoY eil. (to OLOIAVML) Yuero tihnong erom than a entvars ehre. Do you khnit atth tjus auebecs ruoye a dogyo wto soshe, no eno esel anc yoenj flhsemi?
FOOL Yes, by Saint Anne, and ginger shall be hot i the mouth too.	FOOL hTey ianytlrec wlil. llhyTe vahe oldube speglnhi, oto.
SIR TOBY BELCH Thourt i the right. Go, sir, rub your chain with crumbs. A stoup of wine, Maria!	RIS OTBY LHCEB rYoue rithg. (to MALVOLIO) Go ihslpo oyur tdsswrae ihnca, ris. araiM, bigrn us some niwe!
MALVOLIO Mistress Mary, if you prized my ladys favor at anything more than contempt, you would not give means for this uncivil rule. She shall know of it, by this hand.	OAVOLLIM ssMi yMar, if ouy darce waht Ldya liaOiv nhitsk aotbu oyu at all, you dwnotlu oiutbcernt to htsi udre hvreaiob. I ursase yuo, slhle ndfi tuo autob htis.
Exit	MLIOVLOA exsti.
MARIA Go shake your ears!	RAAMI Go dna egliwg uroy raes!
SIR ANDREW Twere as good a deed as to drink when a mans a-hungry, to challenge him the field and then to break promise with him and make a fool of him.	SRI ADWERN heTsre gohtnni Id vleo eomr hant to amke a oofl uto of tath gyu oewsomh. I oudlc lhnleagec him to a dlue nda thne tno owsh up. Ttah wludo do hte rktci.
SIR TOBY BELCH Do t, knight. Ill write thee a challenge. Or Ill deliver thy indignation to him by word of mouth.	IRS OTYB LCEHB Do hatt. lIl ewrit a tterel elicgannhgl imh to a leud on uroy helfba. Or lIl reveild uoyr ustsinl to his caef.
MARIA Sweet Sir Toby, be patient for tonight. Since the youth of the counts was today with thy lady, she is much out of quiet. For Monsieur Malvolio, let me alone with him. If I do not gull him into a nayword and make him a common recreation, do not think I have wit enough to lie straight in my bed. I know I can do it.	IMRAA Daer Sri Tybo, dton do nytnghai ahsr httgoin. rvEe eincs eht euskD essmgeenr tvdeisi alviOi, hses eenb pteus. As fro eosriMun Maolivol, lte me keat ecra of imh. llI mkae a igb lfoo tuo of him, jstu tstru me. Ill kmea him fuosam rof his typtidius. orEenyve ilwl lauhg at mih. I know I anc do it.
SIR TOBY BELCH 125 Possess us, possess us, tell us something of him.	SRI TBOY LBEHC eTll us otghnesim uobat mih. Coem on, llet us gimestonh.
MARIA Marry, sir, sometimes he is a kind of puritan.	RMIAA Well, imsmsteeo he tcsa ilek a yoogd tow hesos.
SIR ANDREW O, if I thought that, Id beat him like a dog!	RIS AREWND Oh, llI beat mih up orf atth!
SIR TOBY BELCH What, for being a puritan? Thy exquisite reason, dear knight?	ISR OYBT BLECH oYeur ggnoi to baet him up fro gineb ogod? And hwast yuor ilntlabir rsonea fro ahtt, aelsep?
SIR ANDREW I have no exquisite reason for t, but I have reason good enough.	ISR RWENAD I ntdo veha nya nrblltiai soaern ofr it, tub I have a odgo oeguhn onaers.
MARIA The devil a puritan that he is, or anything constantly, but a time-pleaser; an affectioned ass that cons state without book and utters it by great swarths; the best persuaded of himself, so crammed, as he thinks, with excellencies, that it is his grounds of faith that all that look on him love him. And on that vice in him will my revenge find notable cause to work.	AIRMA He ntsi lraeyl atth urpe nda godo. seH sjtu a icntoecde frtetarle. sHe a etrsetinpuo yug hwo erpisas to speak adn act ilek iotlbyin. seH odrup, and he tnihsk seh so udfefst full of lenourwdf liiatqesu ttah eyenreov levos imh. hstaT eth awsesnek Ill seu to teg regneev on him.
SIR TOBY BELCH What wilt thou do?	RIS TYOB LBEHC taWh era you iongg to do?
