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The SparkNotes Blog

Homework help made hilarious.

Everything That Happened In 2019, Summed Up In Shakespeare Quotes

We really went through it this year, didn’t we? From the birth of Baby Yoda to that incredibly divisive Game of Thrones finale, 2019 was a year of firsts, of lasts, and of good old-fashioned Kardashian drama. And the hits just keep on coming! We might yet have more plot twists in store, but here’s everything that’s happened as of the publishing of this article.

If you’re curious (and why wouldn’t you be?), here’s everything that happened in 20162017, and 2018. You’re welcome!

When Netflix and Hulu released Fyre Festival documentaries within days of each other:
I hear their drums: let’s set our men in order,
And issue forth and bid them battle straight.
Henry VI Part 3, Act 1, scene 2

When the college admissions scandal broke:
And therefore hath she bribed the Destinies…
Venus and Adonis

When Trump got impeached:
And so his peers upon this evidence
Have found him guilty of high treason.
Henry VIII, Act 2, scene 1

When the Sonic the Hedgehog trailer was released, and the backlash was immediate:
Where wilt thou find a cavern dark enough
To mask thy monstrous visage?
Julius Caesar, Act 2, scene 1

When Keanu Reeves was suddenly in everything, and we were blessed with the Keanussaince:
All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players.
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts.
As You Like It, Act 2, scene 7

When Tom Hooper’s adaptation of Cats hit theaters:
O horror, horror, horror! Tongue nor heart
Cannot conceive nor name thee!
Macbeth, Act 2, scene 3

When Sony and Marvel went to war over Spider-man:
Two households, both alike in dignity,
In fair Verona, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
Romeo and Juliet, Act 1, prologue

When young activists like Greta Thunberg began demanding action on climate change:
For, I believe, they are portentous things
Unto the climate that they point upon.
Julius Caesar, Act 1, scene 3

When dozens of people stormed Area 51 in search of aliens:
Search out thy wit for secret policies,
And we will make thee famous through the world.
Henry VI Part I, Act 3, scene 3

When Colton Underwood jumped the fence on The Bachelor and ran off, forcing producers to chase after him:
Unsavoury news! but how made he escape?
Henry VI Part 3, Act 4, scene 6

When 30-50 feral hogs became a meme:
Come on, come on; where is your boar-spear, man?
Fear you the boar, and go so unprovided?
Richard III, Act 3, scene 2

When Boris Johnson became Prime Minister:
That’s the worst tidings that I hear of yet.
Henry IV Part 1, Act 4, scene 1

When Elon Musk introduced the shatter-proof cyber-truck and it immediately got shattered:
Oft expectation fails and most oft there
Where most it promises.
All’s Well That Ends Well, Act 2, scene 1

When Game of Thrones ended not with a bang, but with a whimper:
Parting is such sweet sorrow.
Romeo and Juliet, Act 2, scene 2