Twelfth Night

by: William Shakespeare

Original Text

Modern Text

VIOLA

I shall be much bound to you for ’t. I am one that had rather go with sir priest than sir knight. I care not who knows so much of my mettle.

VIOLA

I’d be very grateful to you if you did. I’m much more of a religious type than a fighter, and I don’t care who knows it.
Exeunt
They exit.
Enter SIR TOBY BELCH, with SIR ANDREW
SIR TOBY BELCH enters with SIR ANDREW.

SIR TOBY BELCH

Why, man, he’s a very devil. I have not seen such a firago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard, and all, and he gives me the stuck-in with such a mortal motion, that it is inevitable. And on the answer, he pays you as surely as your feet hit the ground they step on. They say he has been fencer to the Sophy.

SIR TOBY BELCH

Wow, he’s a real devil. I’ve never seen such a monster. I had a round with him, and his sword thrust is so deadly that you can’t even duck out of the way. And when he strikes back at you, he’ll hit you as sure as you’re standing there. They say he used to fence for the shah of Persia.

SIR ANDREW

Pox on ’t! I’ll not meddle with him.

SIR ANDREW

That’s it! I won’t mess with him.

SIR TOBY BELCH

Ay, but he will not now be pacified. Fabian can scarce hold him yonder.

SIR TOBY BELCH

Yes, but now there’s no way to calm him down. Fabian can hardly control him over there.

SIR ANDREW

255Plague on ’t, an I thought he had been valiant and so cunning in fence, I’d have seen him damned ere I’d have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip, and I’ll give him my horse, gray Capilet.

SIR ANDREW

Darn it, if I’d guessed he was so brave and such a good swordsman, I never would have challenged him. I’ll give him my gray horse Capilet if he forgets the whole thing.

SIR TOBY BELCH  

I’ll make the motion. Stand here, make a good show on ’t.
260This shall end without the perdition of souls. (aside) Marry,
I’ll ride your horse as well as I ride you.

SIR TOBY BELCH

I’ll give it a try. Stay right here and try to look good. This may end without anyone getting killed. (to himself) I’ll ride your horse just like I ride you.
Enter FABIAN and VIOLA
FABIAN and VIOLA enter.