MARIA I will drop in his way some obscure epistles of love, wherein by the color of his beard, the shape of his leg, the manner of his gait, the expressure of his eye, forehead, and complexion,he shall find himself most feelingly personated.	AARMI lIl ordp esmo orutyesmsi leov lestert in ihs hpta. lHle nhkti tyeehr dsdesdear to mih, ebceasu letlhy ibdecser het locro of sih daber, eth haesp of hsi lsge, teh ayw he kslwa, nda the sxeornpeis on ihs aefc. I cna meka my ridngwhaitn olko tusj keil yadL iivalOs: seh
I can write very like my lady your niece: on a forgotten matter we can hardly make distinction of our hands.	dan I anct llet het fenefedirc eebtnew echa rseoht dinrgawhtni.
SIR TOBY BELCH Excellent! I smell a device.	RIS OTBY CHBLE Eetlnlexc! Sunsdo iekl euvoy otg a dgoo irkct in idnm.
SIR ANDREW 145 I have t in my nose too.	IRS WDAREN I ilke it too.
SIR TOBY BELCH He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt drop, that they come from my niece, and that shes in love with him.	ISR BYTO LBECH leHl tihnk eseht estretl rea orfm iOliva nda atth hses in eolv hwti imh.
MARIA My purpose is, indeed, a horse of that color.	RAAMI Yes, hatts eht eadi.
SIR ANDREW And your horse now would make him an ass.	RIS NAWDRE Hes oggni to kool klei a oaltt ditoi.
MARIA 150 Ass, I doubt not.	ARAIM selbytouAl, uyo iiotd.
SIR ANDREW Oh, twill be admirable!	SRI WRDAEN This is oggin to be rtaeg!
MARIA Sport royal, I warrant you. I know my physic will work with him. I will plant you two, and let the fool make a third, where he shall find the letter. Observe his construction of it. For this night, to bed, and dream on the event. Farewell.	MIAAR tIs gongi to be nfu, I presiom. I wokn my mieincde liwl krow on hmi. Ill vhea uoy tow dhadnie teh lfoo igtrooth wrehe hell fidn the erlett. atchW hsi craentio. aehiMnwel, tesl go to bde adn earmd btoua hsit. dGoo thgni.
Exit	RAMAI ietsx.
SIR TOBY BELCH Good night, Penthesilea.	IRS TOYB CHBEL oGdo inght, yuo mzianag aomwn, uoy.
SIR ANDREW Before me, shes a good wench.	SRI DANWER ehsS a nief wnmoa, all ihgtr.
SIR TOBY BELCH Shes a beagle, true-bred, and one that adores me. What o that?	RIS TBYO LEHCB hSse a ogdo itltle mowna, nad hes oadsre me. Wtha tabou it?
SIR ANDREW 160 I was adored once too.	RSI DRANEW oomneSe aedrdo me ocen, oot.
SIR TOBY BELCH Lets to bed, knight. Thou hadst need send for more money.	RSI YOTB LEBHC sLte go to ebd, hntigk. orToorwm yuo nede to gte roem nmeoy tens to ouy.
SIR ANDREW If I cannot recover your niece, I am a foul way out.	RSI EANRDW If I catn easdrupe oyur ieenc to mrrya me, Im oggni to be in msoe issreuo aclainfin bruolet.
SIR TOBY BELCH Send for money, knight. If thou hast her not i the end, call me Cut.	SRI OYTB LHECB etG yruo hdans on osem oymen and tvregienhy illw be lla tighr. I ownk ollyu niw roev Ovalii in teh den.
SIR ANDREW 165 If I do not, never trust me, take it how you will.	SIR AWENRD I kwon I lwli too, if tsi teh tlas ighnt I do.
SIR TOBY BELCH Come, come, Ill go burn some sack. Tis too late to go to bed now. Come, knight. Come, knight.	RSI TOYB LHCEB eomC on, lIl go armw up a einc asgls of yhserr rof us. Its oot elta to go to ebd now. omCe on, my fdrine, come on.
Exeunt	Teyh tiex.

Original Text	Modern Text
Enter SIR TOBY BELCH and SIR ANDREW	RIS BYTO HCBEL dna ISR WARDNE rntee.
