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Amah is Ying-ying’s nursemaid who dotes on her. As Amah was forced to give up her own son in the wake of her husband’s death, she treats Ying-ying like her own daughter. She works hard to instill in Ying-ying quietness, meekness, and self-effacement, qualities all considered important for a young lady. However, Amah also embodies these qualities herself. Looking back on her life, Ying-ying observes that as a child she treats Amah thoughtlessly because Amah never teaches Ying-ying to consider her feelings. This phrasing highlights that Ying-ying is not intentionally careless toward Amah, rather that Amah never asserts her own personhood to Ying-ying. She never reminds Ying-ying of the life she gave up to become her Amah. This self-effacing mothering parallels how Ying-ying never tells Clifford or Lena about her past or her struggles, instead focusing on caring for them. Amah thus contributes to the novel's conversations around motherhood and sacrifice. Ying-ying loves Amah like “a blessing you appreciate and love only when it is no longer there,” a phrase that could easily describe the relationship the younger generation has with their mothers.
