payment page
I remembered that Sam introduced me as her friend to Bob. And I remembered that Patrick had done the same for Brad. And I started to cry. And nobody in that room looked at me weird for doing it.
When Charlie realizes that Patrick and Sam now consider him their friend and openly introduce him as such to their group, the emotional significance of the moment can’t be understated. He’s so moved by knowing that he has a reciprocal friendship with Sam and Patrick that he begins to cry, and everyone around him seems to understand and accept this reaction. Charlie has struggled with friendship – he doesn’t make friends easily, and his only close friend until now is dead. But when he opens himself up to a friendship with Sam and Patrick, it’s obvious how much he’s been needing companionship in his life. If Charlie hadn’t become more participatory in his own life, he may have never found the opportunity to connect with these new friends, leaving himself even more vulnerable to loneliness and depression.
I don’t know what it was, and I know we didn’t really accomplish anything, but it felt great to sit there and talk about our place in things.
Charlie discovers that there is a sense of peace and entertainment in simply discussing and conversing with friends, even if those discussions aren’t particularly deep or enlightening. Just being in a group, enjoying one another’s company, and talking about life, politics, and art is enough to make human beings, social creatures at our cores, content. While Charlie’s classic novels are great for expanding his mind, they can’t fulfill his need for belonging and companionship in the way that conversing with his friends can.
Take their hands when the slow song comes up for a change. Or be the one who asks someone for a date. Or tell people what you need. Or what you want.
Sam tells Charlie that if he truly wants to experience life and love, he needs to be a more active participant in his own life. Charlie has been making progress with this throughout the novel, making friends and having meaningful interactions with others. But despite this, he often still takes the role of observer. Sam reminds him that being a wallflower can only take him so far – if he wants to end up with the person he loves, or if he wants to truly succeed in any relationship or endeavor, he needs to take the reins by showing and telling the world what he wants and needs.
I thought about Patrick calling me his friend. And I thought about Sam telling me to do things. To really be there. And I just thought how great it was to have friends and a family.
After Bill encourages Charlie to participate more, Charlie steps out of his shell by striking up a conversation with Patrick at a football game. This one act of bravery starts a chain reaction that ultimately gains him an entire friend group, brings him closer to his family, and introduces him to the first woman he’s ever fallen in love with. If Charlie had never taken the first step, he wouldn’t have gotten to experience this moment of realizing that he has true friends and family who support and love him above all else.
Tomorrow, I start my sophomore year of high school. And believe it or not, I’m really not that afraid of going. I’m not sure if I will have the time to write any more letters because I might be too busy trying to ‘participate.’
At the beginning of the novel, Charlie is traumatized by his friend’s death and struggles to make connections in school. While his reservations are understandable, he needed to step out of his shell in order to make friends, curb his loneliness, and find a strong support system. By the end of the novel, he’s done all these things and more. He’s been initiated into his young adult life through a myriad of experiences ranging from wonderful to deeply painful. He’ll go into his sophomore year of high school with confidence, ready to be an active participant in his own life.