SIR TOBY BELCH Approach, Sir Andrew. Not to be abed after midnight is to be up betimes, and diluculo surgere, thou knowst,	RSI BYTO HCELB Come on, Sri Awrned. If ewer ilstl ekawa erfta dhinitmg, hnet erew up arlye in eht nognrmi. And teh tcrodso sya sti tehyahl to gte up relya
SIR ANDREW Nay, my troth, I know not. But I know to be up late is to be up late.	RIS RENWDA I dtno nkwo thaw eht octdrso ysa. llA I wkno is htat gasinty up laet is atngysi up etal.
SIR TOBY BELCH A false conclusion. I hate it as an unfilled can. To be up after midnight and to go to bed then, is early, so that to go to bed after midnight is to go to bed betimes. Does not our life consist of the four elements?	IRS BOYT ECLBH A lefas olonusncic. I ehat royu cilgo as umhc as I haet an eptmy ngriidnk cpu. yginaSt up rteaf ihmnitdg seamn ahtt uyo go to dbe fetar tihnmdig, in het eew uhsro of het inmnorg, ciwhh is aryle. So tis ilke ggino to bde ryela. nIst vydeorybe dmae up of the oruf terltenemaehs, tware, eirf, and ari?
SIR ANDREW Faith, so they say, but I think it rather consists of eating and drinking.	IRS DERANW thsTa tahw tyeh asy, btu I tihkn ielf tnsocsis of doof nda ozebo.
SIR TOBY BELCH Thourt a scholar. Let us therefore eat and drink. Marian, I say! A stoup of wine!	RSI YBTO LHCBE erYuo a amtsr guy. So we ushldo eta nad drikn. Maira! Bigrn us seom inew!
Enter FOOL	eTh OFOL nseret.
SIR ANDREW Here comes the fool, i faith.	IRS NDEWAR ookL, ehre smoec eth oolf.
FOOL How now, my hearts! Did you never see the picture of We 15 Three?	OOFL eloHl, my fsenidr! htWa a pytetr trcpeui, rthee flsoo all etrhoteg.
SIR TOBY BELCH Welcome, ass. Now lets have a catch.	ISR YOBT LCEBH eHlol, yuo itdoi. Sgin us a osng.
SIR ANDREW By my troth, the fool has an excellent breast. I had rather than forty shillings I had such a leg, and so sweet a breath to sing, as the fool has.(to the FOOL) In sooth, thou wast in very gracious fooling last night when thou spokest of Pigrogromitus, of the Vapians passing the equinoctial of Queubus. Twas very good, i faith. I sent thee sixpence for thy leman. Hadst it?	IRS WANEDR I sewar, htsi lfoo ash an xeenltcel insgign evoci. Id iveg ytofr isgilhlns to aevh hsi cnie segl nad hsi blufiueta ceivo. (to eth FOOL) oFlo, ouy ewre yrev funyn aslt hitgn lkngtia ttha csalgolatori seeonnns sTehe rea ennsenos wdrso ttah nousd ilke astrology. astrological esenosnn taubo torgurmioiPsg nda eht asinapV ingpass het xnqouei of uuQsebu. eyrV sgamnui. I enst uoy oesm oemny to nspde on uyor grflidnire. Did uoy egt it?
FOOL I did impeticos thy gratillity, for Malvolios nose is no whipstock. My lady has a white hand, and the Myrmidons are no bottle-ale houses.	OOLF I evag ruyo lteilt npsrete to my nliigrrdef eeasbuc uyo acnt gte a gpir on loovalisM osen to iwph yuro rhsoe tiwh it. My defrriilng sah euflbutai htiwe snhda, and terga wsiarrro tarne mmo-adn-ppo sdneir This is emor snonsene to asemu rSi Andrew. mom-and-pop diners, yuo wnok.
SIR ANDREW Excellent! Why, this is the best fooling when all is done. Now, a song.	IRS NRDEAW Ha, ha! I oelv it ehwn oyu tlka neseshtstnnao thwa oslfo slhoud do. meCo on nwo, snig for us.
SIR TOBY BELCH (giving money to the FOOL) 30 Come on. There is sixpence for you. Lets have a song.	SIR YBOT LCHBE (gngvii het FOOL ymnoe) Yes, moce on. esHre pcixnsee ofr yuo. sLet hera a nogs.
SIR ANDREW (giving money to the FOOL) Theres a testril of me too. If one knight give a	ISR RWDNEA (givngi eht OFLO emnyo) eeHrs semtonihg fmro me oto. If eon nkhigt vsieg
FOOL Would you have a love song or a song of good life?	FOOL ouldW ouy hetrra ehra a oevl osng or a snog atubo hte oodg eifl?
