You told him what he wasn’t but you didn’t tell him what he was.

Ifemelu makes this comment to Aunty Uju in Chapter 43, when she blames Aunty Uju for causing Dike’s suicide attempt. While the blame may not lie entirely on Aunty Uju, Ifemelu’s observation has merit. Aunty Uju emotionally damages Dike by hiding the truth about his roots, echoing the value the novel places on authenticity and honesty. Aunty Uju’s refusal to tell Dike the truth about her relationship with The General leads Dike to assume that his father did not love him, making him feel unwanted. Although the truth is not pretty, Dike gains confidence from learning about The General. Throughout Dike’s life in America, Aunty Uju has not allowed him to learn about being Nigerian other than by threatening to send him back to Nigeria as punishment and scolding him in Igbo. Therefore, Dike has negative associations with his Nigerian heritage. Because Dike finds himself caught between a heritage cloaked in lies and the negative experiences that come with being mistaken for a Black American, Dike cannot build an authentic sense of self.