Magical Thinking
Magical thinking, the central motif of the memoir, reinforces
Didion’s assertion that grief is a state of mental illness during
which rational thought is replaced by an extreme version of corrective thinking.
Magical thinking is the childlike belief that we are able to control
outcomes and change the world around us through the intensity of
our wishes and desires. For Didion, magical thinking takes several
forms. First, she believes that she can somehow sift through her
memory and change the outcomes of events, and by doing so be able
to prevent John from dying. Second, she believes that if she controls
certain aspects of her circumstances, she will bring John back,
as illustrated by her need to hold onto his shoes for his return.
Finally, she applies this kind of corrective thinking toward Quintana’s
illness, believing that if she does enough research or makes the
right phone calls, she’ll be able to help her daughter recover.
Magical thinking takes multiple forms throughout the memoir, representing
the varied states of delusion and denial that occur throughout the
grief process and reinforcing the theme of grief as a state of mental
illness.
The Vortex Effect
Didion begins to experience the vortex effect—in which
she is paralyzed by memories triggered by seemingly mundane circumstances—as
she begins to come to terms with John’s death and Quintana’s illness.
Though painful and disorienting, the vortex effect is an essential
part of the process Didion must undergo to fully accept the tragedies.
Didion first experiences the vortex effect when she visits Quintana
in the hospital in New York. A flood of memories overwhelms her,
temporarily taking her out her surroundings. The vortex effect eventually
becomes a deeply upsetting experience, and when Didion returns to
Los Angeles, she desperately avoids places and situations that remind
her of life with John and Quintana. However, she soon discovers
that even seemingly benign triggers, such as commercials or calendar
dates, are capable of setting off the effect. Only after Didion
has rebuilt the emotional resilience to face her memories does the
vortex effect begin to subside. The vortex effect is consistent
with the idea that grief is a state of temporary mental illness.
The Ordinary Instant
Didion notes how tragedy can strike suddenly, during an
ordinary moment, and life-changing events often give no notice of
their arrival. In The Year of Magical Thinking, she
traces this motif through both personal and large-scale events.
In her own family, John dies suddenly while sitting down to dinner,
and Quintana collapses while walking through an airport. Didion
compares these events to the Pearl Harbor and World Trade Center
attacks. Didion describes how accounts of both events tend to emphasize
how routine and ordinary the days had seemed prior to the catastrophes, which
only served to throw the astonishment that spectators felt into
higher relief. Didion illustrates how, when it comes to life-changing
events, people irrationally expect that they’ll be given an opportunity
to brace themselves to make the outcome easier to bear. And yet,
this is rarely the case, and often the grieving and mourning process
is intensified by the shock of the event.