SIR TOBY BELCH A love song, a love song.	IRS BYTO HELCB A vleo gnos, a vleo sgon.
SIR ANDREW 35 Ay, ay. I care not for good life.	RSI RNDEAW seY, yse. Im ont sdenreetti in gneib dogo.
FOOL (sings) O mistress mine, where are you roaming? O, stay and hear! Your true loves coming, That can sing both high and low: Trip no further, pretty sweeting. Journeys end in lovers meeting, Every wise mans son doth know.	LOFO (he ginss) Oh my lovre, rhwee era ouy orgiman? ySta nda istnel! Yuro teru esolv omcign, eht oen how acn sgni otbh high nda low: tDon armo yan rfrehtu, typert arinlgd. uorY noyurej nsde hwen you etem a lorve, as ryvee eswi nmas nso nokws.
SIR ANDREW Excellent good, i faith.	SRI NAEDRW tTha swa ellxnctee, aryell xetlelcne.
SIR TOBY BELCH Good, good.	ISR BOTY ELBCH Gdoo, rvye dgoo.
FOOL (sings) What is love? Tis not hereafter. Present mirth hath present laughter. Whats to come is still unsure. In delay there lies no plenty. Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty. Youths a stuff will not endure.	OLOF (ignsngi) athW is oevl? It stin in eht terufu. heWn ueroy givnha nfu onw, oyure gaiuhlgn htgir nwo. The urefstu uunser, dan ehsret no rsneao to twsea ietm. eoCm isks me ewilh yuore teynwt. You ontw be unyog rvoeerf.
SIR ANDREW A mellifluous voice, as I am true knight.	RSI REDWNA A luuitbfea vcoei, I wresa.
SIR TOBY BELCH A contagious breath.	SRI BTOY LBECH Hsi rbteah ksints.
SIR ANDREW Very sweet and contagious, i faith.	SIR ADERNW esY, it ssntki very syewtel.
SIR TOBY BELCH To hear by the nose, it is dulcet in contagion. But shall we make the welkin dance indeed? Shall we rouse the night owl in a catch that will draw three souls out of one weaver? Shall we do that?	RIS BOTY HCBEL If we uldco teilns to hmi twhi rou essno, we oluwd tifydilnee ysa he knstsi yrev lysteew. So atwh do uoy asy, ohdsul we sgni ould hngueo to khaes hte asvnhee? ulhSod we sgin a onurd to kaew up teh tgnih wol? oudShl we do atth?
SIR ANDREW An you love me, lets do t. I am dog at a catch.	SRI RADEWN tLse go for it. Im a ervy gdoo rgesin, nad acn nsig usnrod ielk a odg ogd = expert dog.
FOOL 60 By r lady, sir, and some dogs will catch well.	LFOO nehT oylul be dogo at taychc usent. Dsog ekil to lpay chcat.
SIR ANDREW Most certain. Let our catch be Thou Knave.	IRS RDWNAE ysouetlbAl. tseL nedac to You rJke.
FOOL Hold thy peace, thou knave, knight? I shall be constrained in t to call thee knave, knight.	LOOF You mena, Shut up, ouy rkej? Tthsa teh gosn erhwe teh igernss allc ehac etohr rkejs, higrt? So llI be refcod to acll uyo a ejrk, riS enwrAd.
SIR ANDREW Tis not the first time I have constrained one to call me 65 knave. Begin, Fool. It begins Hold thy peace.	IRS NREWAD It twon be the rstfi etim emenoso was oecfdr to call me hatt. uoY tstra, Floo. It trsats, htuS up.
FOOL I shall never begin if I hold my peace.	FOLO lIl veren be ealb to rttsa if I suth up.
SIR ANDREW Good, i faith. Come, begin.	SIR DRENAW thTas uetr. But ceom on, arstt.
Catch sung	Thye isng.
Enter MARIA	AAMRI setnre.
MARIA What a caterwauling do you keep here! If my lady have not called up her steward Malvolio and bid him turn you out of doors, never trust me.	IRAAM eouYr kniagm a rieerbtl arkcet tuo erhe! yLad Ovliai otdl rhe srnetva Mllaovoi to kikc yuo otu of teh sehuo. I rewsa tsi etur.
SIR TOBY BELCH My ladys a Cataian. We are politicians, Malvolios a Peg- a-Ramsey, and (sings) Three merry men be we.Am not I consanguineous? Am I not of her blood? Tillyvally! Lady! (sings) There dwelt a man in Babylon, lady, lady!	SIR YTOB HCLEB adyL Ovliia acn go to ihCan orf lla I earc. Wree yver mrtas ygsu, and losalMivo etilLt Bo epeP. (he nsgis) Were jsut hvigna omse fun.reAtn I erh aivrleet, tefra all? Arent we tdeeral? ilddeF-eed-dee, dLay! (igsnign) reehT divel a mna in alybonB, dayl, lyda!
FOOL 75 Beshrew me, the knights in admirable fooling.	OFOL Ghso, hte hgnkist ryev oogd at cating eilk a loof.
SIR ANDREW Ay, he does well enough if he be disposed, and so do I too. He does it with a better grace, but I do it more natural.	RIS NWDARE sYe, esh good at it ehnw she in teh omod, nda so am I. Hes rcecpaitd oemr, ubt it msoce mero ytaalulrn to me.
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) O the twelfth day of December	SRI YTBO CBLEH (he isgsn) On het ftwthle yda of ermbDcee
MARIA For the love o God, peace!	AAIRM oFr dsGo akes, tsuh up!
Enter MALVOLIO	OLLOAVIM strnee.
MALVOLIO My masters, are you mad? Or what are you? Have you no wit, manners, nor honesty but to gabble like tinkers at this time of night? Do you make an alehouse of my ladys house, that you squeak out your coziers catches without any mitigation or remorse of voice? Is there no respect of place, persons, nor time in you?	VLLAMOIO Aer ouy lla zrcay? tsaWh gonrw wtih ouy? rAe oyu niagmk all ihst nsoie at stih teim of gtnih ebucaes yuo hvae no msnnrae, or asebcue eoruy ujts tupsid? Are uyo nrtygi to rntu my seistsmsr uoseh inot a nioys bra? Is taht ywh oyeru asgqnluei tuo heets ruiuiocsdl agrulv ossgn owtihtu gnerowil ouyr esicov at lal? Dnot you haev any pcreste orf hatnying?
SIR TOBY BELCH We did keep time, sir, in our catches. Sneck up!	SRI OTYB BHLCE We teedrscpe het teab of eth ogsn, irs. So shtu up!
MALVOLIO Sir Toby, I must be round with you. My lady bade me tell you, that, though she harbors you as her kinsman, shes nothing allied to your disorders. If you can separate yourself and your misdemeanors, you are welcome to the house. If not, an it would please you to take leave of her, she is very willing to bid you farewell.	AOMVOILL rSi Tyob, eIv got to be fnark twhi yuo. My dlya tdlo me to llet uyo hatt lihwe esh tsel oyu ayts at rhe eouhs ceaesbu eoyru a eivatelr, hes edsont prevaop of yuor varoehbi. If ouy nca eapsh up, yuroe eeomcwl to ysta in teh euohs. If you nact, and lwduo rpfree to eevla, essh evry liwlgin to ysa gbdoeoy to you.
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) Farewell, dear heart, since I must needs be gone.	RIS BYTO CELBH (he isgsn In isht line nad hte lnglfwooi leins, irS oTyb nad eht lofo rea ingsnig aostavinri on teh lycris of a lppaour nosg of eht day. sings ) dogoithnG, ertsehaetw, Im gigno to levea yuo won.
MARIA Nay, good Sir Toby.	AARMI No, ogod riS Tybo.
FOOL (sings) His eyes do show his days are almost done.	OFLO (nngiigs) oYu can llte rmfo his yees atth his elfi is msaotl rvoe.
MALVOLIO Is t even so?	MLAVOIOL Is tshi owh its ngoig to be?
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) But I will never die.	SRI BYTO CEHLB (nngsigi) Btu I ilwl enrve edi.
FOOL (sings) Sir Toby, there you lie.	FOOL (giisngn) Sri yoTb, ahtst a lei.
MALVOLIO This is much credit to you.	OIVOLMLA Tihs vioehabr eyarll asemk uoy olko aegtr.
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) Shall I bid him go?	RIS OYTB HLCEB (ignnisg) dhuloS I ltle mhi to go?
FOOL (sings) What an if you do?	OLFO (gnsngii) Wtha if y,ou do?
SIR TOBY BELCH (sings) Shall I bid him go, and spare not?	SIR TYBO LCHEB (gnising) louSdh I tlle mhi to go, nda be ashrh ihtw mih?
FOOL (sings) O no, no, no, no, you dare not.	LOOF (inigngs) Oh no, no, no, no, tndo uyo read.
SIR TOBY BELCH Out o tune, sir. You lie. Art any more than a steward? Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?	SIR TOYB BCHLE Tsath uot of netu, irs. uoY eil. (to OLOIAVML) Yuero tihnong erom than a entvars ehre. Do you khnit atth tjus auebecs ruoye a dogyo wto soshe, no eno esel anc yoenj flhsemi?
FOOL Yes, by Saint Anne, and ginger shall be hot i the mouth too.	FOOL hTey ianytlrec wlil. llhyTe vahe oldube speglnhi, oto.
SIR TOBY BELCH Thourt i the right. Go, sir, rub your chain with crumbs. A stoup of wine, Maria!	RIS OTBY LHCEB rYoue rithg. (to MALVOLIO) Go ihslpo oyur tdsswrae ihnca, ris. araiM, bigrn us some niwe!
MALVOLIO Mistress Mary, if you prized my ladys favor at anything more than contempt, you would not give means for this uncivil rule. She shall know of it, by this hand.	OAVOLLIM ssMi yMar, if ouy darce waht Ldya liaOiv nhitsk aotbu oyu at all, you dwnotlu oiutbcernt to htsi udre hvreaiob. I ursase yuo, slhle ndfi tuo autob htis.
Exit	MLIOVLOA exsti.
MARIA Go shake your ears!	RAAMI Go dna egliwg uroy raes!
SIR ANDREW Twere as good a deed as to drink when a mans a-hungry, to challenge him the field and then to break promise with him and make a fool of him.	SRI ADWERN heTsre gohtnni Id vleo eomr hant to amke a oofl uto of tath gyu oewsomh. I oudlc lhnleagec him to a dlue nda thne tno owsh up. Ttah wludo do hte rktci.
SIR TOBY BELCH Do t, knight. Ill write thee a challenge. Or Ill deliver thy indignation to him by word of mouth.	IRS OTYB LCEHB Do hatt. lIl ewrit a tterel elicgannhgl imh to a leud on uroy helfba. Or lIl reveild uoyr ustsinl to his caef.
MARIA Sweet Sir Toby, be patient for tonight. Since the youth of the counts was today with thy lady, she is much out of quiet. For Monsieur Malvolio, let me alone with him. If I do not gull him into a nayword and make him a common recreation, do not think I have wit enough to lie straight in my bed. I know I can do it.	IMRAA Daer Sri Tybo, dton do nytnghai ahsr httgoin. rvEe eincs eht euskD essmgeenr tvdeisi alviOi, hses eenb pteus. As fro eosriMun Maolivol, lte me keat ecra of imh. llI mkae a igb lfoo tuo of him, jstu tstru me. Ill kmea him fuosam rof his typtidius. orEenyve ilwl lauhg at mih. I know I anc do it.
SIR TOBY BELCH 125 Possess us, possess us, tell us something of him.	SRI TBOY LBEHC eTll us otghnesim uobat mih. Coem on, llet us gimestonh.
MARIA Marry, sir, sometimes he is a kind of puritan.	RMIAA Well, imsmsteeo he tcsa ilek a yoogd tow hesos.
SIR ANDREW O, if I thought that, Id beat him like a dog!	RIS AREWND Oh, llI beat mih up orf atth!
SIR TOBY BELCH What, for being a puritan? Thy exquisite reason, dear knight?	ISR OYBT BLECH oYeur ggnoi to baet him up fro gineb ogod? And hwast yuor ilntlabir rsonea fro ahtt, aelsep?
SIR ANDREW I have no exquisite reason for t, but I have reason good enough.	ISR RWENAD I ntdo veha nya nrblltiai soaern ofr it, tub I have a odgo oeguhn onaers.
MARIA The devil a puritan that he is, or anything constantly, but a time-pleaser; an affectioned ass that cons state without book and utters it by great swarths; the best persuaded of himself, so crammed, as he thinks, with excellencies, that it is his grounds of faith that all that look on him love him. And on that vice in him will my revenge find notable cause to work.	AIRMA He ntsi lraeyl atth urpe nda godo. seH sjtu a icntoecde frtetarle. sHe a etrsetinpuo yug hwo erpisas to speak adn act ilek iotlbyin. seH odrup, and he tnihsk seh so udfefst full of lenourwdf liiatqesu ttah eyenreov levos imh. hstaT eth awsesnek Ill seu to teg regneev on him.
SIR TOBY BELCH What wilt thou do?	RIS TYOB LBEHC taWh era you iongg to do?
MARIA I will drop in his way some obscure epistles of love, wherein by the color of his beard, the shape of his leg, the manner of his gait, the expressure of his eye, forehead, and complexion,he shall find himself most feelingly personated.	AARMI lIl ordp esmo orutyesmsi leov lestert in ihs hpta. lHle nhkti tyeehr dsdesdear to mih, ebceasu letlhy ibdecser het locro of sih daber, eth haesp of hsi lsge, teh ayw he kslwa, nda the sxeornpeis on ihs aefc. I cna meka my ridngwhaitn olko tusj keil yadL iivalOs: seh
I can write very like my lady your niece: on a forgotten matter we can hardly make distinction of our hands.	dan I anct llet het fenefedirc eebtnew echa rseoht dinrgawhtni.
SIR TOBY BELCH Excellent! I smell a device.	RIS OTBY CHBLE Eetlnlexc! Sunsdo iekl euvoy otg a dgoo irkct in idnm.
SIR ANDREW 145 I have t in my nose too.	IRS WDAREN I ilke it too.
SIR TOBY BELCH He shall think, by the letters that thou wilt drop, that they come from my niece, and that shes in love with him.	ISR BYTO LBECH leHl tihnk eseht estretl rea orfm iOliva nda atth hses in eolv hwti imh.
MARIA My purpose is, indeed, a horse of that color.	RAAMI Yes, hatts eht eadi.
SIR ANDREW And your horse now would make him an ass.	RIS NAWDRE Hes oggni to kool klei a oaltt ditoi.
MARIA 150 Ass, I doubt not.	ARAIM selbytouAl, uyo iiotd.
SIR ANDREW Oh, twill be admirable!	SRI WRDAEN This is oggin to be rtaeg!
MARIA Sport royal, I warrant you. I know my physic will work with him. I will plant you two, and let the fool make a third, where he shall find the letter. Observe his construction of it. For this night, to bed, and dream on the event. Farewell.	MIAAR tIs gongi to be nfu, I presiom. I wokn my mieincde liwl krow on hmi. Ill vhea uoy tow dhadnie teh lfoo igtrooth wrehe hell fidn the erlett. atchW hsi craentio. aehiMnwel, tesl go to bde adn earmd btoua hsit. dGoo thgni.
Exit	RAMAI ietsx.
SIR TOBY BELCH Good night, Penthesilea.	IRS TOYB CHBEL oGdo inght, yuo mzianag aomwn, uoy.
SIR ANDREW Before me, shes a good wench.	SRI DANWER ehsS a nief wnmoa, all ihgtr.
SIR TOBY BELCH Shes a beagle, true-bred, and one that adores me. What o that?	RIS TBYO LEHCB hSse a ogdo itltle mowna, nad hes oadsre me. Wtha tabou it?
SIR ANDREW 160 I was adored once too.	RSI DRANEW oomneSe aedrdo me ocen, oot.
SIR TOBY BELCH Lets to bed, knight. Thou hadst need send for more money.	RSI YOTB LEBHC sLte go to ebd, hntigk. orToorwm yuo nede to gte roem nmeoy tens to ouy.
SIR ANDREW If I cannot recover your niece, I am a foul way out.	RSI EANRDW If I catn easdrupe oyur ieenc to mrrya me, Im oggni to be in msoe issreuo aclainfin bruolet.
SIR TOBY BELCH Send for money, knight. If thou hast her not i the end, call me Cut.	SRI OYTB LHECB etG yruo hdans on osem oymen and tvregienhy illw be lla tighr. I ownk ollyu niw roev Ovalii in teh den.
SIR ANDREW 165 If I do not, never trust me, take it how you will.	SIR AWENRD I kwon I lwli too, if tsi teh tlas ighnt I do.
SIR TOBY BELCH Come, come, Ill go burn some sack. Tis too late to go to bed now. Come, knight. Come, knight.	RSI TOYB LHCEB eomC on, lIl go armw up a einc asgls of yhserr rof us. Its oot elta to go to ebd now. omCe on, my fdrine, come on.
Exeunt	Teyh tiex.